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Kramer gets a job at DOGE and eliminates Newman's job

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Iridescent shaky clown background story
  02/05/25
"Tubes, Jerry. We can put all the mail in tubes!"
misanthropic exhilarant community account station
  02/05/25
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Iridescent shaky clown background story
  02/06/25
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pea-brained business firm pocket flask
  02/06/25
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Iridescent shaky clown background story
  03/01/25
[JERRY and KRAMER are in JERRY's kitchen] JERRY: What's w...
Passionate Rehab
  03/01/25
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Infuriating Double Fault
  03/01/25
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Flirting Bisexual Rigor Orchestra Pit
  03/02/25
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White Concupiscible Filthpig
  03/02/25
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Cheese-eating hilarious faggot firefighter
  03/02/25
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heady dysfunction
  03/02/25
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Iridescent shaky clown background story
  03/02/25
I love this
deep very tactful athletic conference
  03/02/25
180
hairraiser honey-headed dilemma
  03/02/25
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Mint persian base
  03/02/25
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At-the-ready Well-lubricated Locale Coldplay Fan
  03/02/25
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Offensive disrespectful menage
  03/02/25
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deep very tactful athletic conference
  03/03/25
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outnumbered new version love of her life
  03/03/25
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Pale Insanely Creepy Ticket Booth Sound Barrier
  03/04/25
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Plum Point National Security Agency
  03/07/25
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Sticky Pearly Nursing Home
  03/07/25
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pink comical messiness
  03/07/25
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Flirting Bisexual Rigor Orchestra Pit
  03/07/25
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Turquoise spectacular cruise ship
  03/07/25
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Passionate Rehab
  03/01/25
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Passionate Rehab
  03/02/25
Excellent
doobsian khaki sex offender gas station
  03/02/25
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Trip snowy gaping
  03/02/25
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Passionate Rehab
  03/03/25
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Passionate Rehab
  03/03/25
180. I was the OP btw.
Iridescent shaky clown background story
  03/03/25
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Passionate Rehab
  03/04/25
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deep very tactful athletic conference
  03/07/25
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outnumbered new version love of her life
  03/07/25
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evan39
  07/16/25
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"im pumo now"
  07/16/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: February 5th, 2025 11:04 PM
Author: Iridescent shaky clown background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48627006)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 5th, 2025 11:06 PM
Author: misanthropic exhilarant community account station

"Tubes, Jerry. We can put all the mail in tubes!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48627011)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 6th, 2025 10:48 AM
Author: Iridescent shaky clown background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48627915)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 6th, 2025 10:48 AM
Author: pea-brained business firm pocket flask



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48627917)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 1st, 2025 8:52 PM
Author: Iridescent shaky clown background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48706441)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 1st, 2025 9:48 PM
Author: Passionate Rehab

[JERRY and KRAMER are in JERRY's kitchen]

JERRY: What's with the suit?

KRAMER: It's full return to office, buddy.

JERRY: Return to office? What are you talking about?

KRAMER: I got a job at DOGE.

*laughter*

JERRY: Since when do you have a job?

KRAMER: Since last week. I'm making America great again.

*laughter*

JERRY: But all you've ever done is work at a donut shop, and that was like twenty years ago.

KRAMER: Well evidently the hiring managers at DOGE liked what they saw in my application.

*laughter*

[ELAINE enters]

JERRY: Hey, what's going on?

ELAINE: I just got back from the IRS office downtown. What a mess!

JERRY: So you're still waiting for your refund?

ELAINE: Jerry, I couldn't even get in the building. The line was a mile long.

KRAMER: Those positions were eliminated.

ELAINE: What are you talking about?

KRAMER: President Trump determined that those IRS workers weren't contributing to the national good. They had to go.

*laughter*

ELAINE: You work for the government? What year is this?

*laughter*

KRAMER: Elaine, those layabouts at the IRS were weak and inefficient. They're worse than the DMV!

*laughter*

ELAINE: So when am I going to get my tax refund?

KRAMER: In due time, don't worry.

*laughter*

[NEWMAN enters]

JERRY: Hello Newman.

*laughter*

NEWMAN: Hello Jerry.

*laughter*

KRAMER: Newman, you look terrible. What's the matter?

NEWMAN: It's pandemonium down at the post office! Elon Musk laid off 8,000 postal workers yesterday!

JERRY: 8,000?

