The most prestigious law school admissions discussion board in the world.
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Johnsmeyer calling Suze Orman w/ "Scream" voice distorter
| abusive boltzmann business firm | 06/11/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/11/14 |
| Obsidian foreskin | 06/11/14 |
| topaz contagious associate | 06/11/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/11/14 |
| topaz contagious associate | 06/11/14 |
| abusive boltzmann business firm | 06/11/14 |
| infuriating razzle cruise ship | 04/04/15 |
| Geriatric Home Preventive Strike | 06/11/14 |
| Dashing Resort Rigpig | 06/12/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/12/14 |
| glittery sickened gaming laptop | 06/12/14 |
| talented mint turdskin striped hyena | 06/12/14 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 06/12/14 |
| Fear-inspiring step-uncle's house | 06/12/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/12/14 |
| Geriatric Home Preventive Strike | 06/13/14 |
| topaz contagious associate | 06/13/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/13/14 |
| Vigorous library | 06/13/14 |
| Dashing Resort Rigpig | 06/13/14 |
| opaque hideous people who are hurt crackhouse | 06/13/14 |
| Geriatric Home Preventive Strike | 06/13/14 |
| big-titted bateful hissy fit | 06/13/14 |
| white pocket flask | 06/13/14 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 06/13/14 |
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| disrespectful bearded brunch macaca | 02/14/15 |
| Ocher fragrant field | 04/04/15 |
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| pearly mother | 08/05/15 |
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| shimmering supple useless brakes trust fund | 08/06/15 |
| Grizzly Orchestra Pit Place Of Business | 08/06/15 |
| Copper Goal In Life | 08/06/15 |
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| Arousing Adulterous Old Irish Cottage Black Woman | 08/06/15 |
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| spruce heaven pervert | 10/08/15 |
| Odious sable quadroon principal's office | 10/08/15 |
| khaki corner fat ankles | 11/18/15 |
| Appetizing Irate School Stock Car | 11/18/15 |
| Deep ticket booth incel | 12/17/15 |
| pearly mother | 12/17/15 |
| Nofapping shitlib death wish | 03/14/16 |
| Talking domesticated main people trailer park | 05/31/16 |
| Pea-brained space international law enforcement agency | 05/31/16 |
| Dashing Resort Rigpig | 07/24/16 |
| Honey-headed jap hominid | 11/29/16 |
| unhinged theater stage | 06/02/17 |
| Indigo Base Tank | 06/03/17 |
| Peach deranged shrine | 12/10/18 |
| Translucent Low-t Boistinker Coffee Pot | 01/29/18 |
| Aphrodisiac ruby athletic conference multi-billionaire | 05/13/18 |
| Peach deranged shrine | 12/10/18 |
| Flesh affirmative action | 06/25/19 |
| topaz contagious associate | 12/25/19 |
| disrespectful bearded brunch macaca | 12/30/19 |
| Glassy Abode Boiling Water | 02/02/20 |
| citrine office | 06/26/20 |
| charismatic senate twinkling uncleanness | 03/27/21 |
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| infuriating razzle cruise ship | 04/04/15 |
| Deep ticket booth incel | 08/05/15 |
| disrespectful bearded brunch macaca | 06/13/14 |
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| Comical crawly hall corn cake | 02/14/15 |
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| poppy histrionic therapy locus | 04/04/15 |
| Ocher fragrant field | 04/04/15 |
| passionate sapphire state | 08/05/15 |
| mustard set | 08/06/15 |
| Green provocative whorehouse telephone | 10/08/15 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 10/08/15 |
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| Honey-headed jap hominid | 10/08/15 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 10/08/15 |
| Geriatric Home Preventive Strike | 10/08/15 |
| Deep ticket booth incel | 12/17/15 |
| Bright french chef | 10/18/15 |
| curious faggotry | 10/31/15 |
| Deep ticket booth incel | 12/17/15 |
| Nofapping shitlib death wish | 03/14/16 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 08/12/16 |
| Wild Heady Pistol Rehab | 02/16/17 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 02/18/17 |
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| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 10/31/23 |
