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New Secretary Is Too Hot
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Date: October 10th, 2015 9:59 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I always wanted a hot paralegal or secretary. I thought it would be great, but it's just torture.
She has a tight body, firm Cs, a ridiculous ass, and a beautiful face.
I just can't deal with it. I can't even fucking deal with it. Anytime she comes to my office to talk about an assignment my mind immediately goes off on an unprofessional frolic.
Late afternoon yesterday we were having an in-office happy hour and she sat next to me and just tried to engage me directly in a conversation about I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT and I don't fucking need this chick around me when there's any alcohol. I made up some bullshit excuse about having to get some documents out and went back to my office and then she comes by before she leaves to TELL ME SHE GOT THE EMAIL I SENT HER ABOUT AN ASSIGNMENT. Hey - you know how a normal person does that? By responding to the fucking email. I don't need you in my office when everyone else has left. Go away.
But she doesn't. She comes in and says she has questions about it - because a Friday night is totally when this fucking unimportant thing needs to be discussed. I tell her we can talk about it Monday morning and encourage her to go enjoy her Friday night and she smiles and giggles OH GOD WHY IS SHE GIGGLING and says she doesn't have any plans.
She starts asking questions about the assignment and I can't get the image of pulling her gorgeous hair as I fuck her over my desk out my head and she asks me a some fucking question and the answer is "six" but I say "sex" and she starts GIGGLING AGAIN AND BLUSHING OH GOD GET OUT OF MY OFFICE - "six, I meant six" and then she fucking smiles and says other things I don't hear because I am just completely lost in how beautiful she is. She eventually leaves.
I can't deal with this. I can't. I just can't. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:00 PM Author: salmon shitlib csb (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942952) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:00 PM Author: Green Vibrant Quadroon Psychic Cute flame (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942955) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:01 PM Author: splenetic sanctuary jfc go on (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942963) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 8:21 PM Author: trip ceo forum You like it when she GIGGLES? Seriously??
When I'm around a woman who giggles, I'm tempted to poke her eyes out with any available sharp object.
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 9:14 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Tell me more. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29024911) |
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Date: October 23rd, 2015 1:11 AM Author: idiotic lavender property athletic conference (sane, hinged bro) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29026564) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 9:59 PM Author: gold fortuitous meteor beep beep beep (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228034) |
Date: October 10th, 2015 10:00 PM Author: shimmering voyeur There is one like this at my office but thankfully she is on the other side of the office that I can go to because of SEC regs so I only see her the breakroom. I'd crawl over broken glass to fuck her. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942957) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:13 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol The worst part is she has a great personality, too. Like - she's not some dumb shit. She's intelligent and funny and it just fucking kills me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943033) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:26 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den (faggot into funny chicks) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943150) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:35 PM Author: Bateful lodge If she were smart she wouldn't be your secretary (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943627) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 12:08 AM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Paralegal. Went to good UG. Became paralegal to decide whether she wanted to go to law school. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943816) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 12:29 AM Author: Bateful lodge I'm always sad for people that do that. If they do the rational thing they have a shitty resume void. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943903) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:03 PM Author: Free-loading 180 Range I think you need to get her reassigned to someone else. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942983) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:05 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I can't - she's my team's paralegal and my team loves her (because she's great at her job). But the rest of my team are all females so none of them (I assume?) think about railing her every time she comes into their office. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942992) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:04 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I just realized I said "secretary" in the title - I have no idea why, she's a paralegal. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942985) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:05 PM Author: Green Vibrant Quadroon Psychic Because your flame is sloppy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28942995) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:08 PM Author: splenetic sanctuary stfu im enjoying this (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943009) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:12 PM Author: Sooty wonderful blood rage halford (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943021) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:07 PM Author: poppy soul-stirring theatre messiness (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023551) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:06 PM Author: dark flirting garrison why is this a problem? bend her over your desk (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943005) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:12 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I'm married and on track for partner. I don't need to be fucking my 26 y/o paralegal. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943022) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:12 PM Author: dark flirting garrison on the other hand, you only live once (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943027) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:19 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol It just can't happen. I can't risk my professional and personal life for that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943076) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:24 PM Author: black lascivious fanboi locale What kind of firm is this? If it's a <15 lawyer firm with male partners, they'll look the other way. You might get a lecture but you'll get some back-slapping too. Won't affect ability to make partner. If there are a lot of shrew lawyers there they'll ruin you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943126) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:27 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Yeeeeah, it's a biglaw firm and department head is a woman. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943159) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:29 PM Author: Spectacular mad-dog skullcap This is a test bro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943181) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:31 PM Author: Fluffy galvanic indian lodge dog poop LOL the paralegal is a plant!
Its an undercover commonsense/ethics test. This girl has probably nobreakfasted a dozen SAs so far. |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 6:02 AM Author: cerebral bright mediation jew Plausible (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28944475) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:53 PM Author: Jet Talking Gunner Parlour You also probably have absolutely no shot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983143) |
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Date: October 17th, 2015 12:10 PM Author: gaped deranged abode water buffalo This (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28985754) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:19 PM Author: black lascivious fanboi locale Better to get divorced before partnership than after. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943083) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:23 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol It makes me a little sick that I briefly thought, "Well that's a good point..." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943111) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:24 PM Author: Fluffy galvanic indian lodge dog poop So flirt with her and enjoy it at that level. Grownups can enjoy flirting without taking it to the actually having sex level. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943125) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:26 PM Author: bronze electric travel guidebook temple you don't understand the male mind. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943146) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:13 PM Author: Chest-beating Pale Crotch Wrinkle (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981315) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:09 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den are you flirting? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943013) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:14 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Yes.
