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uncle called out my toupee at sunday dinner

i tried to brush him off, but he'd been drinking a lot of wi...
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
next time just say "its a HAIR SYSTEM, not a toupee&quo...
Deep Candlestick Maker Temple
  08/25/24
the whole point is that i dont want anybody to know lol
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
be a man, OWN it, say its a HAIR SYSTEM. emphasize it. th...
Deep Candlestick Maker Temple
  08/25/24
man, i wish i could be that brave
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
poast pics of your HAIR SYSTEM and we can let you know if it...
Deep Candlestick Maker Temple
  08/25/24
let me just assure you that my system is VERY good
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
i can hear my grandmother crying in the kitchen about the sa...
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
she's crying about your hair
lascivious personal credit line school
  08/26/24
...
maine is 180
  09/21/24
...
just be racist
  09/21/24
vacuum just started up. i guess they have to get the pumpkin...
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
...
maine is 180
  09/21/24
imagined this as a skit from I Think You Should Leave
concupiscible tripping theater stage
  08/25/24
unfortunately, this is my life
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
INT. UNCLE LEO’S HOUSE - DINNER TIME The dining roo...
Deep Candlestick Maker Temple
  08/25/24
exactly
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
I'm totally bald and everyone knows it. I haven't experienc...
Zombie-like public bath selfie
  08/25/24
get a system
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/25/24
It's too late for me
Zombie-like public bath selfie
  08/25/24
rude!
Irradiated Kink-friendly Laser Beams Skinny Woman
  08/25/24
...
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  08/26/24
...
Snowy Coldplay Fan Station
  08/26/24
...
diverse brunch dragon
  08/26/24
...
Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit
  09/04/24
...
tim heidegger
  09/21/24
Omg im fucking dying right now 🤣🤣🤣
maine is 180
  09/21/24
...
queensbridge benzo
  09/21/24


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:50 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

i tried to brush him off, but he'd been drinking a lot of wine and was kinda ornery. so he just kept hammering at me, even when other people tried to steer the conversation to other topics. finally i got pissed and yelled "THIS IS MY FUCKING HAIR". he got up and tried to get me in a headlock so he could rip off my toupee. i was twisting and jerking like a chicken and ended up kicking over a bowl of salad near the edge of the table. just as i was wriggling free he got his nails under the mesh a little bit in the front and pulled the toupee up a bit. i yelled "MY EYE" and covered my eye with two hands, so that they also covered the ripped part of the hairline. then i ran to the bathroom. poasting from there now. i don't think anybody noticed the rip in the melee.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007160)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:52 PM
Author: Deep Candlestick Maker Temple

next time just say "its a HAIR SYSTEM, not a toupee"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007168)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:53 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

the whole point is that i dont want anybody to know lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007173)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:59 PM
Author: Deep Candlestick Maker Temple

be a man, OWN it, say its a HAIR SYSTEM. emphasize it.

then show them pics w and wo it and they will be amazed at how much better you look.

start a local chapter and champion HAIR SYSTEMS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007202)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:59 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

man, i wish i could be that brave

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007208)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 7:01 PM
Author: Deep Candlestick Maker Temple

poast pics of your HAIR SYSTEM and we can let you know if its actually passable, it doesnt even need to be on your head

quality varies VASTLY from different providers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007223)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 7:34 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

let me just assure you that my system is VERY good

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007331)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:53 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

i can hear my grandmother crying in the kitchen about the salad :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007175)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 26th, 2024 10:26 AM
Author: lascivious personal credit line school

she's crying about your hair

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48009040)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 4:54 PM
Author: maine is 180



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117548)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 4:54 PM
Author: just be racist



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117550)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 6:58 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

vacuum just started up. i guess they have to get the pumpkin seeds from the salad out of the carpet

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007198)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 5:12 PM
Author: maine is 180



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117610)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 7:37 PM
Author: concupiscible tripping theater stage

imagined this as a skit from I Think You Should Leave

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007347)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 8:03 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

unfortunately, this is my life

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007416)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 8:35 PM
Author: Deep Candlestick Maker Temple

INT. UNCLE LEO’S HOUSE - DINNER TIME

The dining room is bustling with activity. The table is filled with various dishes, and the aroma of home-cooked food fills the air. Kramer, Jerry, and George are seated at the table with Uncle Leo, who is enthusiastically serving food.

Uncle Leo: (excitedly) Alright, everyone! Dig in! Tonight’s dinner is extra special.

Kramer: (nervously) Thanks, Uncle Leo. Everything looks amazing.

Jerry: (eyeing the spread) Yeah, you really went all out.

