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Eulogist at a Christian funeral. Recommended Scripture?

I'm not a Christian, but the service will be and I'm giving ...
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
pretty sure the eulogy is not a reading from scripture. unle...
Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum
  05/13/12
I know that. I wanted a short passage to introduce (or mayb...
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
if this is a religious funeral, there will be a pastor or so...
Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum
  05/13/12
Yeah, I know that. I just wanted a short quotation to buttr...
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
and it would be kind of lame for a non-christian to quote sc...
Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum
  05/13/12
WTF? Non-Christians quote Scripture all the time.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
Look, this is a stupid idea. You'll probably end up quoting ...
Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum
  05/13/12
That's why I'm taking recommendations from more knowledgeabl...
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
Something from Hosea?
Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed
  05/13/12
Not familiar with that. Any particular passages?
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Hosea%201:2&...
Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed
  05/13/12
Fuck you.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis%2012:11-...
Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed
  05/13/12
so he gave his wife up to be raped to save himself?
hyperactive scarlet base karate
  05/13/12
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis%2020:1-2...
Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed
  05/13/12
Knock it off.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2%20Samuel%2016:...
Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed
  05/13/12
just do rape your father's slaves in public to humiliate him...
hyperactive scarlet base karate
  05/13/12
just do pimp your wife bro
hyperactive scarlet base karate
  05/13/12
180
hyperactive scarlet base karate
  05/13/12
_____ was like a brother to me. And when I say brother, I do...
Ocher bawdyhouse
  05/13/12
Fuck the fuck off.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
http://etext.virginia.edu/etcbin/toccer-new2?id=KjvPsal.sgm&...
slippery location french chef
  05/13/12
ty I think I'll use this.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
make sure to find out which version of the bible the church/...
slippery location french chef
  05/13/12
Episcopalian?
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
Ecclesiastes
Vigorous awkward kitty cat circlehead
  05/13/12
Any specific passages?
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
Dust in the wind, brother
sexy disrespectful cuck range
  05/13/12
Ecclesiastes is deep stuff. American 20th-century novel...
Ruddy thriller crackhouse
  05/13/12
I don't think eulogists usually quote scripture?
Hairraiser deep brunch
  05/13/12
Just as a rhetorical opening or closing.
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
the one that contains the "an eye for an eye" tale...
Copper swashbuckling generalized bond
  05/13/12
Ezekiel 25:17
crawly casino
  05/13/12
le sigh
metal talented center persian
  05/13/12
do the Samuel L. Jackson bit from Pulp Fiction
Vigorous awkward kitty cat circlehead
  05/13/12
Leviticus 11:10-12 - "But whatever is in the seas and i...
Bearded medicated turdskin national
  05/13/12
Greetings, I Corinthians 15:54 When the perishable puts on...
sinister hospital mood
  05/13/12
can you explain all the weird rapey shit the pumo posted abo...
hyperactive scarlet base karate
  05/13/12
i disagree with your interpretation. sounds to me like the p...
Copper swashbuckling generalized bond
  05/13/12
2nd kings 2:24
Sienna quadroon
  05/13/12
...
Sienna quadroon
  05/13/12
Just do book of whokebe bro
Disgusting Painfully Honest Dilemma Pisswyrm
  05/13/12
1 Corinthians 15:11-22
talking address idiot
  05/13/12
Make sure this is playing in the background during the eulog...
Ruddy thriller crackhouse
  05/13/12
if not flame, just speak from the heart bro
exciting cowardly mediation sandwich
  05/13/12


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Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:22 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

I'm not a Christian, but the service will be and I'm giving the eulogy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684453)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:23 PM
Author: Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum

pretty sure the eulogy is not a reading from scripture. unless this is like the funeral of an old testament prophet.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684458)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:25 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

I know that. I wanted a short passage to introduce (or maybe close) my speech. Deceased was pretty devout.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684469)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:25 PM
Author: Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum

if this is a religious funeral, there will be a pastor or some shit, and he will quote the bible a bunch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684474)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:26 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Yeah, I know that. I just wanted a short quotation to buttress my speech.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684480)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:26 PM
Author: Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum

and it would be kind of lame for a non-christian to quote scripture. maybe quote your own faith's scripture, or quote a novel you like.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684479)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:26 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

WTF? Non-Christians quote Scripture all the time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684482)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:30 PM
Author: Brilliant Unhinged Nowag Forum

Look, this is a stupid idea. You'll probably end up quoting something out of context and embarrassing yourself.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684517)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:32 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

That's why I'm taking recommendations from more knowledgeable posters instead of just flipping through the Bible.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684528)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:23 PM
Author: Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed

Something from Hosea?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684461)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:25 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Not familiar with that. Any particular passages?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684475)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:34 PM
Author: Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Hosea%201:2&version=KJV

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684542)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:35 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Fuck you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684554)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:38 PM
Author: Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis%2012:11-15&version=KJV

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684566)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:43 PM
Author: hyperactive scarlet base karate

so he gave his wife up to be raped to save himself?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684599)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:44 PM
Author: Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis%2020:1-2&version=KJV