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| Vigorous library | 06/12/14 |
| ebony violent parlor | 06/13/14 |
| marvelous clear bawdyhouse | 06/13/14 |
| disrespectful bearded brunch macaca | 06/13/14 |
| Dashing Resort Rigpig | 06/26/14 |
| topaz contagious associate | 12/07/14 |
| topaz contagious associate | 03/28/15 |
| Comical crawly hall corn cake | 03/28/15 |
| Ivory stage dragon | 03/28/15 |
| marvelous clear bawdyhouse | 04/04/15 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 08/05/15 |
| multi-colored umber den | 11/07/16 |
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| Appetizing Irate School Stock Car | 07/24/16 |
| spruce heaven pervert | 04/09/21 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 08/06/15 |
| cerebral rusted parlour personal credit line | 07/13/19 |
| Talking domesticated main people trailer park | 08/07/15 |
| spruce heaven pervert | 08/15/15 |
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| Talking domesticated main people trailer park | 09/08/15 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 10/08/15 |
| spectacular piazza | 10/08/15 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 10/08/15 |
| Exhilarant olive messiness | 10/08/15 |
| Talking domesticated main people trailer park | 12/17/15 |
| disrespectful bearded brunch macaca | 12/17/15 |
| self-absorbed university roast beef | 03/14/16 |
| Ocher fragrant field | 03/14/16 |
| Nofapping shitlib death wish | 03/14/16 |
| Dashing Resort Rigpig | 04/17/16 |
| Dun Aromatic Selfie | 05/03/16 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 05/12/16 |
| Green provocative whorehouse telephone | 05/16/16 |
| Appetizing Irate School Stock Car | 05/31/16 |
| primrose filthy cuckoldry hell | 09/15/16 |
| mahogany yapping bbw | 11/07/16 |
| Pea-brained space international law enforcement agency | 11/29/16 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 02/16/17 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 05/22/17 |
| topaz contagious associate | 06/02/17 |
| Deep ticket booth incel | 06/02/17 |
| Talking domesticated main people trailer park | 08/30/17 |
| costumed meetinghouse police squad | 09/06/17 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 04/30/18 |
| vermilion thriller friendly grandma | 05/13/18 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 11/16/18 |
| cerebral rusted parlour personal credit line | 09/07/19 |
| trip slate halford | 09/07/19 |
| Godawful dilemma juggernaut | 11/15/19 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 12/25/19 |
| at-the-ready stubborn legend | 12/25/19 |
| glittery sickened gaming laptop | 12/25/19 |
| vermilion thriller friendly grandma | 12/25/19 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 01/30/20 |
| irradiated double fault stag film | 03/10/20 |
| cerebral rusted parlour personal credit line | 03/24/20 |
| citrine office | 04/01/20 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 08/10/20 |
| cerebral rusted parlour personal credit line | 10/19/20 |
| useless church building | 06/13/21 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 06/13/21 |
| glittery sickened gaming laptop | 06/15/21 |
| useless church building | 08/22/21 |
| Chestnut Menage | 08/31/21 |
| useless church building | 05/23/22 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 02/09/23 |
| Exciting Red Milk Garrison | 10/31/23 |
| Territorial concupiscible public bath | 06/21/24 |
| cerebral rusted parlour personal credit line | 02/09/25 |
| orange tanning salon internal respiration | 03/27/25 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: June 11th, 2014 11:36 PM Author: abusive boltzmann business firm (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733527) |
Date: June 11th, 2014 11:38 PM Author: Vigorous library You should've been a comedy writer (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733532) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:38 PM Author: Obsidian foreskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733535) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:39 PM Author: topaz contagious associate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733537) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:40 PM Author: Vigorous library Suze: "sir, can I ask how tall you are."
