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Anyone know who the Biglaw Biter is?

Vampire or Biglaw summer associate? You be the judge. Thi...
Big kitchen police squad
  07/17/25
where is the cleary diver these days
Opaque aphrodisiac lettuce famous landscape painting
  07/17/25
Can smoeone not at Above the Law write this story.
Bronze odious party of the first part ratface
  07/17/25
wtf, this gave me nostalgia for the good ol' days. I have s...
Razzmatazz flirting headpube
  07/20/25
just waybackarchive the biglaw reddit thread
Gaped brunch jap
  07/17/25
The New York Post has picked up the story. https://nypost...
embarrassed to the bone umber piazza trust fund
  07/19/25
"The bites were not “in an aggressive, ‘we&...
Big kitchen police squad
  07/20/25
why dont they link picture? all important ?
Violet Erotic Corner Electric Furnace
  07/20/25
she's probably ugly AF only reason she was canned
Gaped brunch jap
  07/20/25
She got to like 10 bites dude. This is going to be a smokes...
Big kitchen police squad
  07/22/25
some rice paddy peasant slobbering all over your armani suit
Gaped brunch jap
  07/22/25
Expect more of this, now that summer classes are Gen Z.
naked hominid
  07/20/25
She sounds hot
Glittery zippy rigor hell
  07/20/25
https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/ouch-sidley-intern...
Razzmatazz flirting headpube
  07/20/25
nothing in the rules ...
Dun exciting temple
  07/20/25
Picked up by the XO Daily Mail. https://www.dailymail.co.uk...
Sick center
  07/21/25
...
fantasy-prone idiot point
  07/22/25
...
fantasy-prone idiot point
  07/22/25
LAW BITES LAW BLEEDS IT'S BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES
cerebral knife
  07/22/25
i love vampyres
Cerise motley dilemma
  07/22/25


Poast new message in this thread



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Date: July 17th, 2025 9:27 PM
Author: Big kitchen police squad

Vampire or Biglaw summer associate? You be the judge.

This is a story you’re really going to chew on for a while. A Sidley summer associate in the New York office who we’ll refer to as Biglaw Biter (for reasons that will soon be apparent) was let go after a series of incidents with other employees. What happened you ask? She bit other people at work. You are not reading this incorrectly: a Biglaw summer associate bit people at the firm — with her teeth.

(For the record, before settling on the alliterative Biglaw Biter as the summer’s code name, we did consider Sidley Masticator, Scrumptious Summer, Champion Chomper, Mike Tyson of Biglaw, and the close runner-up, Associate Lecter.)

According to insiders at the firm, pretty much from the start of the summer, the Biglaw Biter started chomping away at other employees at Sidley Gnaw-stin — not in an aggressive, “we’re beefing” way, but more of a faux-quirky manic pixie dream girl crossed with the Donner party vibe. But like, you’re in NYC for the summer — if you want to get your kicks by biting people, there are more consensual ways to do it.

The final chomp-count is thought to be in the double digits — which is an awfully long time for the nibbling to continue. (Though I’ve seen pics of the results post-Biglaw Biter, and “nibble” is probably too tame a word. No one should have marks on their person after an interaction with a co-worker in Biglaw — emotional and psychological scars only!) It’s unclear why so many people let this go before reporting the Biglaw Biter, but the rumor is she’s otherwise personable and there was some reluctance to elevate the matter.

It’s just wild that this happened in Biglaw. A single bite is enough to get a toddler written up in an incident report from daycare. And if the biting goes on 10+ times? That’ll get you kicked out of daycare.

And Biglaw too, as it happens.

Not since the aughts have I heard a tale of such out-of-pocket summer associate behavior. There were strip club visits (Opens in a new window)and expense accounts gone wild (Opens in a new window), but obviously, the classic of the genre is Aquagirl (Opens in a new window). Above the Law has long referred to her exploits as the bar for summer associate behavior (though the Biglaw Biter just might take the crown). For those that were in their preschool biting phase back in 2006, Aquagirl (Opens in a new window)was a Cleary summer associate who drunkenly stripped down to her underwear at an event at Chelsea Piers and jumped into the Hudson River. Ultimately she had to be rescued in a boat — but still ended the summer with an offer.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110557)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2025 9:32 PM
Author: Opaque aphrodisiac lettuce famous landscape painting

where is the cleary diver these days

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110566)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2025 9:39 PM
Author: Bronze odious party of the first part ratface

Can smoeone not at Above the Law write this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110577)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 20th, 2025 4:06 PM
Author: Razzmatazz flirting headpube

wtf, this gave me nostalgia for the good ol' days. I have so many stories of summer associate drama that basically went extinct as the programs shrank and the only people that got one of these were the most risk-averse of the risk-averse.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116817)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2025 9:53 PM
Author: Gaped brunch jap

just waybackarchive the biglaw reddit thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110626)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2025 10:55 AM
Author: embarrassed to the bone umber piazza trust fund

The New York Post has picked up the story.

https://nypost.com/2025/07/19/us-news/cannibalistic-intern-fired-from-nyc-law-firm-for-biting-up-to-ten-coworkers-report/

The firm declined to comment. But an insider told The Post the intern bit only five employees and that exaggerations were now flooding the internet.

“People are outright making things up at this point,” echoed a Reddit user who claimed to work with the masticator at Sidley.

“I just want to ask people to please remember that there’s a human being on the other end of this story — someone whose mental health is a genuine concern, and who is probably feeling like her life is ruined right now,” the July 11 post continued. “She made a really stupid mistake and has paid the price for it.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49114152)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 3:31 PM
Author: Big kitchen police squad

"The bites were not “in an aggressive, ‘we’re beefing’ way” – but rather, “a faux-quirky manic pixie dream girl crossed with the Donner party vibe,” the outlet reported.

“It’s unclear why so many people let this go before reporting the Biglaw Biter, but the rumor is she’s otherwise personable and there was some reluctance to elevate the matter,” the outlet reported, citing unnamed sources.

-----

Honestly, she sounds cute af. I'm thinking like a 30 years' younger Amy C. Barrett.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116771)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 20th, 2025 3:48 PM
Author: Violet Erotic Corner Electric Furnace

why dont they link picture? all important ?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116793)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 20th, 2025 4:09 PM
Author: Gaped brunch jap

she's probably ugly AF

only reason she was canned

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116823)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:36 PM
Author: Big kitchen police squad

She got to like 10 bites dude. This is going to be a smokeshow.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121712)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 1:05 PM
Author: Gaped brunch jap

some rice paddy peasant slobbering all over your armani suit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121813)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 20th, 2025 4:00 PM
Author: naked hominid

Expect more of this, now that summer classes are Gen Z.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116806)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:10 PM
Author: Glittery zippy rigor hell

She sounds hot

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116824)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 20th, 2025 4:10 PM
Author: Razzmatazz flirting headpube

https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/ouch-sidley-intern-expelled-biting

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116825)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:15 PM
Author: Dun exciting temple

nothing in the rules ...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116834)



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Date: July 21st, 2025 3:53 PM
Author: Sick center

Picked up by the XO Daily Mail.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14922813/summer-associate-fired-law-firm-biting-colleagues-newyork.html

CSLG - Try to get on Matt Gaetz's show to discuss this one.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49119410)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:36 AM
Author: fantasy-prone idiot point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49120533)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:03 PM
Author: fantasy-prone idiot point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121599)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:37 PM
Author: cerebral knife

LAW BITES

LAW BLEEDS

IT'S BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121716)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:49 PM
Author: Cerise motley dilemma

i love vampyres

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121759)