You are marathon fucking an IFNB groupie and starting to gas out so you lay out a fat line of coke on her tramp stamp, rail that thing and then TAKE THAT ANAL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161439)

After the Rohypnol is kicking in and she can't move you slip on a cock ring shaped like a crown and jerk off on her face while your red pubes tickle her nose.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161447)

You meet a pretty lady, get some dirt on her, and bring her back to your place. You explain to her you'll release her files to the public unless she lets you wear her clothes as she fucks you in the ass with a strap on. You can cum extra-hard if she's crying during all of this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161462)

This is simply surfing beeg on your smartphone in the stall at work and jerking off while thinking of that tight little intern who keeps making eye contact with you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161465)

This is a complex maneuver in which you hog tie a black woman, ride her and cum in her face 6 times then wash it off with some whiskey. While smoking your post-coitus cigarette you kill and Indian.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161480)

You slam 10 shots of hard alcohol, do a line of coke and chew 5 viagras. Once all the chemicals have kicked in you pick a wet spot and fuck it until you puke.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161499)

This is just doggystyle sex with your socks on while watching reruns of The Osmond Show.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161507)

Your partner helps you reach your climate using his choice of either jelly or syrup. It's possible to mutually Dickey Simpkins in a modified 69 pose.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161514)

While blacking out from too much booze and probably some date rape drugs in the bath house you experience snapshots of the following:

1) you cumming in a dude's ass without a condom,

2) a dude cumming in your mouth,

3) someone fucking you in your ass (but was he wearing a condom?)

A variation of this called the "(actual STIMMED faggot)" involves inhaling poppers and nitrous whenever your mouth isn't filled with cock.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161533)

Wearing a rubber body suit with your girlfriend dressed in all flannel you viciously fuck in missionary position. When you are both about to cum you touch her forehead with your exposed finger delivering a huge static shock that enhances both your orgasms.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161542)

This is actually how the AIDS virus got started. You beat a monkey out of a tree and stomp it until it's unconscious, then you place your AK-47 in its mouth and viciously fuck its ass.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161563)

This is just a gangbang with three gingers while a fourth ginger watches from outside taking notes and photographs.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161569)

You put as many fingers in your partner's ass as you can before they start to bleed. You then record that number on their back with their own poo.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161578)

underrated

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163330)

This is simply slang for an asian guy banging a white girl.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161581)

You watch your wife get fucked by another man and when he finishes you shoot up with testosterone, blow a line of coke and jerk off on her face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161589)

This is simply cyber sex over IRC but it utilizes USB dildos and fleshlights with feedback systems: the fleshlight heats, lubes and constricts according to the sensors on the remote dildo, and likewise the remote dildo pounds away depending on how you fuck the fleshlight.

It's really fucking pathetic shit and I don't know why you even wanted to know about it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161593)

This is the name for manrape in which a seemingly powerful man is held down and assfucked to completion by a True Alpha Bro. It happens in jail showers on the reg.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161595)

This isn't an actual sex act but rather is the nickname for the ass shape that is imprinted on the sheets or carseat or whatever after unprotected fucking. It's a combination of sweat, vaginal secretion, cum and poop.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161598)

Mutual masturbation between Downs teenagers.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161606)

You sit on a chair stroking your pathetic pissworm while Darnel, Tyrone and Malcom run train on your GF. The key here is the humiliation and cuckolding, a form of sexual role playing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161618)

A niche masturbation fetish where you jerk off to the nightly news and cum just as they cut to an interview with an illiterate old black lady.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161630)

Go to your bank and pick the sexiest teller there, write your phone number on her arm with a sharpie, violently rip her clothes off and fuck her however you want as hard as you want while she inhales nitrous. You finish up by sticking her head in an oven and fucking her from behind.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161676)

There's this epidemic right now in the gay clubs where you stick your dick in a gloryhole and some asshole stabs you with a needle and steals blood. It's pretty fucking troublesom.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24161677)

This one isn't for the faint of heart. Line up 6-8 menstruating girls on the edge of your bed, bent over and naked. One by one you insert your penis in them, pull out and use the mess to 'finger paint' a portrait of Obama on your pillow case.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162400)

You play slap bass guitar with your hardon while a WOC tickles your nuts with her afro and rims your angus.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162428)

A clever misnomer, this is actually no-handed masturbation. It takes years to master and practitioners report feeling sensations akin to the "invisible hand of economics" stroking their bulging rod.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162453)

First you fuck a Thai girl, the more petite the better. I understand that it's legal to fuck 12 year olds over there. When you reach climax you pull out and unload on her abdomen and chest. Immediately you bear hug her and hold her close for about 30 minutes until the cum dries. Then you get up and walk around with her stuck to you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162471)

do PauliePorsche too

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162460)

Eat nothing but curry for a couple of weeks until your body is saturated. Then you fuck the hairiest girl you find. Just as you creampie her, shart and then run your finger through your crack and draw a mustache over her mustache. It's a lot like a Dirty Sanchez except it's hairier and more spicy.

