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I cheated on my wife last night. One night stand very drunk.
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:55 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Been with her for 14 years and we have kids. First time I have ever done anything like this and definitely the last. Got blacked out and met a person at a bar when out with friends from out of town. I think I was probably roofied as I’ve drank that much before and never been close to that drunk. I love my wife so much, she is my soul mate and she told me that if I ever cheated on me she would leave me immediately.
What do I do? I am wracked with guilt and am disgusted by myself, but I don't think I can tell her. If she left me it would kill me and our kids. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:56 PM Author: hilarious institution gaming laptop Never speak or think of it again. I say this as one of those unicron like female posters. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143047) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:52 AM Author: kink-friendly gaping field (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146293) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:56 PM Author: Turquoise fantasy-prone spot jap The right thing is to deal with your guilt and keep it to yourself. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143053) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:39 AM Author: transparent pocket flask Been in this situation before. DO NOT SAY ANYTHING. Keep it till you die, bring it to your grave. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26144285) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:38 PM Author: vivacious cruise ship dysfunction You have to tell her. It is insane to try to keep something like this from her for the rest of her life.
Just come clean, and let the forgiveness flow. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:46 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed she will not forgive me. this will be a deal breaker. 75% chance she wants an immediate divorce with sole custody of the kids, relationship irrevocably broken. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146471) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:48 PM Author: vivacious cruise ship dysfunction Nah, people pretend to be much more hardline before-the-fact than when presented with real contrition.
Honestly, I could not deal with having this guilt forever. If it was me, in 40 years when I am slowly dying and she's taking care of me, I'd still be wrecked by guilt about living a lie all that time. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:54 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I believe her. At the very least I believe it would ruin our relationship.
I don't know if I can deal with it either. It might consume me. But it probably will even if I tell her.
It was just one night in 10+ years when I was as drunk as I've ever been and there is a really good chance I was roofied and basically raped. I'm not justifying it, but it was basically two hours out the tens of thousands I've been with her.
I am hoping I can get over it eventually and put it behind me and be a better husband going forward. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:08 PM Author: vivacious cruise ship dysfunction Like I said, if it was me, it would bother me forever. It would be some recurring bad memory that always came up and made me feel guilty and like a shitty person.
But that's me. If you can compartmentalize it, more power to you. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:12 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I can't compartmentalize. I will feel guilty forever and cringe at the thought. But I will do that whether I tell her or not. Getting it off my chest will hurt her terribly and I don't think it will help me at all. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146563) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:14 PM Author: vivacious cruise ship dysfunction Do you have a pre-nup, or would she get half of everything + child support + alimony?
If she finds out some other way, it's over, obviously. Like when the drunk girl sobers up and feel guilty... |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:16 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed half of everything, child support and alimony. when we got married we had nothing.
I pray for my wife's sanity that this woman doesn't do that. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 2:12 PM Author: pearl bossy laser beams I bet you'd be surprised how time scrubs guilt and what you can actually live with if you try (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146871) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:44 PM Author: Aphrodisiac sanctuary doctorate Whoa! Wrong! Do not do this!
You'll feel fine in a month. |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 12:36 PM Author: nudist parlour Go out this weekend and see if you can do it again. You'll forget all about the first one.. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26202513) |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 11:06 PM Author: vibrant chrome indirect expression This is actually CR. just bang other chicks when you're out of town. After a while it will seem normal. And you get strange. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26206731) |
Date: August 16th, 2014 9:56 PM Author: Filthy hairy legs resort Probably flame, but how did you abruptly break 10 years of resolve after a few drinks? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143050) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:57 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed this girl was throwing herself at me, and it wasn't a few, it was probably 20, and I swear I might have been roofies. I was basically blacked out. Don't remember much. I'm sick to my stomach. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143057) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:17 PM Author: frozen community account Flame jumped the shark here.
