The herd mentality on your message board is sickening. In fact, it's pathetic. I remember when I first started posting here, and people were very civil. Then Joe Caltech and useatoothbrush began working 24/7 to turn everyone against me, starting flamewars that annoyed everyone (thus making people annoyed with me as much as with them) and eventually forcing me to withdraw from the board. As I left, receding into my prestigious life (and taking a very prestigious road trip on which I had no Internet access) I was ridiculed in my absence by you unprestigious shits. A few good souls defended me, but most of my former CB pseudofriends had turned against me. I don't much care-- this board is a useless TTT-- but I resent the lack of character.

Let me tell you about these TTTs, Joe Caltech and useatoothbrush. Joe Caltech is Joe Jewell who did, as claimed, study at Caltech. I know several people who know him, and they have informed me as to his dubious behavior at Caltech. Late at night, he would be found in the library under a blanket, reading books such as Mein Kampf, various bits of racist early-20th century British literature (including psychological treatises on the supposed superiority of the Anglo race, which was, shamefully, believed in wide swaths of the academy at the time). He was obsessed with fascism, colonial racism, and all sorts of other evils. This, alone, is not damning. After all, intellectual interest is not the same thing as endorsement. However, he later confided in two friends, one male and one female, that he was symphathetic to fascism. He said that if he did not make it as an engineer, he would seek to manipulate historical data of Palestine, circa 1st century, into a book claiming to prove that Jesus was not Jewish, but in fact Aryan (as the Nazis had attempted to do). While Jewell never claimed to endorse Nazism and fascism, he has said to at least two mutual friends that (and I paraphrase here) "really, the Nazis and fascists were not as bad as thought. History has been unfair and unkind to them." He also has been associated with a California historical society that endorses Holocaust denial. Of course, all of this information only comes from three entirely independent sources close to Jewell, and does not necessarily constitute proof, but the presence of such suspicion indicates alarming shortfalls in his character.

Use a toothbrush (Rebecca Ferrell) is also a singularly disgusting human being. On the night of Saturday, 30 October 2004, she was at a party where a female acquaintance of hers had passed out. She is widely believed within her class to have offered a very drunk sophomore male $20.00 to rape this woman in her state of stupor. (He refused.) Rebecca was intoxicated at the time, but this disgusting behavior cannot be excused by alcohol. She's a terrible, loathsome person. This is only one example of bad behavior on her part, and there are many more. She has a chronic scowl and a vindictive personality. Close friends of hers refer to her as "the blonde whore", though I do not know of anything specific to verify this charge, and I will not make it without proof.

With this information generously supplied, I ascend back into my prestigious life.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3566874)

175 if it was the real animal.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3567454)

Why do I only see you posting in pensive-related threads? (Not to accuse you of anything. I'm just curious.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3567499)

I'm a long-time lurker, and I don't see the need to post very often. This pensive crap just makes me angry, though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3567576)

Did you go to Carleton? Is that how you know him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3567687)

What's funnier is that I didn't even know anything substantial about pensive until I read some back posts. I can't figure out why people attacked him.

A year from now, "hi pensive!" will persist but no one will remember who pensive was.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3568937)

He was pretty spunky and very argumentative which seemed to rub people the wrong way (especially Joe w/his deserved alpha dog status). If nothing else, he was pretty interesting. I wish he would at least come back to the grad board. Too bad.

Oh, and where the hell has Joe been?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3569027)

Questioner: I hope you won't be offended if I ask you to prove to me that you're a nullo. Just so that our readers will know that this isn't a fake.

Bill: Sure, no problem. (stands and unbuckles pants and drops them to his ankles, revealing a smooth, shaven crotch with only a thin scar to show where his genitals once were).

Q: Thank you. That's a remarkable sight.

(laughs and pulls pants back up). Most people think so.

Q: What made you decide to become a nullo?

(pauses). Well, it really wasn't entirely my decision.

Q: Excuse me?

The idea wasn't mine. It was my lover's idea.

Q: Please explain what you mean.

Okay, it's a long story. You have to understand my relationship with Michael before you'll know what happened.

Q: We have plenty of time. Please go on.

