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very odd situation occurred at a wedding i was at last weekend

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked...
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Date: July 11th, 2022 8:42 PM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked maybe 5’2”, but then when i saw him closer i noticed he was wearing these giant “moon boots” (i don’t know what else to call them) with like 6 inch soles, so no way he was even five feet in his socks. anyway, he spent most of the reception in the corner hunched over his phone, typing like a maniac and then howling with laughter. most people tried to just ignore him.

when all the speeches and everything started he drew up to the crowd and stood next to me. i was struck by how beautiful his face was; basically like a garden gnome version of jared leto. he looked up and asked if this was “an emotional wedding.” i didn’t really understand what he meant, so just nodded to be polite and he did his crazy laugh again. then the bride and groom started the first dance and he totally lost it. later on everybody was trying to figure out what he meant by screaming “justice” as loud as he could while crying, but i was the closest to him and i would swear he was screaming “duchess,” even though that makes even less sense. he wouldn’t respond to anyone asking him to calm down or leave so one of the groomsmen simply picked him up from under his arms and carried him outside. i went outside later to smoke a cigarette and he was still there. he was sitting on the curb for about two minutes with me watching him and then, i shit you not, he somehow swung his tiny legs over a deer that had wandered by and rode off.

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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:38 PM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:40 PM
Author: pontificating ultramarine mood indian lodge



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:41 PM
Author: Cordovan patrolman theater



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Date: July 12th, 2022 12:15 AM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:13 PM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:17 PM
Author: dark dilemma electric furnace



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:21 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle silver property



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:39 PM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: Sticky station indirect expression



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: passionate godawful trump supporter



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:44 PM
Author: Contagious Codepig



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:50 PM
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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:09 PM
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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:20 PM
Author: Contagious Codepig

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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:37 PM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:39 PM
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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:40 PM
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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:41 PM
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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:14 AM
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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:17 AM
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Date: December 23rd, 2024 1:12 AM
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Date: June 2nd, 2025 10:24 AM
Author: khaki awkward gay wizard boiling water



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Date: June 15th, 2026 9:36 AM
Author: Robert Byrd Schitt



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