A married guy with kids is not getting it up after 20 drinks. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:25 AM Author: glittery federal stead headpube (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146196) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:05 PM Author: Adulterous principal's office says the not married guy without any kids
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:58 PM Author: hilarious institution gaming laptop Plus how many women with multiple children say they will "leave immediately" if their husband cheats on them? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143063) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:59 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed her mom and grandmother were cheated on. she has a particular problem with cheating. this is the stupidest thing I have ever done in my entire life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143068) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:04 PM Author: hilarious institution gaming laptop The fact that it happened to her mother and grandmother makes it more likely that she will be tolerant. You sound like a virgin. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143088) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:05 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed definitely the opposite. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143101) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:58 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel just let it be man
don't tell her, don't do anything different. you were basically just masturbating - drunk and needed to cum.
maybe quit the sauce/let her know you think you might have a problem with drinking but don't reference this episode.
obviously you fucked up badly and don't need to be reminded of how stupid you were
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:04 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed yeah, I think no matter what I am going to quit drinking. I can hardly eat though I just feel so sick about this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143094) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:08 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel ya dude, it's just not worth it.
I've done some stupid shit while drinking including having really unsafe sex while in a relationship. You basically can't drink with a group of people - you can drink alone in a cabin in the woods or something or with your wife, or in your mancave at the house - but not in a place that has pussy floating around.
You had over 10 drinks at least. At that point your higher cognitive functions are so thoroughly eroded that all you can think about is base animal shit which involves fucking to blow a load and get dat dopamine or whatever chemical it is.
Obviously you are feeling guilty and if she asks you - you need to be honest with her about part of the situation which is: you think you have a problem with alcohol and need help/need to stop for a bit.
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:10 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Thanks for the pep talk. I am just so sick about this.
BTW, I probably had 15+ drinks and think I was roofied. I haven't drank that much in years, but I was more out of it than even normal. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:20 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel your fine bro. you definitely are struggling with the fear right now.
hopefully you used a condom and didn't blast loads of baby batter in that puss
I think that this random slut would let it slide |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:23 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I don't know how I did, but I did.
One thing I didn't mention is that my wife is pregnant...we haven't had sex in months and probably won't until she has the baby. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:25 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel damn dude you wife does have a mouth
but J/K you are fine man just chill |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:27 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Thanks bro. Seriously, this has been really helpful. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143242) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:26 PM Author: Heady fortuitous meteor library wtf is this normal? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143236) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:26 PM Author: supple state So your boys were in town and asked to hang out. Your PREGNANT wife said "sure sweetie, have a great time!" You go out, get shit-faced, mindlessly thrust some chick while in a completely drunken fog and didn't use protection? You deserve to feel as bad as you do if not worse. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143241) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:27 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I used protection, but believe me, I know. I am terrible human and I hate myself. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143245) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:29 PM Author: supple state As a wife, I think I would ultimately rather not know at all, but you need to make sure you aren't suspicious AT ALL. Immediately deactivating FB or announcing an alcohol problem would probably be a flag. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143257) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:31 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Well, she knows that I was almost black out drunk last night, so that wouldn't be a shock.
I'm most concerned about this girl.
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:32 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel if your privacy settings/FB game is tight you have nothing to worry about from that angle but ya - no sudden movements for a bit.
OP has one trump card and that is that he has a problem with alcohol and is getting help for it. that is the ONLY thing |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:33 PM Author: supple state True. He doesn't even have to say he has a problem. Just say he's cutting way back and can't hold it the way he used to.