*very long pause*
Robot/monster voice: " five nine" |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:40 PM Author: topaz contagious associate LOL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733551) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:41 PM Author: abusive boltzmann business firm laughing & convlusing & foamign at mouth at work lmfao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733555) |
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Date: April 4th, 2015 3:56 PM Author: infuriating razzle cruise ship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#27619755) |
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Date: June 11th, 2014 11:59 PM Author: Geriatric Home Preventive Strike (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733697) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 12:11 AM Author: Dashing Resort Rigpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25733775) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:22 PM Author: Vigorous library (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25738401) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:23 PM Author: glittery sickened gaming laptop (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25738402) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:23 PM Author: talented mint turdskin striped hyena (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25738403) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:36 PM Author: costumed meetinghouse police squad holy shit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25738512) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 6:38 PM Author: Fear-inspiring step-uncle's house Holy shit screaming/vomiting (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25738527) |
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Date: June 12th, 2014 8:23 PM Author: Vigorous library JFC (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25739208) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:10 PM Author: Geriatric Home Preventive Strike i really dont know why but this cracks me the eff up (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25743978) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:22 PM Author: topaz contagious associate Well to start, you have Suze Orman neighing a complete non-sequitur of a question that hits at the linchpin of Johnsmeyer's tragic character: his height. Who knows why that has come up? Maybe PAYE? Maybe estate planning re a farm with gold statues? Maybe what to do with his minor league performance bonus? So we get a brilliant start.
Then we get stuck in the long pause purgatory, but it's a good purgatory. We know what might happen next and on first read, 8 times out of 10 we'll guess correctly. But during the long pause your anticipation wells up. You can envision Johnsmeyer nervously fumbling with the Scream robot voice machine pressed against an old landline phone with a curly cord that's way, way too long in a dark Manhattan basement closet apartment, thinking of whether to answer truthfully and whether the Scream robot voice machine is actually working to cover his identity. It's not that he's weird, he's just shy, a little embarrassed and wants anonymity. It's really absurd, but you give the little guy the benefit of the doubt and hope he doesn't hang up out of fear while pissing his pants. Besides, chances are he already pissed his pants after the big Suze asked him about his relationship status, which prompted him to look up at an out of focus picture of some girl named Dutchess that's the only thing on his otherwise bare windowless walls.
You see all this in the long pause which is then pierced by the Scream robot voice as it responds "five nine" which is hilarious because it's earnestly delivered in such an bizarre manner. You can hear the voice clearly in your head while envisioning Johnsmeyer in his apartment and Suze and her producers in the studio wondering wtf kind of savant is on the other end of the line. But it's doubly hilarious because we all know Johnsy boy is really five seven, on a good day. |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:25 PM Author: Vigorous library TY FOR YOUR SERVICE (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744029) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:29 PM Author: Vigorous library (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744049) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:30 PM Author: Dashing Resort Rigpig Poast of the year (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744051) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:31 PM Author: opaque hideous people who are hurt crackhouse this is scholarship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744053) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:32 PM Author: Geriatric Home Preventive Strike Loool 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744063) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:35 PM Author: big-titted bateful hissy fit suze orman keeping steady, unconcerned eye contact into the camera during the pause (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744079) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:42 PM Author: white pocket flask I read this with the Charlie Kelly voice (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744101) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:53 PM Author: costumed meetinghouse police squad whoa (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744164) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:59 PM Author: glittery sickened gaming laptop (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25744191) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 8:33 PM Author: disrespectful bearded brunch macaca (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25745855) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 10:55 PM Author: abusive boltzmann business firm (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25746687) |
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Date: February 14th, 2015 5:47 PM Author: disrespectful bearded brunch macaca (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#27315083) |
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Date: April 4th, 2015 4:04 PM Author: Ocher fragrant field 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#27619800) |
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Date: August 5th, 2015 10:01 PM Author: Deep ticket booth incel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28487531) |
