Date: November 26th, 2015 10:43 PM
Author: unholy garrison idea he suggested
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How to Come Out at Thanksgiving
NOV. 20, 2015 20 COMMENTS
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By MALIA WOLLAN
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‘‘Enjoy your meal first,’’ says Kristin Russo, who told her parents she was a lesbian during a spontaneous post-pie moment in 1998, when she was 17. Coming out at Thanksgiving is very common, especially on that first holiday home from college, says Russo, who went on to co-found Everyone Is Gay, an organization that offers advice and support for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth and their parents. The holiday can be a warm, nonreligious backdrop, particularly if your meal tends to be a more intimate, nuclear-family affair.
There is, of course, no right or wrong time (or way) to come out, but if you opt for Thanksgiving, think through possible outcomes first. ‘‘You need to have a plan,’’ Russo says. This is especially true if there is any chance your family will hurt you, kick you out of the house or withhold college-tuition money. Even if your announcement is welcomed, prepare for everything to stop. Russo recalls the table going quiet and then her mom crying. If your experience goes badly, she says, ‘‘just know that things can change.’’
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You might be tempted to open up during a gap between activities — just before the turkey is pulled from the oven, say. Don’t. Choose a more relaxed, satiated moment when there are at least 30 minutes open for discussion. ‘‘Ask your family,’’ Russo says, ‘‘Hey, do you have questions? Can I tell you more about myself?’’ Whether it is dishes or charades, know what the next activity is and lead people to it. ‘‘You can say, We will talk about this more, but for now let’s go watch ‘Planes, Trains and Automobiles.’ ’’ Sometimes it is important to remind your family that you’re still you.
Decide how far you want information to spread. ‘‘If you’re going to tell Aunt Rhonda, be prepared for the rest of creation to know,’’ Russo says. If you’d prefer to keep things among your immediate family, say so. Whether your pronouncement is met with love, concern or we-knew-it-all-along indifference, expect a rush of adrenaline-laced emotions. If at the end of the night, you feel isolated and alone, Russo says, ‘‘Remember, there is a whole world outside of your house.’’
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3054272&forum_id=2).#29259378)