Also make sure to get DAT STD test |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:34 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed how long do I have to wait to get tested to be sure I didn't get anything? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143281) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:35 PM Author: supple state I don't know dude I'm not a skank like you. Call your friendly neighborhood clinic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143289) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:27 AM Author: glittery federal stead headpube (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146201) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:28 AM Author: glittery federal stead headpube If your penis starts tingling for no reason whatsoever, then that means the infection has set in already (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146206) |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 11:10 PM Author: vibrant chrome indirect expression Herpes takes a long time to show up on a test (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26206765) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:37 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Girl is a "friend of a friend" so she can figure it out (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143301) |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 11:09 PM Author: vibrant chrome indirect expression Gas urself (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26206757) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:27 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Lazy flame (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143244) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 9:58 PM Author: Godawful candlestick maker congrats
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:06 PM Author: Bearded Son Of Senegal Rehab Tell her. She'll be relieved, because she's been feeling guilty for a long time. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143106) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:07 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I am pretty confident she has never cheated on me. She is a really good person. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143112) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:13 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Nah she was just using Darnell as a human dildo, don't worry about it (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143141) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:12 PM Author: Filthy hairy legs resort tiNtcr (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143139) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:13 PM Author: Dashing indian lodge Take it to the grave. Did you wear a condom? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143146) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:14 PM Author: Beady-eyed quadroon public bath every marriage deserves a few indiscretions (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143150) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:14 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed BTW, do you think there is any real concern that this woman, whose name I didn't even remember, would tell my wife?
Before Facebook she literally wouldn't even have enough information about me to find me after the fact, but with Facebook that is no longer the case. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:15 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university 50/50 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143153) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:15 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed seriously? please don't fuck with me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143156) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:22 PM Author: Heady fortuitous meteor library deactivate FB now (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143208) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:25 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I put my account fully on private and made my marriage status unavailable except for friends. But I did that this afternoon. This girl could have woken up this morning and FB'd me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143228) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:25 PM Author: Heady fortuitous meteor library from my experience, girls have fucked up heads.... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143233) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:48 PM Author: wonderful school wow bro. sounds like you've had a crazy experience! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146724) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:00 AM Author: bateful cuckold uh you were probably good until you did this - your wife is going to realize you went private and changed the privacy settings on your marriage status. Which will lead her to wonder. . . (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146062) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:02 AM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed My wife is a friend, so unless she logs in on someone else's account, she won't have any idea. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146075) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:38 PM Author: bateful cuckold what if one of her friends, family members or co-workers looks you up and tells her what if she happens to be logged out of facebook what if she happens to see your privacy settings |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:44 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed she doesn't know what they are now, so she wouldn't know they have changed. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146468) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:54 PM Author: alcoholic charismatic temple azn Women are anything but rational about this sort of thing, so yes it is possible. More likely though is that she will squeal to her friends and it will get back to your wife through the grapevine. If that happens you can tell your wife that the other girl was drunk and tried to make a pass at you and is lying about having sex. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147389) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 4:50 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I'm not worried about squealing. My wife has no connection to these people at all, and mine is like three steps away at closest. I'm worried about someone proactively seeking my wife out to tell her. That is the only way she could find out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147648) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:17 PM Author: supple state The real question is can you trust that no one else will tell her? One of your bros (or bro's gf/wife)? The girl you slept with? Could someone have seen you?
Edit: Sorry didn't refresh soon enough before posting. In the digital age you definitely need to worry about this broad tracking you down or interfering. It's a definite gamble. If you tell her there's no telling how she'll react. If you don't tell her and she finds out from someone else you are FUCKED. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:18 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Friends were gone. that was why it happened. if they had been there I wouldn't have done it. No one would have seen me.
Only concern is the woman. But she has no motivation to do it, and I think might have roofied me, so maybe she’d be crazy to do that |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:19 PM Author: Cracking territorial dog poop chapel she's probably down then if she knew the deal - some girls get off on that in a twisted way. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143186) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:19 PM Author: supple state See edit above. The takeaway:
If you tell her now there's no telling how she'll react. If you don't tell her and she finds out from someone else you are FUCKED. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:21 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I know how she'll react. She'll want an immediate divorce.
I think I have to just risk it and hope this woman isn't in to ruining marriages. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:24 AM Author: smoky adventurous dilemma What friends all abandon a buddy who is blackout drunk at a bar? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146192) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:28 AM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed They were probably just as drunk, maybe more.
