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Twas the Night Before Christmas (Peterman version)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J ...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/03/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/03/18
TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy ...
Galvanic party of the first part
  12/03/18
ty!
Titillating slippery hell
  12/03/18
jfc, this was 180. This is why I continue to visit this d...
arousing school
  12/03/18
...
mustard thriller lodge double fault
  12/24/21
...
Razzle codepig
  12/03/18
...
Seedy exhilarant jew area
  12/03/18
...
Big orchid kitchen
  12/03/18
...
bearded orchestra pit kitty cat
  12/03/18
...
arousing school
  12/03/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/07/18
...
Magenta confused parlour nowag
  12/07/18
...
Gaped parlor headpube
  12/07/18
...
180 Insanely Creepy Mediation Library
  12/07/18
...
Frozen dilemma athletic conference
  12/07/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/14/18
...
carmine boistinker
  12/14/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/18
...
Razzle codepig
  12/24/18
...
offensive cruise ship philosopher-king
  12/24/18
To be fair, What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vu...
zombie-like bateful theatre sandwich
  12/24/18
120
bespoke native elastic band
  12/24/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/18
...
bespoke native elastic band
  12/24/18
...
slap-happy maniacal home rigor
  12/24/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/18
...
Aggressive haunted graveyard
  12/24/18
Artistic gold tyvmft
rebellious effete corner private investor
  12/24/18
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/16/21
...
Apoplectic ocher hall round eye
  12/24/18
...
Know-it-all territorial affirmative action menage
  12/24/18
this was pretty good, nice work
topaz idiotic idiot
  12/24/18
~*Christmas in July bump*~
Titillating slippery hell
  07/01/19
...
Razzle codepig
  07/01/19
...
Razzle codepig
  07/01/19
Early December Bump
Titillating slippery hell
  12/10/19
getting close...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/20/19
ding ding ding
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
...
Unholy Knife Volcanic Crater
  12/24/19
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
...
slate scourge upon the earth corn cake
  12/24/19
This deserves more bumps.
Peach Center
  12/24/19
...
Azure costumed coldplay fan
  12/24/19
lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180
rebellious effete corner private investor
  12/24/19
lol
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
This
mustard thriller lodge double fault
  12/24/21
Missed this the first time. Great work dude. 180
swashbuckling doobsian rigpig reading party
  12/24/19
ty, labor of love
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
...
dark preventive strike
  12/24/19
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
lube up your chimneys!
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
pure gold 180
mustard thriller lodge double fault
  12/24/19
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/19
...
French misunderstood quadroon hospital
  12/24/19
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/15/20
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/23/20
...
dashing cruel-hearted son of senegal death wish
  12/24/20
It's time.
Titillating slippery hell
  12/24/20
...
Gaped parlor headpube
  12/24/20
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/16/21
...
slap-happy maniacal home rigor
  12/16/21
...
dashing cruel-hearted son of senegal death wish
  12/16/21
Chri$tmas $pirit
Titillating slippery hell
  12/20/21
Lmao
marvelous abode roast beef
  12/20/21
...
Titillating slippery hell
  12/22/21
...
marvelous abode roast beef
  12/22/21
...
excitant macaca
  12/24/21
...
mustard thriller lodge double fault
  12/25/23
...
grown men with poopy butt cracks
  12/25/25
...
nude butt cheeks
  12/25/25
...
constantscreen the great
  12/25/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J

Lots of truckers were hungry, much like any old day;

The rig pigs were hung, taking dick pics with care,

In hopes that St. Peterman soon would be there;

The truckers were horny, dicks throbbing and red ,

While visions of Peter’s plums danced in their heads;

And Earl in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down longing for Peterman’s gap,

When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the truck to see what was the matter.

Away to the lot I flew like a flash,

Tore open my zipper in hope of fresh gash.

The moon on the breast of the softly lit J

Made the lot lizards glow, all looking to play,

When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a beady-eyed Peterman, and eight tiny trans-queers,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this night would be sick.

More rapid than eagles out their trousers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, FLASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, ROCKET ! on CUPID! on, BONER and SHITZEN!

To the back of the truck! to the top of the wall!

Now suck away! suck away! fuck away all!"

As lubed holes that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with a cock, were mounted to the sky,

So up to the truck-stops the trans-queers they flew,

With the sleigh full of boys, and St. Peterman too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little poof.

As he jerked with his hand, and was turning around,

“Stuff my chimney!” said St. Peterman on the ground.

