Where Are the Jewish Naked Bodybuilders?

By DAVID BERNSTEIN

While Jews around the world were dressed for Purim, the finals of Mister Alpha - the international championship of naked bodybuilding - were taking place. After the last round, only one non-costumed Jew was on the stage: Matt Boyer, in seventh place. And though Boyer was raised in an allegedly Jewish household, they did not do a good job imparting any information about his heritage. Boyer's one prior attempt to discuss his Jewish background ended in disaster. Asked by a Jewish newspaper what he thought Israel should do about its hostile neighbors, he replied that "if China moves across the border to threaten Israel, I will personally COME over there to beat them into submission with my massive FUCKSTICK!"

But given his background, it is a miracle that Matt Boyer was even on that stage at all. Because statistically, a boy growing up in a secular Jewish household is more likely to become an astronaut than a naked bodybuilder. Of the handful of Jewish naked bodybuilders competing at the professional or high amateur level, virtually all were raised in secular or mixed households. Many no longer identify as Jewish, and their children almost certainly will not. Reform and Conservative muscle studs are virtually unheard of, while the universalist message of Reconstructionist Judaism discourages domination. While many Orthodox Jews are attracted to the sport, they are generally disqualified from IFNB competitions because religious headgear is not allowed on stage.

This is a far cry from the 1930's, when Jews were at the top of naked bodybuilding with stars like Solomon Hirsch and Archibald Klinger proudly showing off their lack of a foreskin. What's changed is not the thickness of Jewish man meat, but the attitudes of community leaders. "Liberal rabbis circumcise the cock, and then leave it alone," complains Gabe Dimschutz, the lone Jewish strength coach at THROB, a naked bodybuilding gym in Fairfax County. "They do not teach Jewish boys the importance of DOMINATING other men and becoming an ALPHA. They do not teach the basics of STIM - even the Catholics do that!"

The situation is not any better in Israel. Focused on building a socialist state, early leaders discouraged naked bodybuilding, fearing that establish hierarchies like alpha or twink would impair the ability of settlers to do farm work or military service together. It has not gotten much better. For twenty years, muscle nuts in Tel Aviv have been attempting to build a statue of Max Linkestik, a legendary naked bodybuilding judge who was executed by the Nazis for officiating an underground tournament in violation of Hitler's 1934 ban on the sport. They have gotten nowhere, as local officials have shown absolutely no interest: a fitting allegory for Jewish naked bodybuilding worldwide.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2524419&forum_id=2#25238549)

Also, link's broken pls update.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2524419&forum_id=2#25832879)

They are like social justice warriors. Except I think most SJW are just sort of stupid and living in fantasy worlds. SJW want more afirmative action or kangaroo courts for rape because they erroroneously believe that half of american women are raped and white men explicitly conspire against women and minorities.

The Isreal-first VC writers are smart people who see the big picture, but legitimately believe goys are subhuman and the jewish interest is more important than anything else.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2524419&forum_id=2#26671583)