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What's the dumbest thing you've done while drunk?
| Bearded comical half-breed | 07/11/25 |
| submissive volcanic crater | 07/11/25 |
| Bearded comical half-breed | 07/11/25 |
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| poerkan | 07/28/25 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: July 11th, 2025 9:52 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed I think i get a 180 for this, or wasnt driving or texting an ex or whatever. I went to the optometrist (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092663) |
Date: July 11th, 2025 9:53 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater trying to navigate the real world while drunk can actually be really fun. lol @ going to the optometrist though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092664) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:01 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed It was really funny because he was getting really pissed off. I remember him snapping at me "Hey hey HEY both eyes" while I was desperately squinting through my dominant eye (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092678) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:32 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater 180 ^ 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092755) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:32 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092880) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:29 PM Author: chestnut center azn The first and only time I drove drunk I was 19 and at a house party and got blitzed and just felt like going home to lay down. I know I shouldn’t have drove but I did I was like “wow, I can’t believe how easy this is.” (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093122) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:46 PM Author: Titillating School Cafeteria I was also 19 but I got home and fell asleep in the back yard (parents' house). I think they came out and made fun of me
the only reason I didn't die is because no one else was on the road. it legitimately "scared me straight" from drunk driving which you would think is flame, but I still think on it and shudder. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:05 AM Author: Red hot associate Got in a fight with my wife and drove to my office intending on spending the night there and then came back. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092688) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:21 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Lol this is cr. When you're about to move out and by the time you find your keys you can't remember why (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092725) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:29 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092745) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 12:58 PM Author: Vivacious infuriating institution I once went for drinks after work in the office and came back and fell asleep on some "partner's" couch. Luckily I woke up and went home around 1 AM or so (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103197) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:14 AM Author: Purple Outnumbered Ticket Booth Hit on various women who rejected me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092707) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 9:00 PM Author: onyx rigor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096703) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 9:00 PM Author: onyx rigor My worst was a hotel front desk clerk. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096705) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 5:47 PM Author: dark at-the-ready dilemma gunner did you drunkenly assume he likes fat guys? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49098413) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:46 AM Author: Purple Outnumbered Ticket Booth I have done this so many times it's hard to find a worst, but I haven't drunk enough to be drunk in >50 years. When I was a young lawlyer I threw up on the managing partner's wife's shoes at a firm picnic. They thought I was drunk, but it was in fact food poisoning. Had to go to the ER. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100131) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:30 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater Ive done a lot of fairly stupid shit while drunk, but one that stands out in my mind is the night i jumped over the deck fence of the bar i was at because i couldn't find the exit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092749) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:35 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater I also once climbed out my bedroom window to avoid inviting an annoying friend out with me (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092763) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:37 AM Author: Flesh site fortuitous meteor let a random guy on the street make a phone call with my cell phone. fell asleep with a pot of water boiling on the stove (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092769) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:39 AM Author: mint underhanded field milk lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092772) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:43 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed how did the random guy turn the stove on (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092906) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:53 AM Author: Flesh site fortuitous meteor lol separate events! but i do appreciate the innuendo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092941) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:38 AM Author: buck-toothed odious stead go to law school. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092770) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:38 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092771) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093440) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:42 AM Author: impressive water buffalo trailer park blacked out while driving, twice. made it home fine but holy shit that was dumb. both times involved a major interstate highway. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092777) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:46 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater Incredible poast/moniker synergy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092784) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:20 PM Author: Racy scarlet hell deer antler (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093059) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093441) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:42 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater Hooked up with guy, puked in his bathroom, used towel to clean it up and turned out it was his roommates towel. Whoops! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092780) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 4:26 PM Author: naked clown I love how the focal point of this short vignette is that it was *somebody else's* towel as if everything else is just noise. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103799) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:44 AM Author: Pearly high-end circlehead spot A law professor waved at me while passing me in the hallway and for some reason I thought he was going in for a high five so I swung at him wildly with my open hand trying to make contact and he ducked out of the way like I was trying to hit him. I was so bewildered by the whole interaction that I didn’t even say anything and just scurried off (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092781) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:44 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092782) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:50 AM Author: Slimy messiness parlor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092791) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:53 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Soo cr (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092796) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:18 AM Author: provocative bistre therapy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092849) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:22 AM Author: Red hot associate Pumpkin beers. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092862) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:34 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092883) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:23 PM Author: Racy scarlet hell deer antler (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093077) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:47 PM Author: Titillating School Cafeteria (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093435) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093442) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 12:35 AM Author: Frozen whorehouse lmfao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097029) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:49 AM Author: glassy abnormal lay why were you drunk at school? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097258) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 2:28 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed ?? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103497) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:27 AM Author: onyx rigor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100063) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:43 AM Author: chestnut center azn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100109) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 1:17 PM Author: beady-eyed puce dog poop cuck (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100361) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 4:00 PM Author: sickened dull mad cow disease (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100837) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:47 AM Author: Crystalline razzle-dazzle casino mad-dog skullcap Snuck out of my parents' house and walked with some friends to a girl's house in a nearby neighborhood all while leaving a trail of empty beer cans for the police to follow and then arrest us. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092789) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:48 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater Given that you now white knight for angel reese, id say your decision making skills havent improved (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092790) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:55 AM Author: Crystalline razzle-dazzle casino mad-dog skullcap i can't imagine hating on angel reese. if you watched her at all in college you know she is a great team player and has the ability to impact every play in various ways. in her second year she's leading the league in rebounds by a massive margin and has improved her offensive game and efficiency immensely.
