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as primary earner why even let wife see all the money?
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:31 PM Author: disrespectful business firm establish joint checking and a joint cc so she can spend an appropriate amount and feel like "she's paying the bills" when she writes a check, and keep the rest in "401k" ie a combination of 401k and your own checking and savings (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036653) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:52 PM Author: razzle hateful corner what about when both are working? I assume the norm is to keep separate finances. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036785) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:54 PM Author: disrespectful business firm I don't think that is the norm, obviously it's what I'm suggesting (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036793) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:57 PM Author: razzle hateful corner it's pretty tough to hide your money as the guy. she'll always know your salary and keep records of what your worth is at any time. best is to "blow" a few k each month. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036810) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:58 PM Author: disrespectful business firm how would she do that if you don't give her the paystubs? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036816) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:02 PM Author: razzle hateful corner tax returns? ultimately all that info will be available in the divorce. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036843) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:19 PM Author: Mischievous green national private investor Because deception is not a solid foundation for marriage. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036953) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:20 PM Author: soul-stirring overrated home sandwich But it's the only foundation. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036957) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:21 PM Author: Mischievous green national private investor no wai bro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036969) |
Date: November 13th, 2012 5:48 PM Author: Comical jew stage if U fail to look after your 401k, upon which she too will be depending, she will almost certainly fail to look after it for you. all the moreso when she is not a significant breadwinner. my mother never had to work, and so she never did. my father always looked after his earnings and never bothered divulging his financial aspects to my mother. she would inherit a few hundred thousand and poof! that would be spent within ten years. meanwhile good ole dad just kept chuggin' along and now they (are still together and) have income on which to live, but if dad had been stupid or acted like money grows on trees i.e. followed his wife's example, omfg they would be dependent on my sister and me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036762) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:50 PM Author: disrespectful business firm this is almost incomprehensible, but I take your point to be that if your dad had lost all of his money, like his dumb wife would have, he would have been worse off than if he had let his dumb wife lose all of his money for him? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036777) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:58 PM Author: Comical jew stage lol, that's almost incomprehensible to me.
no, my point was, as one who is the sole breadwinner should take COMPLETE control over ALL his earnings, e.g. leaving his spouse in the dark about 'their' 401k, so too should you establish separate checking accounts, because there's no need for her to peer into your financial details when she, however gainfully employed, still is not even close to being the primary breadwinner. |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:53 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People not quite sure how couples even get into the discussion about salary, etc.
it's clear in my relationship that I am the earnings loser, but I can't even imagine asking my bf how much he makes.
do women/men flat out ask this of one another?
lifenoob here.
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:56 PM Author: disrespectful business firm bishes be demanding dat paper once dey have dat ring (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036800) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:57 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People it's all very confusing. I swear there's a 50/50 split about finances across couples I've asked about how they manage once they get married.
it'd be great if there was a clear guide for success, amirite? |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:56 PM Author: razzle hateful corner as the woman, you're supposed to suggest merging accounts for practical reasons. if your husband is beta enough he'll be afraid to challenge it for fear that you'll say he doesn't trust you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036802) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:58 PM Author: lascivious nowag um... how do you seriously date someone for more than say 4-6 months and not know how much money they make? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036820) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:58 PM Author: milky sickened electric furnace because he is filthy rich and just pays for everything. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036822) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 5:59 PM Author: lascivious nowag apparently. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036826) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:01 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People you are such a h8er. how did I get in your bad graces? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036837) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:03 PM Author: milky sickened electric furnace nope good for you. If he has money and insists on paying for everything then you are fine. But yeah once you are engaged you shoudl probably talk about finances. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036848) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:06 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People we talk about finances and how we see ourselves spending and what we care about a lot/don't care about, short-term and long-term savings plans and the such, but I've never said, "oh hey, btw, how much do you make?"
am I really so out of touch because of this?
also, he doesn't pay for everything. I pick up a chipotle burrito bowl here or there, pal. |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:26 PM Author: milky sickened electric furnace how cute. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22037009) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:00 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People don't ask? please suggest how to learn this information since it seems so appalling to you that I am not privy to it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036835) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:04 PM Author: milky sickened electric furnace It would be a bigger deal if you both had to spend money on things and plan.
I dont think Zuckerbergs wife needs to know how much he has in his bank account at any time. |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:00 PM Author: Pearly hilarious regret I have a joint account with wifey (we both work). Shit like bills, groceries, vacations, mortgage etc get paid through the joint account which we contribute to 50/50. Everything else is separate. We both use the same financial advisor and obviously coordinate our retirement and investment decisions, but everything is still separate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036831) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:02 PM Author: Demanding grizzly half-breed range Why marry at all? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036841) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:02 PM Author: Pearly hilarious regret tcq. To be fair, she is a 180 lady and has a multi-million $$ trust fund. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036844) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:03 PM Author: razzle hateful corner your financial advisor sucks. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036849) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:04 PM Author: Pearly hilarious regret csb (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036851) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:09 PM Author: Deranged beady-eyed quadroon circlehead Wife doesnt work i give her an allowance of $500/mo for food, gas, and any discretionary spending. Everything else stays in my account. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036882) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:18 PM Author: razzle hateful corner lol, sure (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036947) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:19 PM Author: Indigo Aphrodisiac Main People is the food fun food or groceries food? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036954) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:16 PM Author: abusive university philosopher-king I am more concerned about a gals debt than her income. Last thing i want is a lazy bish who has tons of debt and looking for a guy to save her (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036934) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:21 PM Author: apoplectic diverse twinkling uncleanness kitty If you have a spendthrift wife and you are frugal all the gimmicks in the world won't save you from mutual resentment and lots of disagreement. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22036962) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:27 PM Author: abusive university philosopher-king This is very true (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22037015) |
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Date: November 13th, 2012 6:33 PM Author: marvelous tripping church cr also the trick is to both be frugal. The definition of marriage is an agreement of two parties to engage in a social contract that benefits the children and the household in the long term. This means saving. Eating out at P.F Changs every week does not meet this definition. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22037078) |
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Date: November 14th, 2012 5:42 PM Author: Duck-like Fighting Roast Beef Eating at pf changs once a week destroys this? Dont ppl do a lot worse? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#22044453) |
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Date: March 26th, 2019 1:04 AM Author: Glassy Arrogant Bbw ITT: battered husband syndrome (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2113163&forum_id=2#37991496) |