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Fucking Azn HR Cunt Stole My Jalapeno Bagel
| Lemon Sandwich Brethren | 07/03/15 |
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:28 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren My paralegal specifically gets me a jalapeno bagel every Friday for our meeting. They were out of the regular jalapeno bagels so my paralegal got me a cheese jalapeno one which has melted cheddar on top. It is fucking delicious. Then I see the azn HR cunt (the one who instituted this new internet policy at our firm, the same one who takes photos of her cappuccinos) eating it.
I ask her if she's eating my bagel and she ignores me. So then I flat out accuse her of stealing it and she goes, "You know what? It doesn't matter."
As I was typing the last paragraph she comes into my office and offers me some candy or something. I say, "Is this your way of apologizing for stealing my bagel?"
She goes, "No, I'm not apologzing. I got there first. Now I'm not offering you the candy anymore."
What a fucking cunt. Fuming right now bros. And I'm hungry. |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:30 AM Author: Adventurous Internal Respiration you got pa pa pa poaned (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251312) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:30 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren God dammit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251316) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:31 AM Author: multi-colored up-to-no-good macaca piazza (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251317) |
Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:30 AM Author: vibrant henna feces you know what? it doesn't matter. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251315) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:31 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren FUCK YOU (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251319) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 12:57 PM Author: Galvanic startled roommate resort lol'd irl at this (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707128) |
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Date: November 9th, 2018 1:23 PM Author: Frisky Mexican (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#37198069) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:31 AM Author: irradiated cerise locus foreskin lol what are u gonna do about it? complain to HR? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251318) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:13 PM Author: Bronze Striped Hyena Market (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294769) |
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Date: September 1st, 2015 4:14 PM Author: twisted library crotch 180 lulz (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28668866) |
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Date: September 3rd, 2015 10:46 PM Author: boyish gay wizard ladyboy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28685025) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 3:56 PM Author: Scarlet filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29708257) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:31 AM Author: irradiated cerise locus foreskin chillimattta: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHHZBmF8mk4 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251327) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:33 AM Author: beady-eyed rigpig Next time, tell your paralegaless to put EXTRA SPICY CHILIS on the jalapeno bagel so when HR feminazi comes to liquidate it, she gets PWND with dat spicy revenge!!! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251339) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:39 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren I like this idea. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251366) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:41 AM Author: hideous theater stage cuckold killself you beta faggot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251377) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:42 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Rude (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251380) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:51 AM Author: Sooty puppy house Photo of the event: http://realestatecrm.biz/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/office-space-milton-cake.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251429) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:51 AM Author: contagious shrine this thread is fucking worthless without ethnicity (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251432) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:53 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren She's Korean. I just complained to my boss. He offered to go get me a new bagel. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251452) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:00 PM Author: contagious shrine shocking that she wasn't CHINK.
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:05 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren My paralegal told me a story about her at one of the firm Xmas parties. The azn HR girl wanted my paralegal's white elephant gift and traded with my paralegal for the azn girl's bottle of wine.
It was a decent bottle of wine. The azn HR girl took one of the cheap bottles of wine that were placed on all the tables, replaced the good bottle of wine with it, and gave the shit wine to my paralegal who didn't notice until after she got home. When my paralegal confonted her about it the girl defended herself by saying my paralegal was drunk and should have noticed. |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:13 PM Author: Provocative maroon faggot firefighter you know what, that doesn't matter either (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251549) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:21 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren (Azn HR cunt) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251592) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:33 PM Author: khaki cruise ship jfc what a bitch
at this TTT consulting place I worked there was an ex-military wigger w a bunch of kids who would put a $10 gift card in a big box and wrap it |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:34 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251672) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 11:53 AM Author: White hilarious toaster all HR is SHIT OUT MY ASS (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251444) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:24 PM Author: Passionate aqua garrison useless brakes Take her food out of the fridge next time. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251612) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:27 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Update: I ate an everything bagel. While I'm eating it my boss and paralegal walk into the breakroom. My paralegal says, "Not the same, is it?"
It is not the same, bros. Not the same at all. |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:28 PM Author: charismatic poppy nibblets scourge upon the earth I'm confused. Jalapneo cheese was NOT too spicy? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251633) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:28 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Apparently not. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251639) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:29 PM Author: vibrant henna feces doesn't matter. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251646) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:40 PM Author: beady-eyed rigpig https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7JsLtcEAF4 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251715) |
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Date: July 3rd, 2015 12:42 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28251719) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:04 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Update: the HR girl forwarded the email chain to the Office Manager who is her direct supervisor. He sent me a shitty ass email "Let's get some things straight . . ." and then he tells me (a) that she was not tasked with sending in my certification and that she is only tasked with doing things that he himself approves and (b) I should know better as an attorney that there is a "certain level of respect" I need to show colleagues and to come to him if I have a problem.
I replied to this motherfucker saying that MY boss (who is also his boss) tasked her with it and if he has a problem to take it up with him (cc'd boss).
Then I basically told him that she's a disrespectful little cunt and I'm not going to put up with that shit from her or anyone else.