I genuinely don't understand the hate she receives. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:22 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed She's so cool and I love her eyelashes so you know she's a female (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092859) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 3:23 PM Author: Crystalline razzle-dazzle casino mad-dog skullcap you're a cool female! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093742) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:53 AM Author: Irate personal credit line i moved to MFH and had absolutely no friends. Not even acquaintances. I used to get very drunk in those days. Sometimes a week would pass without someone talking to me, apart from a cashier.
I took to walking around with an open bottle and listening for parties, in the walk-up buildings around the EV and LES.
Id often go up and play the "Jessica invited me" (or Yessica if it was more puerto rican looking).
Sometimes this lead to me having to say "What? There's no Jessica?? I must have the wrong address, Im so sorry!"
There was an ocassional them saying, "Hey Jessica, you know this guy?"
More often, it was "hahah hey whatever dude, make yourself at home".
Only a few "Mike, I think this guy is fucking lying, he's probably came in to steal shit, hey guys c'mere, we have a fucking thief here"
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:01 AM Author: Learning disabled forum mediation 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092820) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:44 PM Author: medicated mind-boggling immigrant 180 need more stories from this period of life brother (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096986) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:48 AM Author: glassy abnormal lay (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097257) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:14 AM Author: Cream Space Striped Hyena (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097221) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:56 AM Author: rusted splenetic property persian Registered for xo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092803) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:16 AM Author: Territorial slate heaven falling off a balcony while hanging with gunner (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092838) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:16 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater Wasnt it a roof? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092840) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:18 AM Author: Territorial slate heaven to be pedantic, it was a balcony hanging over another roof (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092846) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:19 AM Author: submissive volcanic crater It is important to be as accurate as possible when regaling friends with tales of drunkenness (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092852) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:21 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Draw this (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092857) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:10 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native https://i.imgur.com/ncKHJBP.png
i was waiting outside of lex's apartment in my car to pick him up, which was on the second story over a store. behind the apartment was a parking lot. for reasons that remain unclear to me lex liked to leave through the balcony and climb down the fire escape. while waiting in the car way too long he eventually scuffled up to the passenger door, disheveled, with a few cuts. the conversation went something like this:
lex: sorry, i just fell off my balcony.
gunner: what lol are you ok?
lex: yeah i'm fine.
