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Hypo: Michigan names YOU next head football coach. How many wins in 2026?

Michigan names you its next head football coach, starting to...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
How does your coaching staff work? Can you hire anyone you w...
irradiated metal nowag headpube
  12/17/25
You can hire whoever you want, within the budget the athleti...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
Can I name one of the coordinators the acting head coach and...
irradiated metal nowag headpube
  12/17/25
No. You need to be head coach, do the normal head coach thin...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
brutal schedule
Black orchestra pit lettuce
  12/17/25
Looking at that schedule: Haha wow holy shit. Even for a rea...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
If Sherron Moore got another year they would have regressed ...
provocative ivory pistol house
  12/17/25
Yeah, aside from having to do it in the midst of a scandal, ...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
It definitely gets them back to winning sooner
provocative ivory pistol house
  12/17/25
We'll see if they can actually pull DeBoer from Alabama (whi...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
Fisch is out. Search firm reportedly found a major scandal i...
provocative ivory pistol house
  12/17/25
Interesting re Fisch. I wonder what it could be that is a &q...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
the same number as anyone else as long as i can hire good co...
slate hissy fit
  12/17/25
Had Moore not been fired, I think Michigan would limp to abo...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
moore was actually a good recruiter of players. his offensiv...
slate hissy fit
  12/17/25
tough schedule but lots of athletic and physical talent on t...
provocative ivory pistol house
  12/17/25
You need to do whatever you can as head coach. You can deleg...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
Probably go O-fer, but I'm definitely going to get fired for...
lemon roast beef
  12/17/25
* Unwillingly
irradiated metal nowag headpube
  12/17/25
This too
lemon roast beef
  12/17/25
I wouldn't even try to win games I'd just fuck as many colle...
white stage
  12/17/25
same but boys
glassy aromatic karate
  12/17/25
Can I bring in my own deal team?
Submissive point
  12/17/25
To play or to coach? Yes either way.
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
Amazing how this is the thing XO admits they can’t do,...
hot area associate
  12/17/25
Many of us played a little D1 ball in college. We've never c...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
...
irradiated metal nowag headpube
  12/17/25
exactly, if i had the time, it wouldn't be hard to turn my D...
Black orchestra pit lettuce
  12/17/25
cr. also, this hypo assumes you need to be an effective, wel...
peach set sneaky criminal
  12/17/25
Zero because I would fuck the first thicc white girl who bat...
Soggy iridescent foreskin masturbator
  12/17/25
Depends on whether I'm permitted to call all plays.
scarlet legal warrant roommate
  12/17/25
Of course you can. You're the head coach. Are you designing ...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
12-0 but I would cut Bryce Underwood and get a smart white g...
puce meetinghouse police squad
  12/17/25
coaches dont do shit, just recruit. let your o and d and spe...
glassy aromatic karate
  12/17/25
So how many wins do you get? And why don't all head coaches ...
Talking pocket flask
  12/17/25
like 2-3
glassy aromatic karate
  12/18/25
I hear they're close to announcing Ahmadinejad.
outnumbered national laser beams
  12/17/25
I was looking at 9 or 10 wins until you said I had to &ldquo...
big dark chapel reading party
  12/17/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:30 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Michigan names you its next head football coach, starting today. Assume the athletic department and boosters support you as much as they would any head coach.

How many games would you win in 2026? Their schedule is below.

Twist: How many games would you win if all of their 2026 HS recruits still come and no one flees to the portal--except a small handful of relatively unimportant players leaving for playing time or similar reasons.

[Edit: In the twist where players generally stay, 2025 assistant coaches also stay, to the extent you want them to stay. For other coaches and players not currently on the team/in the 2026 recruiting class, they'll join or transfer in if you can convince them to do so.]

Sept. 5, 2026 – Western Michigan (home)

Sept. 12, 2026 – Oklahoma (home)

Sept. 19, 2026 – UTEP (home)

Indiana (home)

Iowa (home)

Michigan State (home)

Penn State (home)

UCLA (home)

at Minnesota

at Ohio State

at Oregon

at Rutgers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:32 AM
Author: irradiated metal nowag headpube

How does your coaching staff work? Can you hire anyone you want to be OC and DC for any amount of money and let them run stuff?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516475)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:37 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

You can hire whoever you want, within the budget the athletic department gives you for assistant coaches and if those coaches accept your offers. That budget will be--at minimum--105% of what it was in 2025.

I'll edit the twist version to say that, along with current players staying, current assistant coaches and staff will stay too, if you want them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516491)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:44 AM
Author: irradiated metal nowag headpube

Can I name one of the coordinators the acting head coach and just do nothing?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516510)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:47 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

No. You need to be head coach, do the normal head coach things--overall practice design, in-game decisions (time outs, challenges, going for two).

You can have the OC and DC do the game plans and call the plays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516525)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:33 AM
Author: Black orchestra pit lettuce

brutal schedule

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516482)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:34 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Looking at that schedule: Haha wow holy shit. Even for a real coach that's a murderer's row of contenders.

4 legitimate top 10 teams and national title contenders: Indiana, OSU, Oklahoma, Oregon

2 other teams that will probably be good to very good: Penn State, Iowa

Even a legitimate coach would (and very likely will) struggle with that schedule.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516484)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:39 AM
Author: provocative ivory pistol house

If Sherron Moore got another year they would have regressed to 6 or 7 wins with that schedule. But if they hire the right head coach they could get 10 wins with the roster they have

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:41 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Yeah, aside from having to do it in the midst of a scandal, jettisoning Moore is a net positive for them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516499)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:44 AM
Author: provocative ivory pistol house

It definitely gets them back to winning sooner

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516512)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:51 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

We'll see if they can actually pull DeBoer from Alabama (which seems far fethced, but maybe they'll do it). That would be a great hire. I'm not convinced their other supposed candidates--Fisch and Dillingham--would be great hires, though either could be, and both are very likely significant upgrades from Moore who should have 8-9 wins a year as their floor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516537)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:13 PM
Author: provocative ivory pistol house

Fisch is out. Search firm reportedly found a major scandal in his background, which might be fine under normal circumstances but UMich can’t deal with something like that right now. Sounds like Dillingham at this point assuming he’s willing to leave

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516591)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:27 PM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Interesting re Fisch. I wonder what it could be that is a "major" scandal that this search firm uncovered but that is not publicly known and was apparently unknown during Washington's search that led to his hiring and from when Fisch was at Michigan himself. Any word on what it was?

