Etiquette Q For Kidmos: Are Siblings Implicitly Invited To Kids B-Day Parties?
| ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | titus chicken | 02/11/26 | | gunneratttt gives free BJs to brocolli haired zoom | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | titus chicken | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | .,.,...,..,.,.,:,,:,.,.,:::,...,:,...:..:.,:.::,. | 02/12/26 | | Ass Sunstein | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | Pumonymous | 02/12/26 | | goy orbison | 02/11/26 | | Madison Avenue Lemming Enslaved to Conformity | 02/11/26 | | Derek Dicklicker | 02/12/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/12/26 | | Darnell | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | Barack Carcetti | 02/11/26 | | ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,., | 02/11/26 | | ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,., | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | Judas Jones | 02/11/26 | | titus chicken | 02/11/26 | | ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,., | 02/11/26 | | Darnell | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | Darnell | 02/11/26 | | ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,., | 02/11/26 | | Roblox | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ,..,,,,,,....,,,..., | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | ,..,,,,,,....,,,..., | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | (*)> | 02/11/26 | | Nazca Redlines | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | ,..,,,,,,....,,,..., | 02/11/26 | | Nazca Redlines | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/12/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/12/26 | | rubberneck | 02/12/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/12/26 | | some on social media | 02/12/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/12/26 | | Madison Avenue Lemming Enslaved to Conformity | 02/11/26 | | rubberneck | 02/12/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | jag | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/11/26 | | Shabbat | 02/11/26 | | @grok, is this true? | 02/11/26 | | Madison Avenue Lemming Enslaved to Conformity | 02/11/26 | | ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;.., | 02/12/26 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:15 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
does this depend on the location? what other variables?
another kid in son's prek class is having a bday party on a sunday afternoon. they presumably invited the whole class, which is required. party is at a kids' facility where presumably the parents have to either pay per kid, or pay a flat fee but have a limit on the number of the kids.
i dont expect them to pay for shit for everyone's other siblings, but i'm not sure what the protocol is. if we have to split up the family on a sunday, we probably just wouldnt go.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663312) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:17 PM Author: titus chicken
Ask if you can bring the sibling and offer to pay for the sibling. 80% of the time they say its ok and you don’t have to pay. Sometimes the number of kids is capped and you have to pay for that sibling.
You should ask though. This happens all the time.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663316) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:23 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
is asking this q rude in the first place bc theyre not gonna actually ask you to pay.
if i were on the other side, i wouldnt actually ask the parent to pay but i'd be annoyed at having to pay. hell, we probably just would have a bday party not at some goyishe place.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663339) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:56 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
def wouldnt show up without asking.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663456) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 9:50 AM
Author: .,.,...,..,.,.,:,,:,.,.,:::,...,:,...:..:.,:.::,.
/thread
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665352) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:22 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
because of shabbat, sunday is our only chance for a "family day out" -- it's nice to do things together as a family
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663334) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:45 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
hows it different than a goyishe family who spends their saturdays taking different kids to sportsdoing.
i cant imagine jews are the only ones who like to stick together as a family at least sometimes.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663416) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:57 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
low iq schtick? the lights can stay on. they just cant be turned off.
they spend shabbat going to shul and playing with their friends. they love it.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663457) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:20 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
actually, he does
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663537) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 9:09 AM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
Are you so poor that keeping a dining room light on for 24 hours is a big deal?l for you?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665287) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:58 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
what im saying is that the goyim are probably thingdoing on saturday and splitting up the family since youth sports are generally saturday not sunday, so sunday is the only family day even for goyim
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663459) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:54 PM Author: Barack Carcetti
one parent take the kid the party if the kid actually wants to go, other parent does something else with the other kid, switch parents who go to birthday parties.
Don't make the entire family show up to some kids birthday party.
That's not actually a 'nice thing' to do as a family.
Actually having one on one time with just one of the kids is nice, appreciate the chance to get to do that.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663451) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:12 PM
Author: ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,.,
lol going to a classmate's birthday party is not a "family activity." Showing up as an entire family is weird and yeah probably rude. Let your kid have time with his friends without siblings. It's good for him.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663512) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:22 PM
Author: ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,.,
Siblings are not invited unless explicitly listed. Inviting the whole class might be 20 kids (which at many venues is already expensive). Add in siblings and it's a fortune.
Commercial venue it's a hard no. Home party you could maybe ask, especially if your kid is too young to drop off and you don't have coverage at home. If it's a play place just pay for your kid to separately do their own thing while you keep an eye on them and you are nearby if your other kid needs anything at the party. Never presume and try not to put pressure on the host to accommodate you if you can avoid it.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663337) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:26 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
this is good scholarship
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663348) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:05 PM
Author: ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,.,
Right but you got permission ahead of time. I think you still have to be careful b/c they pay per person. If my venue includes 20 kids and only 15 can come, yeah I will be more welcoming of siblings. If it's 10 kids and every one after that costs $20, that makes it tougher.