I was like 10 minutes from my house. They probably assumed I was just going to go home. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:20 PM Author: Dashing indian lodge "It wasn't me." - Shaggy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143196) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:25 PM Author: Seedy Friendly Grandma Philosopher-king Gee, a mysterious new poster shares a flamey as fuck story. Shocking. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143229) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:26 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I'm not a new poster, just using a new name. Believe me, I wish this were flame. I've never felt so bad in my entire life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143235) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:34 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Why using a new name? Xo is sympathetic to cheats. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143280) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:34 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Because of the .001% chance that someone knows who I am on this board. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143284) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:43 PM Author: Seedy Friendly Grandma Philosopher-king Bro, this is ridiculous flame. Fuck off. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143333) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:41 AM Author: opaque property pervert (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143984) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:27 PM Author: iridescent boyish church building scourge upon the earth Personally, if it really was a one-time drunk mistake that my wife deeply regrets and will never let happen again, I'd prefer that she not tell me and that I never find out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143246) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:36 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle Garrison Cuckoldry Ditto though with the genders reversed of course. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143300) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:52 PM Author: wonderful school "genders reversed of course."
lol i was gonna say!! |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:29 PM Author: Yellow aromatic shrine voyeur i'd tend to agree with the crowd here about keeping it quiet, especially because you'd be FUCKED in a divorce but your dumb ass didn't use a condom so I lean towards telling her. If you give your wife the herp you caught from this drunk bar whore, how's that gonna make you feel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143252) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:30 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Condoms don't protect from herpes, that's flame, too (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143261) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:29 PM Author: Cobalt Soul-stirring Ticket Booth Never mention it and never let the girl contact you again. Your kids will be better off in a 2 parent household rather than being shuffled back and forth between houses. It's a one time mistake. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143255) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:32 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed thank you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143275) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:31 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Will you do it again? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143265) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:32 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed never ever ever. God I wish I could take it back. I feel like I was roofied because I barely remember it and had little control. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143270) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:36 PM Author: vermilion massive house old irish cottage TERRIBLE FLAME (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143295) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:38 PM Author: Demanding really tough guy university Lazy as shit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143309) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:41 AM Author: opaque property pervert (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143988) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:36 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle Garrison Cuckoldry If this is truly a one off drunken hookup that you intensely regret and don't intend to repeat then I would say take it to your grave.
If you were my husband then I as the wife really would rather not know.
PS: obviously you have to go and be tested for STDs. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:37 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed It 100% is. This is the worst feeling i have ever had in my entire life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143302) |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:38 PM Author: diverse center this.
assuming the other woman isnt going to tell the wife, you are better off not telling her.
and yes, get fucking tested for stds. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:42 PM Author: Galvanic cocky feces nibblets One of the main risks at this point is that your behaviors resulting from this stupid act will make your wife suspicious. You seem like you won't be able to just man up and take this one to the grave.
Additionally, it seems that many people in real, long term relationships view one time mistakes like this as expected. Obviously your betrayal (and irresponsibility within that betrayal) would be harmful and fucking heartbreaking if your pregnant wife found out, but can you handle the secret?
The secret is what kills people on the inside and can lead to secondary deterioration.
I also think that "I will leave you immediately" is a tactic that may not play out as you've been led to believe. But if this isn't symptomatic and really won't be repeated, don't ruin your family.
Other posters are right in this thread about your drinking. Put a cap on it and do some hardcore introspection. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:44 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed thanks.
Yes, the secret is killing me, but I definitely don't think I'll feel any better if I tell her. |
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Date: August 16th, 2014 10:51 PM Author: deep stimulating nursing home wgwag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26143365) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:56 AM Author: know-it-all abnormal gas station i've thought this back and forward and i think you gotta tell her man
you fucked up bad. i see people's point about taking it to your grave if you truly will never do this again, but i think you have to treat her like an adult and let her make that decision
if you do tell her, i would be ready to lay out a plan on what you intend to do to change your behavior in the future. i would just also tell her (not begging, but like a man) that you love her, will never hurt her again, and don't want her to leave but that you'll respect her decision
anything that can be destroyed by the truth should be |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:10 AM Author: Godawful candlestick maker lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26144133) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:39 AM Author: coral mental disorder lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26144289) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:54 PM Author: wonderful school lol? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146762) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:45 PM Author: Aphrodisiac sanctuary doctorate lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147324) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 5:41 PM Author: Disturbing pontificating parlor lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26148032) |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 6:48 AM Author: slate bat-shit-crazy stag film Rofl (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26201427) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:01 AM Author: coral mental disorder you shouldn't do it again (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26144092) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 10:50 AM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Not that I don't deserve it, but last night was the worst night of sleep I've ever had in my entire life. I'm a mess.