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684610)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:46 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Knock it off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684618)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:51 PM
Author: Crimson House-broken Toaster Half-breed

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2%20Samuel%2016:20-22&version=KJV

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684664)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 7:03 PM
Author: hyperactive scarlet base karate

just do rape your father's slaves in public to humiliate him bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684779)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:49 PM
Author: hyperactive scarlet base karate

just do pimp your wife bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684641)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:38 PM
Author: hyperactive scarlet base karate

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684564)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:28 PM
Author: Ocher bawdyhouse

_____ was like a brother to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think.

If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684501)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:30 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Fuck the fuck off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684513)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:29 PM
Author: slippery location french chef

http://etext.virginia.edu/etcbin/toccer-new2?id=KjvPsal.sgm&images=images/modeng&data=/texts/english/modeng/parsed&tag=public&part=116&division=div1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684510)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:31 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

ty I think I'll use this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684522)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:32 PM
Author: slippery location french chef

make sure to find out which version of the bible the church/denomination uses, though. not all use the KJV. some even consider the KJV quasi-heretical.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684532)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:35 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Episcopalian?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684549)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:34 PM
Author: Vigorous awkward kitty cat circlehead

Ecclesiastes

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684540)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:35 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Any specific passages?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684552)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:40 PM
Author: sexy disrespectful cuck range

Dust in the wind, brother

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684582)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 9:23 PM
Author: Ruddy thriller crackhouse

Ecclesiastes is deep stuff.

American 20th-century novelist Thomas Wolfe wrote: "[O]f all I have ever seen or learned, that book seems to me the noblest, the wisest, and the most powerful expression of man’s life upon this earth — and also the highest flower of poetry, eloquence, and truth. I am not given to dogmatic judgments in the matter of literary creation, but if I had to make one I could say that Ecclesiastes is the greatest single piece of writing I have ever known, and the wisdom expressed in it the most lasting and profound."[1]

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685852)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:36 PM
Author: Hairraiser deep brunch

I don't think eulogists usually quote scripture?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684557)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:39 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

Just as a rhetorical opening or closing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684573)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:39 PM
Author: Copper swashbuckling generalized bond

the one that contains the "an eye for an eye" tale.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684574)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:40 PM
Author: crawly casino

Ezekiel 25:17

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684578)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:45 PM
Author: metal talented center persian

le sigh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684617)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:41 PM
Author: Vigorous awkward kitty cat circlehead

do the Samuel L. Jackson bit from Pulp Fiction

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684590)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:53 PM
Author: Bearded medicated turdskin national

Leviticus 11:10-12 - "But whatever is in the seas and in the rivers that does not have fins and scales among all the teeming life of the water, and among all the living creatures that are in the water, they are detestable things to you, and they shall be abhorrent to you; you may not eat of their flesh, and their carcasses you shall detest. Whatever in the water does not have fins and scales is abhorrent to you."

Then just calmly sit down as if nothing was out of order.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684678)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 6:56 PM
Author: sinister hospital mood

Greetings,

I Corinthians 15:54

When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: "Death is swallowed up in victory."

or juts "death is swallowed up in victory"

the gist is that even though we're dead, we get salvation through jesus, and this is a victory over death

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684719)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 7:05 PM
Author: hyperactive scarlet base karate

can you explain all the weird rapey shit the pumo posted above at all? what does that stuff mean to a devout christian?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684792)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 7:07 PM
Author: Copper swashbuckling generalized bond

i disagree with your interpretation. sounds to me like the passage is advocating killing gays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684818)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 7:18 PM
Author: Sienna quadroon

2nd kings 2:24

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20684866)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 7:50 PM
Author: Sienna quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685117)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 9:18 PM
Author: Disgusting Painfully Honest Dilemma Pisswyrm

Just do book of whokebe bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685805)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 9:22 PM
Author: talking address idiot

1 Corinthians 15:11-22

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685838)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 9:27 PM
Author: Ruddy thriller crackhouse

Make sure this is playing in the background during the eulogy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYVTr1u3EYc

Generations come and generations go,

but the earth remains forever.

5 The sun rises and the sun sets,

and hurries back to where it rises.

6 The wind blows to the south

and turns to the north;

round and round it goes,

ever returning on its course.

7 All streams flow into the sea,

yet the sea is never full.

To the place the streams come from,

there they return again.

8 All things are wearisome,

more than one can say.

The eye never has enough of seeing,

nor the ear its fill of hearing.

9 What has been will be again,

what has been done will be done again;

there is nothing new under the sun.

10 Is there anything of which one can say,

“Look! This is something new”?

It was here already, long ago;

it was here before our time.

11 No one remembers the former generations,

and even those yet to come

will not be remembered

by those who follow them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685886)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 13th, 2012 9:28 PM
Author: exciting cowardly mediation sandwich

if not flame, just speak from the heart bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1947843&forum_id=2#20685898)