NEWMAN: Yeah, and he's just getting started! The entire New York division is being wiped out, and pensions are being canceled!

ELAINE: Pensions?

NEWMAN: I was gonna get six-figures for life with full benefits. Medical, dental, even acupuncture! It's all gone!

JERRY: That's a shame.

*laughter*

KRAMER: Newman, your position was wasteful and inefficient. DOGE is merely restoring the public trust.

NEWMAN: You gotta help me Kramer! I didn't put in twenty-hour weeks just to lose everything!

*laughter*

KRAMER: Newman, you're still young and can try something new. You know that ice cream parlor down the street? They're hiring.

ELAINE: Yeah, Newman needs more ice cream.

*laughter*

NEWMAN: I'll remember this! You may sit up here and laugh as a man's dreams are crushed, but someday I'll return in all my glory to get revenge! Just when you think you're safe you'll open your door one day to --

JERRY: Newman!

*laughter*

[NEWMAN departs as GEORGE arrives]

GEORGE: What's with Newman?

KRAMER: I eliminated his position.

*laughter*

GEORGE: Since when do you work?

KRAMER: Since President Trump decided to streamline the federal workforce and increase efficiency.

GEORGE: And they hired you?

KRAMER: You better believe it.

GEORGE: I can't find a job, haven't been with a woman in months, and Kramer is working for the federal government.

*laughter*

KRAMER: What's this?

JERRY: What?

KRAMER: I just got an email from DOGE and it says I'm laid off effective immediately.

JERRY: But didn't you get hired last week?

KRAMER: Yeah, apparently they don't think I'm worthy of a position.

JERRY: But you've got a suit, a briefcase, and were just getting started.

KRAMER: I know, it's bewildering.

GEORGE: So what's in the briefcase?

KRAMER: Crackers.

*laughter*

JERRY: Yeah, that was an efficient use of government resources.

*laughter*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48706547)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 1st, 2025 10:26 PM
Author: Infuriating Double Fault



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48706600)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 8:54 AM
Author: Flirting Bisexual Rigor Orchestra Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707128)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 9:17 AM
Author: White Concupiscible Filthpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707157)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 9:27 AM
Author: Cheese-eating hilarious faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707162)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 9:28 AM
Author: heady dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707165)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 12:47 PM
Author: Iridescent shaky clown background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707631)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 12:50 PM
Author: deep very tactful athletic conference

I love this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707634)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 12:52 PM
Author: hairraiser honey-headed dilemma

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707641)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 1:12 PM
Author: Mint persian base



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48707707)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 4:45 PM
Author: At-the-ready Well-lubricated Locale Coldplay Fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48708226)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 9:00 PM
Author: Offensive disrespectful menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48708748)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 3rd, 2025 12:15 AM
Author: deep very tactful athletic conference



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48709169)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 3rd, 2025 8:55 PM
Author: outnumbered new version love of her life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48711669)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 4th, 2025 11:16 PM
Author: Pale Insanely Creepy Ticket Booth Sound Barrier



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48715789)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 1:54 PM
Author: Plum Point National Security Agency



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48724969)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 2:54 PM
Author: Sticky Pearly Nursing Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48725160)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 2:54 PM
Author: pink comical messiness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48725162)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 3:08 PM
Author: Flirting Bisexual Rigor Orchestra Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48725228)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 3:11 PM
Author: Turquoise spectacular cruise ship



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48725234)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 1st, 2025 11:01 PM
Author: Passionate Rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48706680)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 4:40 PM
Author: Passionate Rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48708213)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 8:56 PM
Author: doobsian khaki sex offender gas station

Excellent

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48708738)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2025 5:15 PM
Author: Trip snowy gaping



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48708272)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 3rd, 2025 12:10 AM
Author: Passionate Rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48709163)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 3rd, 2025 8:47 PM
Author: Passionate Rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48711651)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 3rd, 2025 9:15 PM
Author: Iridescent shaky clown background story

180. I was the OP btw.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48711701)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 4th, 2025 11:05 PM
Author: Passionate Rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48715763)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 12:10 PM
Author: deep very tactful athletic conference



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48724404)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 7th, 2025 12:38 PM
Author: outnumbered new version love of her life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#48724546)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 16th, 2025 1:02 AM
Author: evan39



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#49104881)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 16th, 2025 1:07 AM
Author: "im pumo now"



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5676099&forum_id=2/#49104886)