*you, 37, looking in mirror before wedding, 34 yr old match.com fiance awaits
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: January 25th, 2016 7:06 PM Author: Pearly state messiness
'we're Match.com compatible'
*wife brushes your arm, visible caustic burns and gangrene several days later*
ps: u died
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29678541) |
Date: January 25th, 2016 7:28 PM Author: comical garrison pervert
180 thread
greatness is rarely recognized in its own time
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29678706) |
Date: January 25th, 2016 9:22 PM Author: glassy bbw
Your fiance takes a deep breath and looks in the mirror.
The dress is beautiful (at $3,500, it had better be!). Her...well, she's having a harder time convincing herself. She's been all excited for this special day for months now, but now that it's here, it's just...all hitting her at once, you know? She used to give herself once last glance in the mirror when she was 19 before heading out to the frat parties to "have a good time"--man, what a hot young thing she was in that makeup and those dresses. The guys couldn't get enough of her!
Man, things were just...EASIER then, you know? When she graduated, she was ready to TAKE OVER the marketing world. Executive office, here she comes! But all those stepping stones she had mapped out in her head? They all seemed to go to someone else. Lauren from Product Development. Kelsey with the weird ears. And that bitch Erin. And the sum total of only one promotion and only two raises in twelve years really hits hard when she thinks about the 45, even 50-hour weeks she had to put in sometimes.
And she thought about all those dates she was having for all those years, and, man, did her shine-like-a-diamond optimism get stripped from her pretty quickly. She learned you just can't trust anybody. Throw yourself at them, or make them wait; tell them you love them, or play it cool--no matter what she does, it just seems like all those guys lied about really loving her before they...well, let's be real, they used her. But she's wiser now for it. She knows the world isn't all sunshine and rainbows, and that you have to be careful.
This moment is also the second time the name "Tyler Devine" is running through your fiance's head today. You don't know the name because she waved off your questions on the third date with "the past is the past," but he's the guy that's running through her head every couple of months when you catch her looking up from her magazine in bed and just staring at the wall. And yes, her answer to what she's thinking about will always be "nothing." They didn't work out, but, you know, everything happens for a reason. And she hasn't seen him in years, of course. She wonders what he's up to. She'll never mention this to you, but the last thing she does before heading out that door is look up his Facebook profile. He's held up really well, she thinks. Guess the girl in his profile picture is the lucky lady.
So okay, maybe this isn't the *conventional* path to how she got here. But she should feel lucky, right? After all, you're nice. You make a decent salary. You guys share some of the same hobbies. And she thinks you'd make a decent father one day, if, fingers crossed, everything is still a-okay in that department. I mean, OF COURSE she's lucky--you know, some women never find anyone at all.
One last deep breath.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29679746) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 12:12 PM Author: Abnormal Market
Damn, bro. You've got a hot doctor who's 5 years younger than you on your hands. Don't fuck this up because of your insecurities.
"You never know if the girl is thinking "he checks off enough boxes, I guess he will do." Because, of course, she probably is."
Unless you're marrying your college sweetheart when you're young and still all rosy-eyed about love, many marriage couplings boil down to (1) could we co-parent well together,(2) do we share enough common values and interests to fit into each other's lives without major compromises, and (3) do we enjoy sex with each other. If you're getting anything beyond that, you should consider yourself very lucky.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29683316) |
Date: January 26th, 2016 1:03 PM Author: amber parlor mad cow disease
"And the bride and groom have written their own vows?" the baritone woman in a suit speaks into her lapel mic, handing a wireless mic to the bride with a smile.
She trembles holding the mic, unfolding a slip of paper from her slightly calloused hands, stubbier than they were seven months ago, and less certain than they were seven hours ago.
"We have so much. So much to look to in the future. We have spent so much time without each other, but here we are. Together. Now. And it..."--she chokes here for a moment--"...will last because there is nothing greater than this love we shareatthismoment"--she hastens now, inexplicably, but the tears brimming in her eyes cue the crowd that it is justifiable--"...forever." She drops the paper; it flutters away in the breeze, as the din of a golf mower rises in the background from the seventeenth green.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29683667) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 7:24 PM Author: Cobalt Embarrassed To The Bone Mental Disorder Idiot
"the baritone woman in a suit speaks into her lapel mic"
"She drops the paper; it flutters away in the breeze, as the din of a golf mower rises in the background from the seventeenth green"
JFC
Wish you appeared in these sorts of threads more often friend
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29686616) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 5:20 PM Author: flatulent temple
It creeps up on you, it's so gradual that you really don't notice until things have gotten totally out of control. You try to focus on how awesome things were before this wedding nonsense and try to think about how things will be better after the wedding, it's a lifelong commitment, there are problems but who doesn't have problems, etc. etc.
For the most part, things are fine now, and I can't say that I'm regretful for marrying my wife. Things are pretty chill now. But the wedding process was miserable and the honeymoon was bullshit.
One thing that we don't do is really travel, and a lot of the reason was that the honeymoon was so crappy for me that I don't want to go anywhere with my Wife.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685641) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 5:11 PM Author: Abnormal Market
Jesus Christ.
I'm very, very sorry to hear that.
Why did you even go through with it? Do you love her? What was she like before you put the ring on her?
And no sex for 3 months? Was there at least oral? Like I can't imagine no sex for THREE FUCKING MONTHS.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685582) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 4:43 PM Author: Abnormal Market
I'm probably going to do a clunky job of explaining this analogy, but here goes.
Girls who are all about the wedding after getting married are like guys who are all about having sex after the first couple of dates. You WANT the girl to be excited about the wedding, just like a girl should WANT a guy to be physically attracted to her and want sex with her. BUT, you don't want sex/wedding to be what the first date/the marriage is all about.
