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HYPO: Ronaldo free kicks from 50 yards, you are goalie. Each missed goal = $1mm
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Date: June 13th, 2026 10:15 AM Author: the discombobulator For context, here's a 40 yard free kick from "years" ago that a pro can't stop. https://m.youtube.com/shorts/JKnFHJFf4AE
He has 11 kicks from straight on, 50 yards out, no other players on the pitch except you in goal wearing standard goalie kit. If he scores no more than 5 goals, you get $23 million taxed as ordinary income. If he gets 6 goals or more, you have to work until age 70 going into office 5 days/week wearing dress shirt and tie, max 2 weeks vacation, and will have to live in the northern great plains states in retirement on a max $55k/year, no other accumulating assets or using ur wife's vacation home or other shit.
If you accept, you are transplanted to standard local college pitch and Ronaldo starts kicking in 10 minutes. Do you take the hypo |
Date: June 13th, 2026 11:08 AM Author: COCKazn (✅🍑) under no circumstances do I take this, no no NO big fat hard NO (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935545) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:50 AM Author: concern boner so i either get 23 million or lose my virginity to a wife? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935597) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:52 AM Author: Hodd Toward (🧐) So either I get 23 million or a guaranteed retirement even when nobody else has a job in 30 years? Sounds cr (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935599) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:57 AM Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935617) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:54 AM Author: esoteric sambo I'd sooner let a child take 5 potshots at me from 100 yds using ironsights (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935607) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 11:57 AM Author: Fucking Fuckface 50 yards seems pretty far. I am leaning yes but need to see how big a goal is and if I can jump high enough to cover the upper region
Straight male here. Obviously don't watch or know anything about soccer |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:04 PM Author: Fucking Fuckface Just looked it up. Sign me up to defend the goal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935632) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:06 PM Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935641) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:06 PM Author: Bellevue therapy dog tp Straight male here tp (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935640) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:08 PM Author: concern boner 6’4” Jamaican National Team goalie couldn’t do it: https://youtu.be/E-4MNTyn7yU (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935646) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 1:08 PM Author: Fucking Fuckface Struggling with whether I should feel murderous rage to be compared to a Jamaican or exquisite bliss to be compared to a 6'4" motherfucker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935843) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:16 PM Author: Big Bear Energy What’s in it for Ronaldo? If nothing, I can see him getting bored and not trying that hard. If there’s a camera on him or there’s a check on the line, he’d score 45/50. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935666) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 12:23 PM Author: esoteric sambo excellent reading comprehension lolyer (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49935683) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 9:09 PM Author: Nazca Redlines (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49936820) |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 7:34 PM Author: which dad? Seeing him hit that rocket at 40 yards is scary, but 50 yards is AT LEAST 10 yards farther, and he's 40 years old now. The 50 yard example above is a fluke. If he is targeting the upper corners, he's gonna doink or miss at least a couple. Otherwise even the baldest xo bro could splay out and block half of these. Plus those goalie gloves are big.
I'm IN. |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 9:12 PM Author: Nazca Redlines Good Hypo. Downside is too bad, so I'm out.
But, I think success would be very well within the realm of possibility. Most of the long goals in irl high level soccer are because the goalie didn't expect a shot on goal or he got screened and couldn't track the ball. Neither would be factors here. Ronaldo likely misses a couple, and I could block at least a couple. |
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Date: June 13th, 2026 9:31 PM Author: Mcp 100% take it. You’ll have nearly 2 seconds to react to each shot from 50 yards out. Goal is about7 yards wide. Plenty of time to react and cover. He’ll probably not put 2 on frame, so you’ve realistically have to defend 9 shots. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5873769&forum_id=2],#49936876) |