And what makes me feel even more guilty is that my wife feels bad for my because I was so hung over yesterday. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:10 AM Author: Pungent base Lazy flame, but tell her obv. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146116) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:16 AM Author: Comical judgmental sex offender locale we can't give you a good answer without knowing more details about the girl and the sex (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146150) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:51 AM Author: Unholy histrionic hell nowag If my wife were home pregnant and I hadn't had sex in months I'd be disappointed if I went out with my buddies and DIDN'T get laid. Stop being a wuss. We're men. It's what we do. There's a 50% chance she's had someone else's cock while married to you, so call it even and move on. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146290) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 11:55 AM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Thanks...although I'm 99% sure she hasn't cheated on me.
And, just to clarify, it isn't what I have ever done in my entire relationship, so it isn't really what we do. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:36 PM Author: Unholy histrionic hell nowag "...although I'm 99% sure she hasn't cheated on me."
Do you know how many men have to be talked down from ledges and bridges every day because they think this way? |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:47 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed yeah, but justifying my actions based on a small chance she has done it also is just not right (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146474) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:58 PM Author: impressive olive affirmative action range I'm not sure you should tell her. If the guilt is too much, I have a strategy on how you should approach it.
Offer to let her fuck another guy.
If she does, your guilt will be gone. It may even release some hidden desires and push your marraige to new heights. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:59 PM Author: crimson hospital (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146510) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 12:59 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed One thing I do know is that this will not work (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146513) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 1:02 PM Author: impressive olive affirmative action range I thought the same thing too, when I was in your shoes.
Just try it.
You are just giving her and option. It worked for me and turned out to be amazing. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 2:00 PM Author: Big lay ITT: Flame fighting flame (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146805) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 2:23 PM Author: impressive olive affirmative action range Just trying to spread the gospel, friend.
What makes you think I'm flame?
I came to this board from a google search of "ladyboys and cuckoldry". Perhaps unsurprisingly, xoxohth has the top two results. http://www.google.com/search?q="ladyboys+and+cuckoldry" |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 2:03 PM Author: vivacious cruise ship dysfunction Why not offer a threesome with the same chick?
When she inevitably accepts, it will be much less serious that he's fucked her other times as well. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 6:09 PM Author: Adulterous principal's office best advice of thread (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26148230) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:56 PM Author: Amber Internal Respiration Twinkling Uncleanness Have an MFM threesome. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147400) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 2:12 PM Author: Mahogany stage what's his name? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26146872) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:12 PM Author: Brilliant black woman juggernaut describe the secks and the chick (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147184) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:17 PM Author: Thriller piazza mood Not your fault bro Sounds like you were raped |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 6:04 PM Author: Painfully Honest Razzmatazz Heaven (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26148200) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 3:41 PM Author: Rusted talented menage If not flame you're fucked. If you were going to get away with this you wouldn't have even posted about it and wouldn't be changing any behaviors at all. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147291) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 4:51 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed Why? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147653) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 5:59 PM Author: Rusted talented menage Because that's the kind of stone-cold psychopathic response to a situation like this that you need in order to control it. You're dumb to post here in case someone can figure out it's you and even dumber to change your FB settings and talk about rehab the weekend after it happened. Also, you feel guilty about it, which is going to cloud your judgment, and probably already has. When shit like this happens you need to contain it at all costs. Don't do anything unusual or even tell a bunch of strangers (you hope) on the internet. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26148167) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 7:05 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I'm not talking about rehab.
I'm not acting any different except for a little bit nicer possibly, but noticeably so.