Both of us were into the leather lifestyle when we met through a personal ad. Michael's ad was very specific: he was looking for someone to completely dominate and modify to his pleasure. In other word, a slave.

The ad intrigued me. I had been in a number of B&D scenes and also some S&M, but I found them unsatisfying because they were all temporary. After the fun was over, everybody went on with life as usual.

I was looking for a complete life change. I wanted to meet someone who would be part of my life forever. Someone who would control me and change me at his whim.

Q: In other words, you're a true masochist.

Oh yes, no doubt about that. I've always been totally passive in my sexual relationships.

Anyway, we met and there was instant chemistry. Michael is a few years older than me and very good looking. Our personalities meshed totally. He's very dominant.

I went back to his place after drinks and had the best sex of my life. That's when I knew I was going to be with Michael for a long, long time.

Q: What sort of things did you two do?

It was very heavy right away. He restrained me and whipped me for quite awhile. He put clamps on my nipples and a ball gag in my mouth. And he hung a ball bag on my sack with some very heavy weights. That bag really bounced around when Michael fucked me from behind.

Q: Ouch.

(laughs) Yeah, no kidding. At first I didn't think I could take the pain, but Michael worked me through it and after awhile I was flying. I was sorry when it was over.

Michael enjoyed it as much as I did. Afterwards he talked about what kind of a commitment I'd have to make if I wanted to stay with him.

Q: What did he say exactly?

Well, besides agreeing to be his slave in every way, I'd have to be ready to be modified. To have my body modified.

Q: Did he explain what he meant by that?

Not specifically, but I got the general idea. I guessed that something like castration might be part of it.

Q: How did that make you feel?

(laughs) I think it would make any guy a little hesitant.

Q: But it didn't stop you from agreeing to Michael's terms?

No it didn't. I was totally hooked on this man. I knew that I was willing to pay any price to be with him.

Anyway, a few days later I moved in with Michael. He gave me the rules right away: I'd have to be naked at all times while we were indoors, except for a leather dog collar that I could never take off. I had to keep my head shaved. And I had to wear a butt plug except when I needed to take a shit or when we were having sex.

I had to sleep on the floor next to his bed. I ate all my food on the floor, too.

The next day he took me to a piercing parlor where he had my nipples done, and a Prince Albert put into the head of my cock.

Q: Heavy stuff.

Yeah, and it got heavier. He used me as a toilet, pissing in my mouth. I had to lick his asshole clean after he took a shit, too. It was all part of a process to break down any sense of individuality I had. After awhile, I wouldn't hesitate to do anything he asked.

Q: Did the sex get rougher?

Oh God, yeah. He started fisting me every time we had sex. But he really started concentrating on my cock and balls, working them over for hours at a time.

He put pins into the head of my cock and into my sack. He attached clothespins up and down my cock and around my sack. The pain was pretty bad. He had to gag me to keep me from screaming.

Q: When did the idea of nullification come up?

Well, it wasn't nullification at first. He started talking about how I needed to make a greater commitment to him, to do something to show that I was dedicated to him for life.

When I asked him what he meant, he said that he wanted to take my balls.

Q: How did you respond?

Not very well at first. I told him that I liked being a man and didn't want to become a eunuch. But he kept at me, and wore me down. He reminded me that I agreed to be modified according to his wishes, and this is what he wanted for me. Anything less would show that I wasn't really committed to the relationship. And besides, I was a total bottom and didn't really need my balls.

It took about a week before I agreed to be castrated. But I wasn't happy about it, believe me.

Q: How did he castrate you?

Michael had a friend who was into the eunuch scene. One night he came over with his bag of toys, and Michael told me that this was it. I was gonna lose my nuts then and there.

Q: Did you think of resisting?

I did for a minute, but deep down I knew there was no way. I just didn't want to lose Michael. I'd rather lose my balls.

Michael's friend restrained me on the living room floor while Michael videotaped us. He used an elastrator to put a band around my sack.

Q: That must have really hurt.

Hell yeah. It's liked getting kicked in the balls over and over again. I screamed for him to cut the band off, but he just kept on going, putting more bands on me. I had four bands around my sack when he finished.