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Date: August 5th, 2015 11:57 PM Author: pearly mother (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28488640) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:24 AM Author: Talking domesticated main people trailer park (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28489891) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:28 AM Author: shimmering supple useless brakes trust fund lol you're like the judge who wrote the Pepsi Points opinion from 1L contracts (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28489907) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 9:39 AM Author: Grizzly Orchestra Pit Place Of Business How did I miss this? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28489936) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 10:43 AM Author: Copper Goal In Life (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28490163) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 1:33 PM Author: spruce heaven pervert (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28491214) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 1:34 PM Author: mustard set (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28491223) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 11:56 PM Author: Arousing Adulterous Old Irish Cottage Black Woman there is some true comedic talent on this bort (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28497490) |
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Date: August 6th, 2015 11:59 PM Author: dead up-to-no-good dingle berry toaster lol damn dude, nice work (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28497522) |
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Date: October 8th, 2015 6:05 AM Author: spruce heaven pervert the real important part is that this only took 12 minutes to write (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28924462) |
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Date: October 8th, 2015 6:39 AM Author: Odious sable quadroon principal's office curly phone cord that's way too long really hit home (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#28924483) |
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Date: November 18th, 2015 3:44 PM Author: khaki corner fat ankles (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#29207618) |
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Date: November 18th, 2015 3:48 PM Author: Appetizing Irate School Stock Car (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#29207642) |
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Date: December 17th, 2015 5:19 PM Author: Deep ticket booth incel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#29401582) |
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Date: December 17th, 2015 5:24 PM Author: pearly mother (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#29401618) |
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Date: March 14th, 2016 12:56 AM Author: Nofapping shitlib death wish (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#30051818) |
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Date: May 31st, 2016 3:10 PM Author: Talking domesticated main people trailer park (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#30594657) |
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Date: May 31st, 2016 3:17 PM Author: Pea-brained space international law enforcement agency (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#30594696) |
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Date: July 24th, 2016 9:14 AM Author: Dashing Resort Rigpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#31014517) |
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Date: November 29th, 2016 6:59 PM Author: Honey-headed jap hominid (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#32018277) |
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Date: June 2nd, 2017 8:48 AM Author: unhinged theater stage (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#33453658) |
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Date: June 3rd, 2017 12:59 PM Author: Indigo Base Tank ljl at anyone who says this place hasn't gone downhill with all the politics and crypto spam (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#33463157) |
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Date: December 10th, 2018 10:08 AM Author: Peach deranged shrine (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#37381941) |
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Date: January 29th, 2018 10:12 PM Author: Translucent Low-t Boistinker Coffee Pot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#35273685) |
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Date: May 13th, 2018 9:50 PM Author: Aphrodisiac ruby athletic conference multi-billionaire (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#36044055) |
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Date: December 10th, 2018 10:08 AM Author: Peach deranged shrine (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#37381939) |
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Date: June 25th, 2019 4:51 AM Author: Flesh affirmative action this poa was clearly made w/ genuine love (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#38436191) |
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Date: December 25th, 2019 5:59 PM Author: topaz contagious associate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#39324796) |
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Date: December 30th, 2019 8:37 PM Author: disrespectful bearded brunch macaca this is the best poast on xo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#39352602) |
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Date: February 2nd, 2020 5:38 PM Author: Glassy Abode Boiling Water (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#39529036) |
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Date: June 26th, 2020 5:32 PM Author: citrine office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#40501651) |
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Date: March 27th, 2021 12:19 AM Author: charismatic senate twinkling uncleanness (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#42172476) |
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Date: June 15th, 2021 9:43 PM Author: Galvanic really tough guy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#42634165) |
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Date: June 21st, 2024 6:27 PM Author: topaz contagious associate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#47767334) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 3:12 PM Author: Laughsome gas station feces (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2591258&forum_id=2Elisa#25743993) |
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Date: June 13th, 2014 4:12 PM Author: Wine locale prole Suze purses her lips, furrows her brow and nods her head sympathetically. She says 'Wellll...' in a manner indicating that she won't be able to provide any helpful advice.
*Audible click from phone, then dial tone*
Suze: "Well it looks like we lost 'Duke' from New York".
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