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Simplest explanation for Shroud of Turin (occam's razor): Jesus emitted sunrays

When He was reborn, photons (most likely approximating sunli...
talented self-centered school cafeteria
  08/23/24
I mean, maybe the whole time he was saying "I am the su...
pea-brained genital piercing center
  11/11/24
...
saffron set roommate
  11/11/24
couldn't jesus also have just been very sweaty?
diverse party of the first part
  08/23/24
Any liquid that got absorbed by the fibers would wick out in...
talented self-centered school cafeteria
  08/23/24
IMO the people looking into the shroud of Turin or the pyram...
duck-like costumed locale regret
  08/23/24
I came up with a homebrew solution too. However, it would ne...
talented self-centered school cafeteria
  08/23/24
Going to have to disagree with you here boss. It is complete...
exhilarant sickened tank heaven
  11/11/24
BTW I was just flaming here to cause a scuffle and actually ...
exhilarant sickened tank heaven
  11/11/24
The earliest the crusaders would have gotten there a thousan...
talented self-centered school cafeteria
  11/11/24
Jesus loves you and is the son of God.
offensive bawdyhouse
  08/23/24
great (and correct) use of deific capitalization itt
Passionate insecure church half-breed
  08/27/24
...
domesticated cheese-eating digit ratio stead
  08/27/24
...
duck-like costumed locale regret
  08/27/24
jesus wants me for a sunbeam
electric tan brunch striped hyena
  11/11/24
if this is the real image of Jesus, that makes Trump the rea...
sepia razzle-dazzle filthpig principal's office
  11/11/24
Blood stains across the head and wrists and slashes to the b...
Fuchsia bateful mexican
  11/11/24
...
https://imgur.com/a/o2g8xYK
  11/22/25


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Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2024 5:49 PM
Author: talented self-centered school cafeteria

When He was reborn, photons (most likely approximating sunlight) shot out of His body and left this kind of burn-mark in His image in the cloth.

Every other explanation requires all sorts of logical contortions and baseless assumptions. The above listed explanation only requires you to believe that Jesus emitted these photons after He died. Even if you think that's a baseless assumption, it's still the ONLY assumption my theory requires. Occam's razor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48000020)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2024 2:28 PM
Author: pea-brained genital piercing center

I mean, maybe the whole time he was saying "I am the sun"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48323057)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2024 6:35 PM
Author: saffron set roommate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48324043)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2024 5:52 PM
Author: diverse party of the first part

couldn't jesus also have just been very sweaty?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48000025)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2024 11:05 PM
Author: talented self-centered school cafeteria

Any liquid that got absorbed by the fibers would wick out into the surrounding fabric and give us a much blurrier image.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48001076)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2024 11:17 PM
Author: duck-like costumed locale regret

IMO the people looking into the shroud of Turin or the pyramids are always liberal artists who don’t know wtf they’re talking about. An Engineer could come up with all sorts of shit we haven’t heard about. You could probably re-create the shroud of Turin by using some Herb or something

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48001101)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2024 11:20 PM
Author: talented self-centered school cafeteria

I came up with a homebrew solution too. However, it would never occur to me to use actual 1,400 year old cloth 700 years before we had the technology to determine the age of cloth.

Also, there was no way for a buyer to know how old a piece of cloth was cira 1350 AD. There was simply no society on earth that kept continuous track of time between 0AD and 1350. It would have been pure dumb luck that this forgery artist snagged a piece of cloth that was exactly the right age.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48001110)



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Date: November 11th, 2024 2:23 PM
Author: exhilarant sickened tank heaven

Going to have to disagree with you here boss. It is completely conceivable that some Middle Age opportunists located some AUTHENTIC AD 0 cloth when raping and pillaging their way across the holy land and used it to fake the Shroud of Turin and straight DEFRAUD some wealthy gilded era venician merchants.

It could have been taken from a tomb with a date on it. Or used to wrap up some relics in a monastery and closely tracked across ages.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48323045)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2024 6:32 PM
Author: exhilarant sickened tank heaven

BTW I was just flaming here to cause a scuffle and actually believe the shroud is legit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48324030)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2024 8:01 PM
Author: talented self-centered school cafeteria

The earliest the crusaders would have gotten there a thousand years after the cloth was made. Who was keeping tabs on anything for a 1000 years continuously anywhere in the world?

Grave robbery might make sense if there's an actual inscription you can read that gives the actual accurate date of the burial. But why bother? The Pope wasn't doing radiocarbon dating back then. Why wouldn't crusaders just use any old linen to make the entire thing?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48324346)



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Date: August 23rd, 2024 11:21 PM
Author: offensive bawdyhouse

Jesus loves you and is the son of God.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48001113)



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Date: August 27th, 2024 7:22 AM
Author: Passionate insecure church half-breed

great (and correct) use of deific capitalization itt

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48013119)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 27th, 2024 7:53 AM
Author: domesticated cheese-eating digit ratio stead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48013152)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 27th, 2024 8:12 AM
Author: duck-like costumed locale regret



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48013181)



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Date: November 11th, 2024 2:29 PM
Author: electric tan brunch striped hyena

jesus wants me for a sunbeam

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48323063)



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Date: November 11th, 2024 2:56 PM
Author: sepia razzle-dazzle filthpig principal's office

if this is the real image of Jesus, that makes Trump the real antichrist and Elon Musk is his Head Demon of Lies and Evil. Elon Musk rearranged is, after all, Lone Skum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48323159)



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Date: November 11th, 2024 6:53 PM
Author: Fuchsia bateful mexican

Blood stains across the head and wrists and slashes to the back. Pretty good chance it's the real deal.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#48324097)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 22nd, 2025 5:43 PM
Author: https://imgur.com/a/o2g8xYK




(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5581838&forum_id=2/#49452530)