The "PauliePorsche":

Jerk off while looking at yourself in the mirror and taking computer support calls from the US.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162493)

This one is hard to pull off. You get two objective 10s to get each other off while you watch, sipping scotch, doing top-notch blow and smoking hand-rolled tobacco from Nepal. When they invite you to join in you politely decline.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162530)

Have you ever heard of a hat trick in hockey? This is similar: you fuck three MILFs in 2.5 hours.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162549)

This act requires some decent balance and coordination. It can be performed with any mix of men or women wearing strapons. It's nothing more than a double-reverse cowgirl, so the first person sits up in bed, the next one sits on their cock in a reverse cowgirl and the last person sits on the second person's cock in reverse cowgirl.

If the middle participant is a male, the other two participants can race to see who makes him cum first (via prostate stimulation or traditional dick friction.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162720)

This one is fun to pull on girls from broken families. While she's sucking your dick you smack her face fairly hard (be sure not to do it too hard or she may clench) and then reach over and smack her mom's ass really hard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162919)

This isn't really a sex act per se but more of a technique. When you take the panties off a girl and she has zero pussy etiquette (i.e. 1970's bush), after the initial shock you hands together in front of you, palms away and pointer fingers touching. Place them on her crotch and gently push down and away parting the gnarled, wet mess. Do this until you have unobstructed access to the slippery pink treasure below.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162928)

Get your Asian chick naked and ready to fuck. She holds your dick with a set of chopsticks while you pour low-sodium soy sauce on her ass and pussy. Eat a slice of pickled ginger, take a lick of her seafood then wash it down with cold sake.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163323)

Start with a bourbon-soaked Cuban cigar, gently insert it into your GF's moist fuck hole. When you are done fucking her with it cum on her. Finally, ask your wife to light the cigar for you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162962)

You have to time this one just right. Find a trauma victim. Wait until they're about to lose consciousness and then fuck them in the ass. Keep fucking them until they die. Supposedly the moment their spirit leaves the body you'll cum stupid hard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162976)

This is when she sucks your UGGGGHHHHHH, then you fuck her UGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH and she licks your UGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24162983)

An objective 10 rides you while you are high on coke, sipping on Dom and playing Russian Roulette with the Swedish Bikini Team. FYI the gun is actually a squirt gun filled with your previous load mixed with expensive chardonnay...the girls always giggle when they get it in the face but do you really want your own cum in your eye?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163006)

This is the finishing move of a stubborn girl who wants it all. She sucks your dick and eventually you cum, and she moans while you are coating her throat. Then she pulls the "Montana Management CO" by placing her fingers at the base of your cock, squeezing and moving her hand up to the tip to get every last bit out (sort of like toothpaste.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163028)

Well, considering you have no sex organs this is a pointless exercise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163031)

Please be patient.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163056)

Fuck your girlfriend from behind as hard as you can, then creampie her and scream "GIVE ME SOME SUGAR, BABY." Then give her several more hard pumps to froth up the stew in her love canal. Pull your dick out, wipe the foam off it and smear it on her face while saying "YOU GOT REAAAAAAL UGLY."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163342)

ty i'll try this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163345)

This one takes discipline. When you go to bed you start rubbing your cock and keeping it rock hard but you cannot let yourself cum. When your mother comes in to check on you you must pretend you are asleep but really you make yourself cum just as she kisses your forehead. If she realizes your are awake you have actually performed "The Doobs."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163354)

This is totally heterosexual sucking and fucking between several very alpha bros in the sauna wearing sandals.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163363)

Start by taking a bodyshot of tequila and tobasco off the belly of a beaner. Then start to fuck while humming the Mexican Hat Dance song. Next drizzle some lube onto her back and scream "WETBACK", then yell at her to get to work picking the used condom wrappers off the floor, then cum in her mouth and ask her if she wants more orchata.

I don't expect you to be able to get all the way to the end without her getting pissed and leaving. The point is seeing how far you can go with it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24163381)

There is a special Chinese version of the fleshlight that is a tighter fit but, more importantly, goes "East to West." This is a slang for a group of friends each buying one and seeing how many loads they can deposit in theirs in a 24-hour period. Dick pills and cocaine are legitimate fuck aids.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185436)

Head down to a local flop house where the junkies and hookers hang out on the black side of town. Cover your eyes with something like a bandana and then start sticking your dick in whatever wet holes you can find. When you cum pay whomever is attached to that hole with a new Bic lighter, a spoon and a pack of clean syringes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185438)

Never heard of this one, but it sounds kinda like the "Hot Carl Spackler" where you are fucking a girl, you take a dump on her chest and then you take your shoe and "step in it." Make sure to track it around her apartment a bit before you leave.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185441)

This is for the dirty fuckers out there. You meet a girl at Oktoberfest and feed her some kielbasa and lots of sauerkraut. Wash it down with a nice, rich wheat beer. When the inevitable occurs you follow her into the porta-potty and have her suck you off while she's blowing pure, unadulterated evil out her starfish. It still smells better than kimchi.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185443)

For the ARE COUNTRY PUMO you substitute "GF" with "sister."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185447)

This is slang for speed fucking. Get a stop watch and start it, then go on OKCupid and troll for fat girls. Don't stop the timer until you've actually inserted your penis into her chubby slit. Whatever that number is becomes your .com score. Depending on your locale you should be able to get in under 60 minutes or so.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2377422&forum_id=2#24185450)