I was rolling around on the floor screaming, while Michael just videotaped me. Eventually, my sack got numb and the pain subsided. I looked between my legs and could see my sack was a dark purple. I knew my balls were dying inside.

Michael and his friend left the room and turned out the light. I lay there for hours, crying because I was turning into a eunuch and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

Q: What happened then?

Eventually I fell asleep from exhaustion. Then the light switched on and I could see Michael's friend kneeling between my legs, touching my sack. I heard him tell Michael that my balls were dead.

Q: How did Michael react?

Very pleased. He bent down and felt around my sack. He said that it felt cold.

Michael's friend told me that I needed to keep the bands on. He said that eventually my balls and sack would dry up and fall off. I just nodded. What else could I do at that point?

Q: Did it happen just like Michael's friend said?

Yeah, a week or so later my package just fell off. Michael put it in a jar of alcohol to preserve it. It's on the table next to his bed.

Q: How did things go after that?

Michael was really loving to me. He kept saying how proud he was of me, how grateful that I had made the commitment to him. He even let me sleep in his bed.

Q: What about the sex?

We waited awhile after my castration, and then took it easy until I was completely healed. At first I was able to get hard, but as the weeks went by my erections began to disappear.

That pleased Michael. He liked fucking me and feeling my limp cock. It made his dominance over me even greater.

Q: When did he start talking about making you a nullo?

A couple of months after he took my nuts. Our sex had gotten to be just as rough as before the castration. He really got off on torturing my cock. Then he started saying stuff like, "Why do you even need this anymore?"

That freaked me out. I always thought that he might someday take my balls, but I never imagined that he'd go all the way. I told him that I wanted to keep my dick.

Q: How did he react to that?

At first he didn't say much. But he kept pushing. Michael said I would look so nice being smooth between my legs. He said my dick was small and never got hard anymore, so what was the point of having it.

But I still resisted. I wanted to keep my cock. I felt like I wouldn't be a man anymore without it.

Q: So how did he get you to agree?

He didn't. He took it against my will.

Q: How did that happen?

We were having sex in the basement, and I was tied up and bent over this wooden bench as he fucked me. Then I heard the doorbell ring. Michael answered it, and he brought this guy into the room.

At first I couldn't see anything because of the way I was tied. But then I felt these hands lift me up and put me on my back. And I could see it was Michael's friend, the guy who took my nuts.

Q: How did you react?

I started screaming and crying, but the guy just gagged me. The two of them dragged me to the other side of the room where they tied me spread eagled on the floor.

Michael's friend snaked a catheter up my dick, and gave me a shot to numb my crotch. I was grateful for that, at least. I remember how bad it hurt to lose my balls.

Q: What was Michael doing at this time?

He was kneeling next to me talking quietly. He said I'd be happy that they were doing this. That it would make our relationship better. That kind of calmed me down. I thought, "Well, maybe it won't be so bad."

Q: How long did the penectomy take?

It took awhile. Some of the penis is inside the body, so he had to dig inside to get all of it. There was a lot of stitching up and stuff. He put my cock in the same jar with my balls. You can even see the Prince Albert sticking out of the head.

Then they made me a new pisshole. It's between my asshole and where my sack used to be. So now I have to squat to piss.

Q: What has life been like since you were nullified?

After I got over the surgery and my anger, things got better. When I healed up, I began to like my smooth look. Michael brought friends over and they all admired it, saying how pretty I looked. It made me feel good that Michael was proud of me.

Q: Do you have any sexual feeling anymore?

Yes, my prostate still responds when Michael fucks me or uses the buttplug. And my nipples are quite sensitive. If Michael plays with them while fucking me, I have a kind of orgasm. It's hard to describe, but it's definitely an orgasm.

Sometimes Michael says he's gonna have my prostate and nipples removed, but he's just kidding around. He's happy with what he's done to me.

Q: So are you glad Michael had you nullified?

Well, I wouldn't say I'm glad. If I could, I'd like to have my cock and balls back. But I know that I'm a nullo forever. So I'm making the best of it.

Michael and I are very happy. I know that he'll take care of me and we'll be together always. I guess losing my manhood was worth it to make that happen for us

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3567469)

A+

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#3574636)

Good times

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=238301&forum_id=1#5227727)