Neither are desirable, but you're stupid and completely deluded if you think it's optimal to find a girl who ISN'T excited about the wedding. And weddings are a beast to plan.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685362) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 5:02 PM Author: Abnormal Market
Realistically, the kinds of girls who are most likely to be OK with small, casual weddings are (1) very young girls who don't have a lot of money and don't have parents who have a lot of money, (2) people who have children and don't want to spend $ on a wedding that could be going to their child, (3) introverts who dislike large parties and don't have a large circle of friends, (4) tomboys who have some masculine preferences and ways of thinking, and don't like the idea of getting dolled up for a frilly, poofy party, and (5) people on their second (or third, fourth, etc) marriage, had the blockbuster party, and have an "ain't nobody got time for that" attitude about the whole thing.
Single doods should limit their dating pool to these kinds of women if they want to limit their financial exposure re: wedding.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685528) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 5:20 PM Author: Abnormal Market
And a lot of doods who enjoy poasting on internet message boards tend to be introverts, so it's understandable that they would also not see the fun in a large, expensive party.
But don't shit on people who enjoy such things.
As for the "aging extrovert", I know quite a few of these folks who had big blockbuster first weddings that turned into 120 marriages, and very small second weddings because they were just done with the whole show and already had their "big day".
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685636) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 4:44 PM Author: Abnormal Market
Eloping is for people whose parents and friends don't approve of their wedding. If your parents and friends approve of the wedding, eloping serves no purpose and is kinda selfish.
And no one truly elopes these days. They may have some destination wedding somewhere with a small handful of people (or even just themselves), but then they have a major, blinged out party when they get back.
Of the couples I know who eloped, one was a green card marriage (parents didn't know and friends didn't approve), another was a situation where getting her boyfriend drunk in Vegas was the only way she'd get him to marry her, and the other was a normal, middle-income couple where the groom had a 10-year old child and they wanted to save $$$ (reasonable but atypical).
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685379) |
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Date: January 26th, 2016 5:42 PM Author: Abnormal Market
Even if you have a girl who totally hasn't bought into the wedding industrial complex, you're fighting against the tradition of having her father walk her down the aisle.
Now that my own wedding day is looking more and more like a 'when' and not an 'if', I like the idea of a small ceremony somewhere farflung and awesomely ridiculous over the stereotype wedding at someone's country club or a luxury hotel where the beef is tough and everyone's just waiting for the band to play Don't Stop Believing, just because of the cost savings and the lack of admin. I can't stand organizational clusterfucks and admin, and that's one way to suck the fun out of a party.
But my dad will be there to walk me down the aisle. That's what you're competing with if you just want a "two of us and a minister" setup.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685783) |
Date: January 26th, 2016 4:25 PM Author: lemon yapping feces
Toxic..,,flame? No, hits too close to reality for many
BRB going to go nowig, become a monk, move to bhutan
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#29685217) |
Date: January 3rd, 2017 9:13 AM Author: Heady hilarious space boistinker
mods
no matter what i'll never date a chick with a kid so at least there's that
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#32287873) |
Date: January 23rd, 2017 4:50 PM Author: rambunctious zombie-like scourge upon the earth
In all seriousness, why is that bad?
First, the kid happened before she met you, so you weren't cucked.
Second, you get to experience the fun years but pass on the diaper years.
Besides, if you're an XO poster, you probably (a) are smart enough to recognize the silliness about caring whether a child is biologically "yours" as ridiculous, because there's so much randomness already, and (b) have mental illness genes that are better off not passed on.
As long as the kid's not carrying low-IQ Chad Thundercock genes (and the thread said previous marriage, not ONS) it sounds like a winning play.
A kid from an ONS is probably a deal-breaker, though. No way that kid is getting into any schools.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#32440839) |
Date: April 2nd, 2017 5:55 AM Author: awkward round eye
If you're gonna get married, you need to have the ability to semi pick your girl at will to get to know.
If you can't do this, you probably won't ever get enough data to make informed choice.
Don't get married.
Most people should never be married
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#32974083) |
Date: December 26th, 2017 3:27 PM Author: sadistic background story ceo
Lol dude. Marrying in your 20s isnt all what its cracked up to be. I have about 3 cousins who married when they were 22-24. I lol at them. They hid for YEARS the abusive, nightmarish marriages they were in, because they wanted everyone to believe they were living the 180 life: young, married, happily ever after.
Several years later they finally confessed what they'd been through. One of them tried to kill self twice and became an alcoholic (this is the hottest one). Her husband was a lawyer and took pics of her drunk and puking and had an entire collection ready to be used for child custody. Started a FB page about how he was not allowed to see his own kid. Unbelievable shit. The other 2 are single moms now.
Gave the best years of their lives to crazy ass husbands.
But appearances will be appearances and some people will defend them till the day they die. These ppl I'm talking about were FB megapoasters and poasted every second of "happy" moments they had until it was clear it was all fake. LJL.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#35011392) |
Date: January 17th, 2019 12:12 PM Author: bespoke keepsake machete
Never got the fedora post ITT. Otherwise, 180 content creation.
For anyone who ended up or will end up in this position— lol @ you!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#37608100) |
Date: April 9th, 2019 5:59 AM Author: henna sick senate
thread is like me, except it's 27 y/o me marrying a 34 y/o wife
just kidding, i'll be 26!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#38061250) |
Date: June 3rd, 2019 10:23 AM Author: Slimy internet-worthy skinny woman
I have printed this thread and added it to the "book" to be delivered to my son when he turns 17 should I die before that time.
Good luck all.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#38331857) |
Date: October 13th, 2023 12:24 PM Author: White Circlehead Electric Furnace
all time thread.
xo used to get 500 posts threads that were mostly orig content, with multiple 100 plus subthreads. 180
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3108095&forum_id=2],#46930507) |
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