gunner: lol ok let's go get a drink. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:15 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed this image is of a man falling backwards into a chickenwire covered alien driven skateboard with ketchup rims (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093029) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:01 PM Author: Territorial slate heaven https://ibb.co/607Mnjzv (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093269) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:03 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native hfs 180^180^1800000!!!!!! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093277) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:05 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed 180. Gunner is pretty handsome for an Indian |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:26 PM Author: Territorial slate heaven i'm a lucky man, no homo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093350) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:29 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Rank the top 5 stories itt (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093354) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 9:40 PM Author: Slimy messiness parlor scholarship's story is #1 by far, who cares about the rest (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094816) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 8:58 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed muscadine wine slicing his arms open like a tin can to demonstrate knife quality was an exception addition (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49095392) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 8:58 PM Author: Territorial slate heaven (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096698) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:15 AM Author: Cream Space Striped Hyena (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097222) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:35 AM Author: bright passionate nursing home shitlib Do t you already have concussion/Brain issues (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097246) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 3:58 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native caused/exacerbated by shit like this, which was years ago and before lex got sober (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103713) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 2:11 PM Author: massive double fault I really like it here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097953) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:37 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native because of my Scumbag upbringing this didn't register to me as a concerning incident (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092892) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:46 AM Author: Territorial slate heaven (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092913) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:40 PM Author: submissive volcanic crater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093193) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 8:07 AM Author: glassy abnormal lay (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097277) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:06 AM Author: indigo church building (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49099906) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:43 AM Author: exhilarant base Is that what put you in the hospital/off xo for a long time?
This happened to a friend of mine but he didn’t maek it :( |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:47 AM Author: Territorial slate heaven ah, sorry to hear that, man. i was already having seizures and had heavy brain bleeding, but this couldn't have helped |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:17 AM Author: provocative bistre therapy DV and i got locked up for 3 days (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092843) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:29 AM Author: Razzle translucent gay wizard Reconciled and hooked up with an ex who later tried to kill me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092875) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:33 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native went to couples therapy. we, uh, had to end the session early. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092882) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:41 AM Author: Bearded comical half-breed much many more details to do the needful (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092901) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:52 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native we were having a fight before we were heading off to therapy. before i get in the car i drank a bunch of whiskey at once. maybe half a bottle or more. so, i didn't really start getting drunk until the session started. everyone was confused because i was fine a minute ago and i made some excuses like "idk what's wrong i'm just not feeling well." therapist decided to end the session because i was "groggy", and i drove home with my ex. at the next session the therapist was pissed and scolded me for driving. i continued to say that i was fine and just got woozy or something randomly. she give me this scowl and after that she seemed really against me in sessions. before that it felt like she was on my side more often than not. i think she dealt with a lot of drunks and could recognize i was trashed more than most people could, because i can usually keep it together really well.
i think the marriage lasted another couple months after that! |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:23 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Mmhm Probably hard to pull off the cool fratty drunk guy at couples therapy.
I rate this as number 2 stupid after me getting prescription lenses while being drunk |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:29 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native i'm very gregarious and convincing. doesn't really work with someone trained on drunks i guess. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093123) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:34 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed Yes it's literally why your wife brought you there (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093158) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:06 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native you fags are oracles when it comes to male/female dynamics and i think you're probably right that she needed someone i couldn't just charm into being on my side. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093292) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:42 AM Author: exhilarant base Doing couples therapy with someone you aren’t at least engaged to is… idk what but it’s bad (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092903) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:44 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native this was with my exwife! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092910) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:47 AM Author: exhilarant base I didnt know you were a divorcee (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092917) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:12 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native still am too (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093015) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:16 PM Author: Arrogant Hominid Many layers to this fag’s loserdom (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093038) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:19 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native here's another crazy story about my ex-wife: she never cucked me with other men, emasculated me by sharing embarrassing details about me publicly, or tried to damage my life in any way. we also remained friends for many years after and i never once desperately ran back to her because i couldn't get laid any other way.
haha crazy right? |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:26 PM Author: Arrogant Hominid “I’m a huge simp”
great poast, champ |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:28 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native how are you even real? can't wait to see how this crash out ends. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093116) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM Author: Arrogant Hominid You’re too in your 40s to talk like that (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093135) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:35 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native and you're a bit too old for "mom please dont take my computer, i promise ill look for a job after i pwn these kikes on autoadmit!" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093166) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:52 AM Author: provocative bistre therapy other things:
1. threw a full can of beer into a crowd of people at a club called Sonar in baltimore. got jumped and absolutely fucked up, face was all bruised, like my entire face was a black eye. a friend of mine hit one of the guys who did it in the face with a cinderblock outside the club. had to go to classes as a 3L and to my job at the national archives' gc office with a fucked up face for 2 weeks. i said it was a basketball injury lol.
2. blacked out and got thrown out of an uber in chicago at like 2 am. woke up in an elevator in a parking garage at 5. found my way back to my hotel, had to be at a biz dev presentation at 9 am. someone had to cover for me.