So there is now a meeting schedule tomorrow where my boss is going to mediate the dispute between me and this fucking cuntrag. I'm going to tear her head off tomorrow. |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:09 PM Author: Big dilemma circlehead All this because of a bagel? You have issues. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294730) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:37 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren A jalapeno cheese bagel, faggot, not a normal bagel. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294935) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:42 PM Author: Shaky Spectacular Abode it's not even really about the bagel. It's just flat out rude to steal someone's food. Hope that bitch gets GOT (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294975) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:45 PM Author: Stubborn wonderful love of her life indirect expression no way this works. if she is Korean then she will cry as soon as she gets GOT. Then OP looks like a aspie complaining about a 99 cent bagel. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294997) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:57 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren It isn't about the bagel. The bagel started it. This is what blew it up:
http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2930004&mc=14&forum_id=2
Edit: and jalapeno cheese bagels are AT LEAST 25 cents more. |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:10 PM Author: contagious shrine credited, but keep in mind, korean women are crazy. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294742) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:11 PM Author: Bat-shit-crazy temple i just remembered why I retired. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294748) |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:11 PM Author: crimson whorehouse let it go bro
dont make a big deal out of it. just tell her you want her to respect your boundaries and move on |
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Date: July 9th, 2015 9:40 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Shit, I forgot I did a follow up thread. I should have bumped that one. This isn't about the bagel. My boss accidentally forwarded her an email in which I referred to her having a "shitty fucking attitude". That's what this is about. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28294953) |
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Date: July 10th, 2015 2:27 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren We had a guest speaker at our Friday morning meeting today and this dude brought bagels with him. He brought *one* cheddar cheese bagel (no jalapenos). Guess who fucking ate it? I kept my mouth shut today though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28300011) |
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Date: August 27th, 2015 2:45 AM Author: Pungent adulterous fanboi spot Azn HR cunt is foolishly waging a war against me and my paralegal
http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2974074&forum_id=2 |
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Date: August 27th, 2015 3:29 AM Author: Dark stage selfie This is hilarious. So at an office meeting/breakfast, from a breakfast spread of many bagels, someone who arrived before you did happened to take THE bagel that you wanted, that was included on the platter and not set aside for you? And instead of just getting another bagel you throw a fit? This sounds like classic Jim/Dwight dynamic. You're Dwight.
Why doesn't your paralegal get more than one of your flavor of bagel OR set aside your bagel so that it is not on display for general consumption? |
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Date: August 27th, 2015 3:43 AM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren You don't understand. The admin team are passive-aggressive aspies. After this incident, my paralegal would put my bagel in a special bag and write my name on it. The office manager ate it. I knew that was his way of defending the cunt. He wanted me to react, but I didn't. Instead I filed him under "Enemy". (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28634958) |
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Date: August 30th, 2015 1:26 AM Author: Motley orange dingle berry This is insane. Tell us more about office manager pls. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28652958) |
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Date: September 1st, 2015 4:17 PM Author: Curious Rose Hell Which did he eat- the bag or the bagel? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28668887) |
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Date: September 3rd, 2015 10:48 PM Author: Pink lascivious institution (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28685041) |
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Date: September 1st, 2015 4:13 PM Author: Slate fortuitous meteor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#28668854) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 12:48 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Bros, the new fat paralegal stole my bagel this morning. I had to send an email to everyone.
"[My paralegal] buys two jalapeno cheese bagels every week: one for me and one for [azn hr cunt]. If you want a jalapeno cheese bagel, please let [paralegal] know and she will *special* order one for you so you don't have to *steal* mine (please see California Penal Code section 459). Now my entire Friday is *ruined* thanks to you."
Fucking bullshit. |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 12:57 PM Author: Mischievous nursing home quadroon This is actually more of a 488/490.5, but I stand with you brother. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707126) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 1:02 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren She entered the building with the intent to deprive me of my bagel. How dare you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707168) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 1:08 PM Author: Galvanic startled roommate resort This is really elaborate flame, or you are 100% beta as fuck, bro. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707232) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 1:20 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren (Guy who has never had a jalapeno cheese bagel) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707313) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 1:21 PM Author: Galvanic startled roommate resort You're a lawyer, right? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29707316) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 3:54 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Maybe. Why do you ask? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29708245) |
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Date: January 29th, 2016 3:58 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren New associate in my office asked me whether my email was serious or not. My boss looked at him and with a straight face says, "People have been killed over that bagel. [Chilmata] is Sicilian." Not flame. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29708261) |
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Date: January 30th, 2016 1:28 AM Author: Trip flirting windowlicker affirmative action 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#29711669) |
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Date: May 14th, 2016 1:37 AM Author: titillating jade office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#30475619) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 11:52 AM Author: titillating jade office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228820) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:04 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren I see. Kihote's been making the azn hr cunt threads under this moniker. Now I get it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228848) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:05 PM Author: titillating jade office ? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228850) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:06 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren ITS YOU! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228857) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:07 PM Author: titillating jade office I'm chandler (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228863) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:07 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren I know, faggot. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228864) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:17 PM Author: Histrionic lay So how did this whole fiasco conclude? Did u bash that cunt's face in? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228926) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:19 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren Long story, bro. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228934) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:22 PM Author: Histrionic lay I would have done some Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan type shit and hired a hitman. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31228950) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 12:31 PM Author: Learning Disabled Mind-boggling National Sex Offender He now buys her a bagel every Friday and has to sit and watch her eat it. Total victory by HR GURL. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31229014) |
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Date: August 20th, 2016 1:06 PM Author: pearly theatre keepsake machete (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#31229212) |
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Date: January 24th, 2017 5:54 PM Author: titillating jade office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#32450132) |
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Date: January 24th, 2017 6:16 PM Author: Lemon Sandwich Brethren I remember this like it was yesterday. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#32450283) |
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Date: June 21st, 2017 1:10 AM Author: titillating jade office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#33607049) |
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Date: November 9th, 2018 1:14 PM Author: Supple Address (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#37198003) |
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Date: November 9th, 2018 1:17 PM Author: titillating jade office One of the most famous posts in history and only 70 some replies (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#37198022) |
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Date: January 13th, 2020 10:03 PM Author: titillating jade office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#39426494) |
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Date: March 19th, 2021 5:32 PM Author: Supple Address (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#42133131) |
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Date: December 8th, 2021 10:50 PM Author: Concupiscible mauve regret (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2925783&forum_id=2#43581383) |