He was dressed all in latex, from his head to his foot,

His knees were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of dildos he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just lifting his sac.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his boihole like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin had cum white as snow;

The stump of my pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And his lips did encircle its head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

His broad backside shook like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

We filled all their “stockings” and had circle jerks,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

A huge snort of cocaine billowed up and rose;

Then he sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all pranced like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, CASH AND CHECKS ARE ALL-RIGHT!"

Happy December, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.

Upset Jew, 12-03-2018



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37342568)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:00 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343357)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:04 PM
Author: Galvanic party of the first part

TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy this pity bump as my Chanukah present to you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343380)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:10 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

ty!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343413)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:16 PM
Author: arousing school

jfc, this was 180.

This is why I continue to visit this demented chatbort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343471)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:53 PM
Author: mustard thriller lodge double fault



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43670143)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: Razzle codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343477)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: Seedy exhilarant jew area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343484)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Big orchid kitchen



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: bearded orchestra pit kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343515)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: arousing school



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37343539)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37367063)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:39 AM
Author: Magenta confused parlour nowag



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37367091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:50 AM
Author: Gaped parlor headpube



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37367151)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: 180 Insanely Creepy Mediation Library



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37367159)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:55 AM
Author: Frozen dilemma athletic conference



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37367178)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:12 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37407273)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:15 PM
Author: carmine boistinker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37407292)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Razzle codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462612)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:41 AM
Author: offensive cruise ship philosopher-king



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462615)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:44 AM
Author: zombie-like bateful theatre sandwich

To be fair,

What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vulgar and sexually explicit manner for “laughs”? Why I’ve never

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462619)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:52 AM
Author: bespoke native elastic band

120

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 7:44 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37465688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:47 AM
Author: bespoke native elastic band



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462629)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:54 AM
Author: slap-happy maniacal home rigor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462649)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:46 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37462815)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:02 PM
Author: Aggressive haunted graveyard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37465757)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: rebellious effete corner private investor

Artistic gold tyvmft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37466002)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 12:45 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43619656)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:30 PM
Author: Apoplectic ocher hall round eye



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37466012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: Know-it-all territorial affirmative action menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37466032)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: topaz idiotic idiot

this was pretty good, nice work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#37466049)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

~*Christmas in July bump*~

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#38469719)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Razzle codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#38469721)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Razzle codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#38469720)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2019 9:37 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

Early December Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39241607)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2019 12:21 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

getting close...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39297740)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:18 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

ding ding ding

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39316620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:38 AM
Author: Unholy Knife Volcanic Crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39316668)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:42 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317383)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:49 AM
Author: slate scourge upon the earth corn cake



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:52 AM
Author: Peach Center

This deserves more bumps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317415)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:07 AM
Author: Azure costumed coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:14 AM
Author: rebellious effete corner private investor

lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:57 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39318060)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:54 PM
Author: mustard thriller lodge double fault

This

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43670148)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:30 AM
Author: swashbuckling doobsian rigpig reading party

Missed this the first time. Great work dude.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39317610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:58 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

ty, labor of love

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39318062)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:02 AM
Author: dark preventive strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39318085)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:51 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39318318)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 1:48 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

lube up your chimneys!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39318901)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:19 PM
Author: mustard thriller lodge double fault

pure gold 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39319682)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 5:57 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39320155)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:29 PM
Author: French misunderstood quadroon hospital



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#39319749)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2020 2:54 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#41553760)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 23rd, 2020 1:37 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#41603653)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 8:07 AM
Author: dashing cruel-hearted son of senegal death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#41608882)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:14 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

It's time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#41610330)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:19 PM
Author: Gaped parlor headpube



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#41610375)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43618689)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:32 AM
Author: slap-happy maniacal home rigor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43619119)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: dashing cruel-hearted son of senegal death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43619130)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:21 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell

Chri$tmas $pirit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43643241)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:27 PM
Author: marvelous abode roast beef

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43643299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 5:59 PM
Author: Titillating slippery hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43658914)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 6:53 PM
Author: marvelous abode roast beef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43659259)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:49 PM
Author: excitant macaca



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#43670127)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2023 11:04 AM
Author: mustard thriller lodge double fault



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#47211358)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: grown men with poopy butt cracks



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#49538706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:10 AM
Author: nude butt cheeks (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#49538932)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:14 AM
Author: constantscreen the great



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2Reputation#49538935)