AKA “The Great Garrett Underpants”

3/26/13 – 7/6/18

My name is: Garrett Michael Boofias

My birthday is: I am 5 years old

My address is: I am a Bulldog!

My favorite color is: Blue….and Red and Black and Green

My favorite superhero is: Batman…and Thor, Iron Man, the Hulk and Cyborg

When I grow up: I’m going to be a professional boxer

My favorite people are:

• Mommy, Daddy, my sister ‘Delcina’ (Delphina),

• The grandparents with the new house (Fredric and Cheryl Krueger),

• The grandparents with the camper (Daniel and Nita Matthias),

• My cousins: Grady, ‘that guy I took down that one time’ (Luke), and London Marie,

• My Auntie Janette and Stinky Uncle Andy (Andrew and Janette Krueger),

• Those two guys, you know, my uncles (Kristopfer Krueger and James Taylor)

• Batman!!

The things I love the most: Playing with my sister, my blue bunny, thrash metal, Legos, my daycare friends, Batman and when they put me to sleep before they access my port

Things I hate: Pants!, dirty stupid cancer, when they access my port, needles, and the monkey nose that smells like cherry farts…I do like the mint monkey nose like at Mayo Radiation and that one guy that helped me build Legos (Randy)

When I die: I am going to be a gorilla and throw poo at Daddy!

Burned or Buried: I want to be burned (like when Thor’s Mommy died) and made into a tree so I can live in it when I’m a gorilla

Big or Small Funeral: Funerals are sad: I want 5 bouncy houses (because I’m 5), Batman, and snow cones

Emilie and Ryan Matthias will honor Garrett’s final wishes by having a Celebration of Life on Saturday, July 14th from 5pm – 11pm at 2377 132nd Ct Van Meter, Iowa

Note: Symbolic Asgardian burial ceremony and fireworks will be held just after sunset

A private burial of Garrett’s ashes will be held at a later time once his parents figure out how the hell to get his ashes made into a tree and locate a nature preserve, so his tree resides in a protected area.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36418340)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36421231)

Sounds Trumpian

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36418376)

Things I hate: Pants!, dirty stupid cancer, when they access my port,

what is his port?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36418442)

you can't keep something like that a secret

like if the cure exists, that means there are people who have been cured by it - did they execute all of those test subjects, and successfully cover up all those executions (hundreds, likely)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36422948)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_qrMCUY7x3fU/TI5Y4OEPFTI/AAAAAAAACAo/SCXcf8ngavw/s1600/IMG_0219.JPG

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36419826)

https://imgur.com/a/oU0ymfZ

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36419783)

I lost a lot of my good hospital and cancer camp friends growing up. Carried a lot of guilt with me for years. If I had been diagnosed just a few a couple of years earlier I would have been, at best, an amputee, but more likely, dead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36419908)

The girl I had my first sexual experience with (handjob/fingering) when I was 13, was in remission for four years when it returned and killed her. :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36421367)

unreal how much bullshit and pain he had to deal with for no good reason while most Americans eventually eat themselves to death because they have no self-discipline

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420487)

If you get yourself killed, you deserve it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420783)

Was honestly kind of on the fence because it's painful and shit, but this is a sign and 100% persuaded me to do it. I'd have to be a complete asshole to not potentially save some kid with leukemia just because of some mildly invasive and uncomfortable procedure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420614)

can you describe how one goes about becoming a donor?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420651)

I don't care, potentially saving a life would be enough

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420712)

obviously you go under for the procedure, but there is a lingering ache for like 2-3 weeks after

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420890)

what the FUCK

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36422975)

Um...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420720)

don't you need positive karma to be reincarnated into a higher lifeform?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36422980)

it's human nature. don't try to *correct* it. work in harmony with it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420828)

I would feel the same if he was the child of two gay illegal immigrant dads

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4024908&forum_id=2#36420851)