I cannot find any of his posts via google.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5115019)

Author: Melungeon

Dear Sirs,

Early in the Boer War, when it appeared that the glorious lobster would be ever victorious, I ran across an uncouth lout in an almost identical situation to that of the erstwhile BigTex. I came across him about a mile South of West Johannesburg. In the midst of a circle of angry Boers, I saw a rather thick young man with two longish staffs crying and attempting to speak some dialect of Dutch. I immediately took him for an Englishman, but, between sobs, it seemed that he was claiming that, while he was of English ancestory, his father had been cuckolded by a particularly virile Boer. It seems that this Boer had then ejected the thick, young man's father from his household and taken over the duties as the head of the household. From that point on, the young man claimed to have acquired many of the habits of an ill-bred Dutchmen whose ancestors had migrated to the dark continent in order to avoid debtors prison. By this time, the mob of true Boers was becoming incensed and began to pelt him with rocks and other small debris from the roadway. In a last, and hauntingly pitiful display, the thick young man attempted to demonstrate his Boerish nature by jabbering in broken dutch and attempting to mine copper and other minerals from a ditch near the highway! Sent over the edge by this poor imitation of a Boer, the mob set on him, casting aside his staffs and instantly killing the oaf. The thick young man learned about assimilation that day!!!

I remain,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=350148&forum_id=2#4957406)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5115628)

I must say I got a resounding chortle out of this caper! It reminds me of an incident that occured somewhere about three leagues South by Southwest of the Great Pyrenees in my ale-sodden youth. I was attending a ball thrown by one of the lesser Bourbons who was decidedly out of fashion with the more enlightened set. I had decided to risk any potential harm to my good name and reputation and attend in hopes of wooing some poor serving girl. Such were the lusty days of youth!!

In any event, I was not displeased with the event. Of course, being one of the more vulgar affairs of the season, there was a fair amount of voluble trumpeting regarding the finery and victuals, not all of them off base mind you. Being that war was afoot, plum duff took up more than its fair share of the meal, though the quail was superior. And joy of joys, the end of the main courses included a single ortolan for each guest. I was extremely tickled and ingested the delicacy with cloth over face in the proper manner. It was quite the gastronimical delight!

Of course, one foolish brigand in the back of the room, by all appearances some sort of half-ape caught in the wilds of Borneo, rejected his first and second courses. When the entree was being served he refused to enjoy, and insulted the hostess by insisiting that be allowed to continue eating the plum duff. Fool! The evening surely was ruined! But no, the lesser Bourbon was a might cleverer that her honorific suggested! She insisted that the fool continue with the duff. And continue he did. When the final courses of flumeries and sillabubs were served, the fool was offered only more plum duff! He learned about too much of a good thing that night!

I remain, as always,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=363758&forum_id=2#5140811)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5143318)

thanks for thanking the great one for us, fajitas.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5147881)

Author: Melungeon

Dear Sir,

I must object to you fallacious characterization of the venerable institution Stroock, Stroock and Lavan. No class of person views this firm as subpar. It is noted for its impressive heritage and legendary marketing among the most elite circles of solicitors, and some of the better barristers (though one cannot hold account for the opinion of barristers).

I would thank you to not to mention this mistaken observation again, as I find it upsetting in the extreme and the time for my afternoon luncheon is drawing nigh.

I remain, as ever,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=371730&forum_id=2#5234672)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5235753)

I noticed a big resemblance in their writing in Nasc's thread about how to become the ultimate gunner.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#5236567)

Author: Melungeon

Dear Sirs:

I once found myself in a precarious situation involving a wench of ill repute. A large shipment of exotic spices financed by my firm had come into port in the early afternoon. I was very pleased with the cargo, and after my inspection, I decided to carouse with a band of sailors in an ale house at the dockyard. All of the sailors spoke of the wondrous delights that a certain woman of Irish descent provided for a nominal fee. Intrigued, I approached her and made her acquaintance. She invited me to her rooms and I, being quite tight, accepted her gracious invitation. Once there, it became apparent that the woman was nothing more than a common whore! Fretting about potential damage to my personal reputation, I struck her about the shoulders and head with my walking stick. That was the last time she bamboozled an innocent gentlman carousing in that dockyard, I assure you!

I remain, as ever,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=319110&forum_id=2#4557190)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#9101484)

ty.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#9101515)

Author: Melungeon

Dear Sir:

Your casual demeanor towards becoming not only a "kept slut," but a "sodomite kept slut" is disturbing and shocking. I am of the opinion that you are somewhat depraved and undeserving of introduction into polite society. Please do not request such an invitation from me, for I shall be forced to refuse.

I remain, as always,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=318933&forum_id=2#4549889)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#9236587)

Author: Melungeon

Dear Sir:

I have oft traveled down the road of the unanswered postal missive. At one juncture in my early years, I desired to learn the valued and honored profession of iron mongering. In all earnest zeal, I dashed off several notes to the most honoured iron mongers in the region. When they did not return the favour, I had little choice but to repeat my earlier labours. Finally, having become frustrated and melancholy, I chose the risky route of presenting myself to these esteemed mongers with no introduction. I chose the monger with the meekest reputation and took the liberty of walking into his place of work with no warning. A grizzled old sot looked up at me from a blazing furnance and inquired my purpose. I replied that I wished to commence study under him in order to acquire the skills of a master iron monger. The man was immediately enraged and began to hurl molten steel in my direction. Luckily the noble monger was nearly crippled and his missles were not accurate. A dollop of slag whizzed six feet to my right and landed on his only daughter's fair proboscis, disfiguring the unortunate child for life. I learned that the life of the iron monger was not for me that day!

I remain, as always,

Very Truly Yours,

Melungeon

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=319641&forum_id=2#4560806)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=362464&forum_id=2#9236614)