I did change my FB settings, but there is no way my wife will know I did that. It is only a setting for people who don't know me.
I'm not telling anyone at all except you all...which I need to do or I'm going to go insane. |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 4:31 PM Author: Pearly Theater What time did you get in from plowing that new poon (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26147536) |
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Date: August 17th, 2014 5:50 PM Author: Motley autistic box office lol @ some of the dramatic libs itt (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26148082) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:32 AM Author: Cruel-hearted curious trust fund deer antler bra, there ain't nothing wrong with what you did. your wife probably think you gay for not cheating yet. she probably shocked it took you this long. don't worry about it bra. if anything you should do this sort of thing more often. she'll respect you more bra. know what i'm saying? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26151630) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:14 PM Author: Concupiscible Red Theatre Weed Whacker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26153861) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:37 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I'm trying to pull myself together.
I will definitely never do this again. It makes me sick just thinking about it. God, I hope she doesn't find out. |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 2:30 PM Author: Concupiscible Red Theatre Weed Whacker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26154355) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 2:34 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed I'm trying (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26154384) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:29 PM Author: irradiated jet telephone national You need to get to CHURCH. That's the only place that will understand how fucked up your life has gotten.
I'm actually completely agnostic, but the secular world is not for you. |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:47 PM Author: haunting market ape dont tell her. living w/ guilt is punishment enough.
i wouldn't divorce husband over a one-night stand and i think i could even learn to trust him again, but i'd lose a lot of respect for him as a person for showing such poor judgment and you can never regain respect w/ a person once it's lost. |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 2:00 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed thank you. It is serious punishment. I'm so disgusted with myself. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26154211) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 1:57 PM Author: Cream space antidepressant drug Flame. No dood married for ten years would feel this guilty aboit this unless yougot caught. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26154196) |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 2:03 PM Author: lascivious lemon lettuce corn cake Protip: a woman will never forgive you for this. If you tell her, AT BEST, she will cheat on you back to get even and still treat you like shit forever. At worst, you are divorce-pwned.
Just keep it quiet and be a better husband, you idiot. |
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Date: August 18th, 2014 8:20 PM Author: Idiotic Kitchen Dragon The only fucked up thing I see is that you feel so guilty about this. Well, that and you didn't use a condom. Monogamy (or at least fucking only one person for most of your life) is not natural or realistic. You may as well feel guilty about the fact that your shit stinks. It's simply human nature and there is nothing you can do about it. Most dudes who have been married for that long would kill for that kind of opportunity. You should be patting yourself on the back not torturing yourself with guilt.
And for the love of god, don't say anything to her. That will just create a ton of drama at best (and ruin your marriage at worst). Getting strange on the side is harmless. Most men do it eventually and many do it all the time. In the very unlikely event that this girl tells your wife, just tell her that she's a crazy stalker who won't take no for an answer. Go completely overboard and threaten to get a restraining order if necessary. If there are no witnesses or other evidence of cheating, your wife will believe you over her.
So stop beating yourself up over it. At the bare minimum you should jack off to the memory, and I would seriously consider using her as a fuck buddy on the side if she is cool with that and won't tell the wife. There is no reason to feel guilty for being a human male with a normal sex drive. Accepting that this is the way you are will result in less guilt (and possibly more fun). Just make sure to use a condom next time (whether you do it with the same girl or someone different). |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 7:54 AM Author: Bearded excitant clown giraffe only cr answer. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26201574) |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 12:41 PM Author: Overrated gaped office yeah i don't get it.
if anything, the desire he feels for other women is the thing to feel bad about. and you can't do anything about that. the fact your privates touched another person's isn't a huge deal compared to the fact that you may not really like your wife as much as you think. |
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Date: August 25th, 2014 11:15 PM Author: Bespoke hairraiser dopamine orchestra pit (Guy who would flip out if a female poster said she cheated on her bf of three months) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26206803) |
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Date: August 19th, 2014 10:30 PM Author: fiercely-loyal boistinker half-breed omg I still feel so terrible. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2647464&forum_id=2#26165317) |