https://www.businessinsider.com/stay-at-home-dad-female-breadwinner-wife-took-her-name-2025-3

I'm a stay-at-home dad who took my wife's last name. She manages our finances while I run our household.

As told to Kaila Yu Mar 13, 2025, 4:05 AM CT

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A couple poses for a photo in front of a flower patch.

Courtesy of William Harrington

William Harrington became a stay-at-home dad to support his wife's career growth.

Her career in digital management outpaced childcare costs, which prompted the decision.

When they married in 2022, William took his wife's last name. He now helps her with her company.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with William Harrington, a stay-at-home dad from Lewisville, Texas. It's been edited for length and clarity.

I met my wife, Heather, through mutual friends in 2010. I was 19 and homeless, and she, at 21, was raising two small children on her own. When she offered me a place to stay, what started as kindness blossomed quickly into love after just two weeks.

Heather's children immediately became a cherished part of my life. I went from not having much in the world to being a young stepparent. As a stepkid myself, I wanted to provide the permanency and stability I lacked while growing up. Heather was waitressing at the time while she taught herself to code.

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She now supports our entire family of five, and I stay home to care for the kids and run the household.

By the time we had our third child, one of us needed to stay home

In 2012, after two years together, I got a job as an opening manager at Sonic, working 55 to 60 hours weekly.

Shortly before that, my wife landed her first big job as a digital experience manager at an advertising agency.

Around this time, she got pregnant with our youngest. We weighed the childcare options versus my pay and my wife's, as Heather earned more, and childcare was more expensive than what I made. As Heather's career was quickly ascending, we decided it would be best if I quit my job and stayed home.

Running a house is constant work

At home, I ensure the kids get to school and all their needs are met, and I take care of all house chores and cooking.

Many people in my life imagine I've got all this free time and am doing nothing. Family can be particularly judgmental. Once, a relative asked me, "When will you be a man?" Navigating societal expectations and stereotypes about gender roles can sometimes feel like an uphill battle.

It's hard to be your own cheerleader sometimes with that criticism. Social isolation can also be challenging, as my daily environment doesn't provide the adult interactions I once had in a traditional work setting. When I reflect, I remember my fantastic relationship with my kids, which is stronger than anything I had with my parents.

In March 2017, we bought our first house

Over the next few years, Heather quickly moved from manager to director to vice president and eventually chief digital officer of two companies.

Buying our first house was a significant milestone because I was the first grandchild in our family to own a home. It was such a gift to our children to move from a two-bedroom apartment into a four-bedroom house.

My wife has made six figures for the past seven years, and it covers all our expenses and then some. Having all your bills paid is a unique feeling, but I'm also starting to build a new career path.

In 2019, I started massage school part time and got my degree. I've always been interested in how the human body works and felt connected to healing.

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We married in September 2022

I admire her so much that I even took her last name.

In 2023, Heather started her company, Level Up Digital, a marketing and technology development agency.

In addition to my massage work, I've been helping by learning to build websites, write blog content, and manage digital property. I've never been great at managing money, so I give any funds to my wife so she can handle it wisely.

Working together has been smoother than I expected. It doesn't mean it's always easy, but we check in, take breaks, and make time for our family. I've gained new titles and credibility in the eyes of those who judged me for being a stay-at-home dad.

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Home life now is fantastic

Since Heather works from home, we can balance cooking and parenting. As the kids get older, I want to open my own business and brand for massage therapy. I'm most excited about joining in and helping Heather with her business.

We're so happy to be able to give our kids every opportunity they deserve, and I'm excited about the future of Heather's growing agency.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5694137&forum_id=2Elisa#48747482)

https://www.businessinsider.com/author/kaila-yu

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5694137&forum_id=2Elisa#48747489)