I agree def not for drop-off parties and it shouldn't be necessary. It's only an issue when you HAVE to have the sibling with you. But you should do your best to not put the host in that position.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663483) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:35 PM Author: Darnell
for a home party, when kids are young enough that parents are staying, siblings are expected and normal.
if it's a drop off party (home or commercial setting), then no siblings.
if it's a commercial spot and parents are staying, i would expect younger siblings to stay and join. for example, if the party is for 5 year olds, i'd expect some parents to bring 3 year old siblings and would probably explicitly invite them.
edit: for younger kids, i look at birthday parties as an event where you invite a family rather than just the kid.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663370) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:44 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
>if it's a commercial spot and parents are staying, i would expect younger siblings to stay and join. for example, if the party is for 5 year olds, i'd expect some parents to bring 3 year old siblings and would probably explicitly invite them.
but there's no explicit invite to siblings.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663412) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:07 PM
Author: ,.,...,..,.,.,;:,.:,.,.,::,,,,..,:,.,.:.:.,:.::,.,
If it's a commercial place you are usually paying per kid. It's pretty rude to presume you can just bring yours. There's a lot of variables here. Some are places where they are open to the public and you can just pay for the sibling yourself and that's fine (though you should not eat food at the party b/c they budgeted for a specific amount of people). Some places are closed to the public and exclusively for parties. That forces the host to pay for your kid and is inconsiderate.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663494) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 1:59 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
i have manners. that's why i asked this Q.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663464)
|
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:45 PM Author: ,..,,,,,,....,,,...,
For ages where you invite whole class, a prestigious host will explicitly invite siblings so you don’t have to worry. To do otherwise implies that $20 is a lot of money to you, that you are trying to feed a bunch of kids on two pizzas and a single tray of cupcakes, and that you have failed to procure an entire suitable venue and are getting by on a limited capacity room in some prole shitvenue.
If you’ve been invited to that second type of party, just reply “unsubscribe” and teach your child the importance of affiliating with the right kind of people. Also consider moving or changing schools.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663598) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 2:50 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
the school requires the whole class be invited, or all of the class of the same gender, if inviting at least 1 kid from the class.
we're in are country
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663612) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 3:01 PM Author: ,..,,,,,,....,,,...,
Yeah that’s a good policy for young ages. But if you’re already inviting aspies and fat kids then you should also accommodate siblings within reason (obviously you can’t drop off a toddler at a middle-school party or vice versa). Once you get to the age with a curated guest list then you invite the family if you know everyone or the specific child if not and it’s clear.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663640) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 3:02 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
actually, the the school is thru 8th grade and the policy applies to all grades afaik.
i still think it's a good policy even for older kids and it's nice.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663645) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:44 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
it's a small school and classes are 10-15 kids per grade. divide by half, and you've got 5-8 kids of each gender in each class. why not force them to invite everyone and create a nice atmosphere?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664065) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 3:03 PM Author: (*)> (i'm in your city)
home / public space party: yes
Playspace party: feel free to bring them but be prepared to pay out of pocket
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663651) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:08 PM Author: Nazca Redlines
This thread is violence. In communities of color, the party lasts for hours with a vague start and end time, and the whole family is implicitly invited.
In the culutre of the oppressor, only the specifically invited guests can come (i.e., the classmates, and maybe a couple friends of the birthday boy/girl's siblings, if he/she has siblings). It's rude to even ask about bringing one of your other kids, unless (a) it's an infant, who won't even really do the gymnastics or arcade games or whatever or (b) the party is at a public park and it's nbd if some siblings come and also play on the playground or whatever.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663981) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:14 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
rofl. so true.
even in your (b), it still might NOT be nbd some siblings will have a slice of your precious pizza.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663991) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:20 PM Author: ,..,,,,,,....,,,...,
I mean we had extra pizza because the parents are all on Ozempic and the kids all wanted cake more, but WHAT IF WE RAN OUT!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664005) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:46 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
facilities charging $$ for kids to play are white spaces. das racis to even have a party at these places and expect minorities to feel comfortable.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664070) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:59 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
dat too much gas money
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664098) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 9:00 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
tbf, there's something deeply wrong with the white american way of life where your school class is just some randoms.
in the ortho jew world, ur kid's classmates are likely kids who live in the same neighborhood and go to your same shul and you play with after schools and on shabbat.
the soullessness of white american k-12 is why whites have so many social problems
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664449) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 8:40 AM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
ROFL, Jews don’t play lacrosse, my man
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665259) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 9:19 AM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665301) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 11:33 AM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665669) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:16 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
this is a surprisingly SOLID thread. real advice containing a range of reasonable opinions written in an intelligent manner. this feels like xo of yore.
perhaps bc we've never done this thread, it's interesting to people.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49663995) |
 |
Date: February 11th, 2026 6:00 PM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
i'd rather not go. kids wont be able to eat the food anyway
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664100) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 5:56 PM Author: @grok, is this true?
If it’s in a facility, no siblings
If it’s a park, nbd but you have to only take a leftover goodie bag if any
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664091) |
Date: February 11th, 2026 11:13 PM Author: Madison Avenue Lemming Enslaved to Conformity
Seems to have gotten to the right place here.
Based on NYC where parties at kid gyms are $50 per kid or so:
1. Kid gym/paid facility - drop off - siblings definitely not invited and don’t ask.
2. Same as 1 but parents stay - siblings are welcome if they’re young enough that they can’t participate in the activity and won’t throw a fit that they’re not “part of the party.”
3. Home party follows the same rules as 1-2, but if parents are staying you can say “we’d love to make it but I can’t because of childcare for little sibling.” The host should then offer to let you bring the little sibling. If it’s at a public place like a park, you are OK just straight up asking if siblings are invited. If they’re not the people are sociopaths and you shouldn’t go.
4. If you bring a second kid, bring a small second gift. Like a coloring book or something
5. Don’t waste your time having both parents at a birthday party. You and wife should split up for this and alternate. It’s a rare opportunity to have solo time for one parent and it’s not that hard to watch a little one when there are tons of other kids and parents around.
6. Once you get to 1st grade or so and everyone has been through this, parents will stop being retarded and tell you if it’s drop off etc. in the invite.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49664849) |
 |
Date: February 12th, 2026 9:10 AM
Author: ...,,..;...,,..,..,...,,,;..,
This is some scholarship.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5833643&forum_id=2Elisa#49665288) |
|
|