3. got in multiple fights with that stripper i was fooling around with as we spent a week traveling from hotel to hotel in LA/SD. was blackout drunk almost the whole time.
there are others, but these are top of mind. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:55 AM Author: Flesh site fortuitous meteor i feel like you would win this thread, not that it's a competition. you didn't even hit on anything that involves waking up next to a transsexual prostitute (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49092950) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:15 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy i am sure i have other wild shit. for overall zany things you've done on booze and drugs, i bet i would win. i was an absolute mess for a few years.
showed up to labor negotiations still high on coke once. another time i was bargaining with a unit of nurses and the union rep asked me if i needed medical attention. i was on a 2 day bender, coming down off coke and was basically green. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM Author: Flesh site fortuitous meteor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093136) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:59 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native one time i blacked out on a date. it was really going well i thought. i had a few too many and suddenly she excused herself but not before making sure i called an uber. i don't remember anything after that except coming to outside in the city in the middle of winter. i've never been so cold in my life. i went to an emergency room to warm up. i called another uber and got in, then blacked out again. woke up in bed with no phone or car, not remembering anything that happened after the date except for being freezing in the city for a moment.
had to call my mom to go get my car. then i had to use my cell phone tracking app to find my phone, which was in the second uber in the driver's apartment complex. i found the car and could see my phone in the back seat. i sent a message to uber about it but i guess the driver wasn't available. i went around the apartment complex asking whose car it was. after trying every door i gave up and left a note on the windshield.
the driver called me that night and she gave me my phone. i remember it was on valentine's day and she met me in a red lobster parking lot where she was getting dinner with her husband. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 9:39 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy 180. Louis cannon type story (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094815) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 3:33 PM Author: glassy abnormal lay Lmao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49098106) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:16 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed your stories are 180 when you consider that you have been outed and you must be the biggest pencil neck dweeb on earth. its nearly impossible to imagine that guy getting into any of these antics (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093039) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:19 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy wild stuff, man. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093056) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:25 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy another one was i blacked out at my friend's house back in 05 and tried to drive home. for some reason i drove to my childhood home's neighborhood. woke up at 7 am with the car running in front of a cop's house, but luckily the cop had recently been killed in the line of duty.
oh, this is a good one. in 2012 i ate a bunch of ambien and drank a 6 pack. then drove to the liquor store to get more beer and was changing out CDs in my car and crashed into a truck. i fled and went home and texted my wife (she was out) "woah someone just hit my car and took off lol" but about 10 mins later the cops came to my house. i remember them being in my condo and one of them laughing at me that i'd have to report this to the bar, etc. another cop was like "hey genius, you know your VIN was on the panel of your car that you left at the scene, don't you?"
i was 100% out of it and hallucinating. they didn't charge me with DUI bc i was no longer at the scene, but they told me they knew i was drunk.
i wound up making up a story about taking the med as prescribed and sleep driving. i got off. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy oh shit, i forgot this one. in december 2017, i was about to be promoted to partner at baker hostetler. the guy who put me up had a end of year get together at the Palm in DC (he is one of the caricatures on the wall). there were like 15 people there. i got absolutely wrecked on martinis. i was obviously drunk in front of him but thankfully he left. the restaurant ultimately asked me to leave and i lost my phone and a coworker had to order me an uber.
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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:27 PM Author: onyx rigor we should party sometime (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096948) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 3:03 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy i'm sober now but i'll RAGE with you anyway.
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:21 PM Author: Fighting lodge accidentally used the diesel can instead of the kerosene can (for a kerosene heater), woke up in blackface, entire cabin coated with soot
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:30 PM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman Came back home after drinking at the bar and fell asleep spooning by black lab who was 15 years old and I knew she was going to die soon. My lab didn’t like to be cuddled so she probably got up and hobbled away as soon as I passed out.
The dog bed was right in front of my security door. I kept the front door open because it was summer and no A/C.
I awoke to my next door neighbor, a black nurse, coming home from her night shift. I hear, “Oh, chimata! What are you doing?”