I think Michigan is waiting on DeBoer, though he will likely either beat Oklahmoa (so the timing won't work) or he'll lose and still say he's staying at Alabama.

After that, they'll go to Dillingham. I'm very skeptical of him. He had a single good year.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516632)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:34 AM
Author: slate hissy fit

the same number as anyone else as long as i can hire good coordinators and get nil money. michigan has young talent.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516485)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:43 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Had Moore not been fired, I think Michigan would limp to about 6 or 7 wins with that schedule next year.

If they can bring in a very good head coach--e.g., poach DeBoer from Alabama if Oklahoma beats them this weekend--he can probably make his way to 10 wins there.

How would you do?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:10 PM
Author: slate hissy fit

moore was actually a good recruiter of players. his offensive coordinator is suspect at best and his d coordinator is ok i guess. it would totally depend on me getting a good o coordinator.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516585)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:36 AM
Author: provocative ivory pistol house

tough schedule but lots of athletic and physical talent on that roster, much of it young (youngest team in the B10 this year and still went 8-1 in conference)

If I have basically the same roster and I’m just doing play calling then I could coach them to 11 wins

But if I’m the one motivating them to practice hard and play hard and physical and through pain and to bleed for me as their head coach then 0-12

A head coach doesn’t need to be a schematic genius (you hire coordinators for that). They mainly need to be a leader of men and someone the team believes in enough to follow them into battle.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516487)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:46 AM
Author: Talking pocket flask

You need to do whatever you can as head coach. You can delegate as much as you reasonably can. So which is it? 0-12 or 11 wins?

Also, 0-12 seems harsh. Even if the head coach just meekly said "Go get 'em, I guess," the team still probably handles teams like Western Michigan and UTEP, if not also Rutgers, UCLA, and MSU, by virtue of being bigger, faster, and more talented.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516519)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:37 AM
Author: lemon roast beef

Probably go O-fer, but I'm definitely going to get fired for abusing my power as I'm banging every coed that willingly gives it up to me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516490)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:45 AM
Author: irradiated metal nowag headpube

* Unwillingly

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516514)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:46 AM
Author: lemon roast beef

This too

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 11:46 AM
Author: white stage

I wouldn't even try to win games I'd just fuck as many college girls as I could

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516521)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 4:57 PM
Author: glassy aromatic karate

same but boys

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517430)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:16 PM
Author: Submissive point

Can I bring in my own deal team?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516598)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:27 PM
Author: Talking pocket flask

To play or to coach? Yes either way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516633)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:31 PM
Author: hot area associate

Amazing how this is the thing XO admits they can’t do, meanwhile with two years of solid training they can hit 20 home runs in the major leagues.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:36 PM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Many of us played a little D1 ball in college. We've never coached football before.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516657)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:36 PM
Author: irradiated metal nowag headpube



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516660)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 12:44 PM
Author: Black orchestra pit lettuce

exactly, if i had the time, it wouldn't be hard to turn my D1 body and mind into a pro-level athlete

but i have decades of professional experience under my belt and leading and inspiring a team of 18-22 year old alphas is not my forte

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516686)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 1:28 PM
Author: peach set sneaky criminal

cr. also, this hypo assumes you need to be an effective, well-rounded coach. most athletic hypos would allow you to focus on one single aspect of a game (e.g., hitting home runs, scoring baskets, etc.).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516820)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 1:26 PM
Author: Soggy iridescent foreskin masturbator

Zero because I would fuck the first thicc white girl who batted her eyes at me and then autistically ignore her and get eXXXposed and fired within the first month

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516816)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 1:29 PM
Author: scarlet legal warrant roommate

Depends on whether I'm permitted to call all plays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516826)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 2:09 PM
Author: Talking pocket flask

Of course you can. You're the head coach. Are you designing and calling the offense and the defense?

Interesting question: How often do D1 coaches call the offense and the defense? It's gotta be very rare.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49516975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 4:56 PM
Author: puce meetinghouse police squad

12-0 but I would cut Bryce Underwood and get a smart white guy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517426)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 4:58 PM
Author: glassy aromatic karate

coaches dont do shit, just recruit. let your o and d and special teams coaches call plays. conditioning coach takes care of stuff. you go fluff players and parents and say inspirational things that chatgpt tells you to

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517432)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 8:20 PM
Author: Talking pocket flask

So how many wins do you get? And why don't all head coaches just do that?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517956)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 18th, 2025 12:05 AM
Author: glassy aromatic karate

like 2-3

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49518506)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 4:58 PM
Author: outnumbered national laser beams

I hear they're close to announcing Ahmadinejad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 17th, 2025 5:41 PM
Author: big dark chapel reading party

I was looking at 9 or 10 wins until you said I had to “design practice”.

I’m a game day coach, not a practice coach

I’d run the triple option

We’d score a lot on punt return and go for nearly every 4th and under 3, anywhere on the field

Use a lot of full back. Convert a TE if we don’t have a FB

I’d probably have a white squad and a black squad. Good for morale

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5811333&forum_id=2.#49517550)