George: (scooping some salad onto his plate) This salad looks great. What’s the secret?

Uncle Leo: (proudly) Ah, just a little something I whipped up. Nothing fancy.

The conversation continues as everyone serves themselves. Uncle Leo occasionally glances at Kramer’s toupee with a scrutinizing look.

Uncle Leo: (casually) You know, Kramer, I’ve been meaning to ask you something.

Kramer: (hesitantly) Oh? What’s that, Uncle Leo?

Uncle Leo: (squinting) Are you sure that’s not a toupee you’re wearing?

Kramer: (nervously) What? No, no. It’s all mine!

Uncle Leo: (squinting even harder) I’m not so sure. It looks a bit… different.

Jerry: (smirking) Uncle Leo’s got a keen eye for these things.

George: (whispering to Jerry) I have a bad feeling about this.

Uncle Leo’s eyes narrow, and he leans in closer to Kramer.

Uncle Leo: (suspiciously) Kramer, I’m telling you, it looks like a toupee. Let me just—

Without warning, Uncle Leo reaches out and yanks at Kramer’s toupee. Kramer gasps as his toupee is ripped off, sending a bowl of salad flying off the edge of the table. The salad lands in a heap on the floor.

Kramer: (shocked) Hey! What the—?

The room falls silent as everyone stares at Kramer’s exposed head. Kramer’s face turns red as he scrambles to cover his head with his hands. In his panic, he knocks over his chair and stumbles backward.

Jerry: (trying not to laugh) Oh, boy. This is something.

George: (to Jerry) This is a disaster!

Kramer: (frantically) I’m, uh, I’m just going to the restroom!

Kramer rushes out of the room, leaving a trail of confusion and salad. He slams the restroom door behind him and stares at himself in the mirror, desperately trying to reattach his toupee.

INT. RESTROOM - CONTINUOUS

Kramer fumbles with the toupee, trying to make it stick. He’s sweating and his hands are shaking.

Kramer: (muttering to himself) Come on, come on. Just stick, will ya?

Outside, the commotion has drawn everyone’s attention.

Uncle Leo: (calling out) Kramer, everything okay in there?

Jerry: (trying to be helpful) Uh, he’s just freshening up. Give him a minute.

George: (shaking his head) This is one dinner I won’t forget.

INT. RESTROOM - MOMENTS LATER

Kramer manages to fix the toupee, though it’s slightly askew. He takes a deep breath and opens the door, stepping back into the dining room. Everyone looks at him, trying to act normal.

Kramer: (trying to sound nonchalant) Everything’s fine now. Just needed a little, uh, touch-up.

Uncle Leo: (awkwardly) Well, Kramer, I guess I owe you an apology. I didn’t mean to cause a scene.

Jerry: (smiling) Don’t worry about it, Uncle Leo. It’s all part of the fun.

George: (sitting back down) Yeah, it’s not every day you get a free salad toss.

The dinner resumes, though the mood is decidedly awkward. Kramer keeps a hand on his toupee, glancing around nervously. Uncle Leo tries to make amends by offering more food.

Uncle Leo: (nervously) Help yourselves to more salad. I’ll, uh, clean up the mess.

Jerry: (to Kramer) Well, at least you didn’t lose your toupee completely.

Kramer: (sighing) Yeah, but I’m going to have to keep a closer eye on Uncle Leo from now on.

The scene ends with Kramer tentatively rejoining the table, while Uncle Leo scrambles to clean up the mess and everyone tries to act like the earlier incident never happened.

FADE OUT.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007530)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 9:37 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

exactly

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007766)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 9:44 PM
Author: Zombie-like public bath selfie

I'm totally bald and everyone knows it. I haven't experienced anything but contempt from other people in years

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007779)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 9:51 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit

get a system

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007799)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 10:07 PM
Author: Zombie-like public bath selfie

It's too late for me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007853)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 25th, 2024 10:06 PM
Author: Irradiated Kink-friendly Laser Beams Skinny Woman

rude!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48007850)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 26th, 2024 11:31 AM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48009340)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 26th, 2024 11:35 AM
Author: Snowy Coldplay Fan Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48009354)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 26th, 2024 11:36 AM
Author: diverse brunch dragon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48009361)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 4th, 2024 1:23 PM
Author: Stirring Lavender Orchestra Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48048172)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 4:53 PM
Author: tim heidegger



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117545)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 4:54 PM
Author: maine is 180

Omg im fucking dying right now

🤣🤣🤣

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117552)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2024 5:15 PM
Author: queensbridge benzo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5583047&forum_id=2Elisa#48117613)