It was pretty embarrassing. |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:32 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy wait, you're telling me you have a black wife AND you had a black lab? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093139) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:40 PM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman Yeah but now I have a yellow lab to even things out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093191) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:41 PM Author: submissive volcanic crater You have a black wife and yellow lab? You got those two mixed up, friend (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093202) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:36 PM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman OFS (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093383) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:56 PM Author: wonderful temple degenerate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093641) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:02 PM Author: impressive water buffalo trailer park now you need a yellow mistress (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093273) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:04 PM Author: Magenta Elastic Band Idea He Suggested I was a knife salesman for Cutco knives and showed up to a sales appointment drunk and proceeded to cut myself in multiple spots during the demonstration, and got the blood all over my white shirt. The people were terrified and bought a bunch of knives just to get rid of me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093283) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:06 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed 180000000000 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093288) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:32 PM Author: submissive volcanic crater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093367) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:35 PM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093382) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:43 PM Author: Pearly high-end circlehead spot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093417) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:44 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093421) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:50 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew lmao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093446) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:50 PM Author: Deep chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093447) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:51 PM Author: motley tank "Go and do likewise, gents." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093450) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:00 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093486) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:34 PM Author: Titillating School Cafeteria (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093577) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:40 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093586) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 9:42 PM Author: Bateful chartreuse rehab (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094818) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 8:08 AM Author: glassy abnormal lay (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097278) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:40 AM Author: Ungodly Meetinghouse Filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100090) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:51 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093452) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:02 PM Author: Titillating School Cafeteria (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093497) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 12:03 AM Author: Bespoke hissy fit death wish this would make a great scene in a movie (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097013) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 12:45 AM Author: Frozen whorehouse (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097041) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:18 AM Author: Cream Space Striped Hyena (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097226) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:10 AM Author: indigo church building (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49099912) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:27 AM Author: onyx rigor 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100060) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 5:37 PM Author: bull headed pea-brained hall (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49101150) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:53 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew This thread delivered. My story involves getting extremely drunk at a summer associate event. Being extremely drunk I figured I shouldn't get a cab but should "walk it off" on my way home. For some reason I either drunk dialed my parents or they called me and I stupidly picked up and vaguely got in some huge fight with them, the details or even high level of which I had no clue about the next day. I finally staggered home and my dog and wife were both disgusted. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093458) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:59 PM Author: Red hot associate One time I passed out in a Subway parking lot. The cops found me and went through my phone to find someone to take me. They called my grandma, luckily she was asleep since it was late. They went down the list and found a friend to come get me. Glad I didn't get run over. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49095073) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:59 PM Author: Vengeful Soul-stirring Dingle Berry fucked up my favorite jeans and a pair of shoes i really liked because I fell into a retention pond in Orlando while taking a shortcut to a gas station to buy more beer after I went out for the night on a work trip and wanted to keep drinking. by some miracle I actually brought a second pair of shoes because the next day I flew directly to Washington DC to attend the 2016 inauguration of Donald Trump. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093482) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 4:44 AM Author: Charismatic hideous mexican travel guidebook I severely fucked up my Speedmaster drunkenly falling up concrete stairs leading to a Jimmy John’s. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097176) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:00 PM Author: electric cocky corner sex with men for money (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093487) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:07 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed How much did you pay (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093508) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:59 PM Author: electric cocky corner cant remember, was drunk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093648) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 5:49 PM Author: twinkling appetizing pit indirect expression (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094209) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:16 PM Author: Deep chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093538) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 3:24 PM Author: costumed gold locale Hit on my SIL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093746) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 3:53 PM Author: Fighting lodge can you provide details (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49093813) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 9:42 PM Author: house-broken menage I outran the cops going about 115 mph one night, although I was drunk and high so you can't just blame the booze, but it saved me in its own way (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094819) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:00 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy 180, did that scare you sober for a while? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094957) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:01 PM Author: house-broken menage not that I recall (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49094959) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 9:29 PM Author: provocative bistre therapy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096758) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 3:00 PM Author: mint underhanded field milk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100657) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 12:52 AM Author: tripping hairraiser gaming laptop I got into a fight with a Canadian goose. I lost; badly. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49095144) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 8:59 PM Author: Flesh site fortuitous meteor vicious animals (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096701) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:35 PM Author: tripping hairraiser gaming laptop I lost part of my scalp. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096970) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:29 AM Author: onyx rigor nasty motherfuckers (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100066) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 1:14 AM Author: Nubile olive stock car Apply and then get accepted to law school (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49095157) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:36 PM Author: tripping hairraiser gaming laptop Lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096971) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:36 PM Author: tantric kitchen ceo Major crimes unit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49096973) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:27 PM Author: Obsidian National Potus (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49101872) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 1:20 AM Author: razzmatazz public bath I was at a sushi bar alone and started doing sake shots with the wait staff after they closed. For some reason we started drinking tequila and I blacked out. They somehow found my home and dropped me off at like 4am. No idea what happened in between (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097065) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 2:27 AM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman In my early 20s, I was working in a chain pharmacy and a co-worker asked me to DJ her wedding. I had never DJ’d anything before. I had a CD player and two huge bass amps. I got drunk as shit during the wedding, slurring, trying to be funny on the microphone, getting blank stares. I didn’t play any typical wedding songs. Didn’t have any in my collection. I had classic rock. Basically played my favorite songs all night to a bunch of people I didn’t know, getting drunk for free.
There was this cringey moment where I thought I was being smooth by introducing a song with some commentary about the band. You don’t know what band it is I’m talking about because that is supposed to be suspenseful and the big reveal came as I hit play: “We Can Work It Out” by the Beatles.
I was so drunk the new husband drove my truck to his house and let me sleep in my truck on the street. It was a Chevy S-10 and he thought he was pressing the emergency brake with his foot but he stepped on the vent lever, crushing it.
I think she paid me $100 and don’t think we ever talked about it afterwards. |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 8:21 AM Author: Arousing Sable Preventive Strike Quadroon (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097298) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:44 AM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100119) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:49 AM Author: Deep chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100149) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 4:21 AM Author: Obsidian National Potus felt something (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097173) |
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Date: July 28th, 2025 8:00 PM Author: Afghan HDI charts (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49138695) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:09 AM Author: chrome dragon garrison OP is a broke ass gay faggot with literal AIDSs in his 60s. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097217) |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 8:11 AM Author: glassy abnormal lay drive drunk hundreds of times, sometimes having to cover one eye
was groping with the boss’ daughter in the corner of the bar (there were pics)
numerous fights that could have ended badly |
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Date: July 13th, 2025 1:38 PM Author: chestnut center azn Fell for Mossad honeypot operation and fucked a teen on hidden camera (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49097879) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:22 AM Author: Arrogant Hominid (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49099929) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 1:29 PM Author: Pungent deranged brunch jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103335) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:03 AM Author: provocative bistre therapy went to see hotel for dogs in the movie theater (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49099900) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:04 AM Author: ebony stirring den giraffe Legal work (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49099901) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:39 AM Author: Arrogant Hominid Have never done anything dumb (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100088) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 1:11 PM Author: indigo church building Was bowling and my friend was poking me so I “accidentally” threw my bowling ball at her backwards. It bounced and shattered the beer mug her boyfriend was holding severing an artery and sending him to the ER. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100350) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 3:02 PM Author: mint underhanded field milk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100660) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 3:57 PM Author: Nofapping theatre skinny woman Hilarious for everyone involved! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49100823) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:27 PM Author: bonkers crotch market Not committed suicide (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49101873) |
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Date: July 14th, 2025 10:32 PM Author: Histrionic Digit Ratio Haha ohhhhhh kayyyyy
Pushed over a motorcycle
Egged a dudes car
Hit on a friends GF
Fucked a few chonkers
Bough box set of Tales from the crypt (turned out kind of 180)
Drove a LOT including in my ‘94 junker with a busted headlight
Top of mind
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Date: July 15th, 2025 11:59 AM Author: beady-eyed puce dog poop cuck when I went out and had an incredible date with the most perfect and cool girl that I've ever gone out with (we were literally talking about our future together, how similar we were etc), went home drunk, saw some dude beating off from my condo patio looking into another unit, started laughing uncontrollably and tried to call her to tell her about it. She didn't answer so I sent some drunken text with no context that I just saw some guy beating off.
She took days to respond to my text and I completely ruined it.
I then went on a spree of hundreds of failed first dates and constant rejection and disappointment |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 12:05 PM Author: Slimy messiness parlor (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103014) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 2:30 PM Author: Bearded comical half-breed literally talking about our future together, how similar we were tp (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103504) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 3:55 PM Author: blue glittery codepig native (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103708) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 12:56 PM Author: Vivacious infuriating institution Went to a gun range. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2Elisa#49103190) |
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