I know I am.
I can't not do it. Uhg...I jokingly call her "Ms. [Last Name]" and she's started calling me "Mr." and I shouldn't engage in this but I can't help it. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:18 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den yeah dude i feel you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943071) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:19 PM Author: awkward chapel candlestick maker Why isn't she calling you Dr.? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943080) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:22 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Honestly, it's probably better that she calls my something other than my first name, because then I won't immediately imagine what she would sound like saying it through a moan. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943105) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:32 PM Author: awkward chapel candlestick maker Why wouldn't she moan "Dr." if she's having sex with you? That seems more likely than anything else. |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 2:37 PM Author: judgmental aromatic state your first name is "Dr."? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28946090) |
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Date: October 17th, 2015 12:24 PM Author: arousing blathering office generalized bond Yeah, but now you have to imagine saying/moaning: "Oh, Mr. ...,...,.,.,.,.,..,.,..,..,.,.,, what are you doing? Oh, Mr. ...,...,.,.,.,.,..,.,..,..,.,.,, you're so naughty" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28985853) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:09 PM Author: gay queen of the night no pics? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943014) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:17 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol That seems like a good way to out myself.
Post a pic, someone sticks it into TinEye - track down where she works, figure out the team she's most likely on and identify the only male associate in that team in the office. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:23 PM Author: Spectacular mad-dog skullcap Doobs screenshot ting this poast for later when inevitable pix are poasted... Lisping "thankth forth the informathion, gothsha" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943113) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:13 PM Author: mint contagious location fucking her just once is a good idea. you can make it happen. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943034) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:17 PM Author: dark flirting garrison (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943056) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:20 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I'm terrified I can and that's the worst part. I see the pathway to it, but I just can't go down that fucking path. I can't do it, and I need to keep her the fuck away from me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943088) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:25 PM Author: charcoal national security agency rigpig Why? Why are you so fucking uptight and self-serious? You're just another paper pushing loser lucky to finally catch a break in life (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943138) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:26 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den do it man. blow up your life for 5 minutes of pleasure then share the aftermath with us (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943145) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:30 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I bet she's a joy to fuck. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943191) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:33 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den probably, with that body and personality (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943224) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:27 PM Author: Spectacular mad-dog skullcap Boomer managing partner to op: It's inevitable bro... It has already happened......
Op looks around to see a wall array of lcd monitors with mirror images of op shouting "bullshit"
Boomer partner: "you are the 179th iteration of partner track senior associate" Screens simultaneously change to footage of secretary bent over desk. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:31 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol ...there is no spoon? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943201) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:40 PM Author: Spectacular mad-dog skullcap There are no ascii characters.... Only punctuation marks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943278) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:34 PM Author: poppy soul-stirring theatre messiness you are the same poster who ran the younger sister wants me flame. probably pensive. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023708) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:39 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol No, I'm not, and that's disgusting. Why the hell would someone's younger sister want them? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023744) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:27 PM Author: Fluffy galvanic indian lodge dog poop How would he ever be able to do it just once?
He either has to keep it at the flirt level or go all the way and risk being divorcepwned and nobreakfastpwned. There is no halfway house. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:37 PM Author: mint contagious location hehe i was trolling. it's a terrible idea.
the better idea is to find a way to jerk off at work. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:25 PM Author: Geriatric Irradiated Lettuce Stage I had a very obvious sexual tension with my work wife (flirted all the time, etc.). We were chatting on the firm messenger thing about how we'd been working a lot on an investigation and she said "yeah, hopefully this is the last of the crazy sex nights" (she meant 'sec', as we were working on an investigation), but it was a little awkward and kind of drove me nuts. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943140) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:32 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I thank god the paralegal isn't on the firm messenger. One of my greatest fears is at some point I'll see her pop on and get a message from her. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943213) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:41 PM Author: gay queen of the night how did you not say something like "yeah i'm getting tired of all the sex we're having too" or something like that (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943280) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:48 PM Author: Geriatric Irradiated Lettuce Stage It was only out there for like half a second before she was like "OMG SEC!!!!"
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:35 PM Author: razzle trust fund mexican It's kind of crazy how the male libido is always on, considering most people reproduce at most a few times during their life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943238) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:41 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol It's not like I want to fuck every women in my office - just this one.
And one of the new first years in my group. And one of the senior associates in corporate (but only because she seems really uptight). And two of the junior associates in the L&E group. And one junior associate in complex lit. Edit - also the dorky fucking bankruptcy associate that looks like Velma from Scooby Doo.
I think that's it. For my office.
If we expand it firm wide the list gets a lot longer.
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:43 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den in whatever room, or class, or organization, every guy has one chick among them he wants to fuck more than anyone else (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943306) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:49 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Oh god I would absolutely fuck the paralegal before any of the female associates. With them it's more of a - if the opportunity presented itself, sure, kinda thing.
With the paralegal if circumstances changed I would immediately do everything in my power to fuck her. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:36 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol My one comfort is she's really sweet and seems like a good person, and I can't imagine she would fuck a married guy. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943239) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:39 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den maybe she would if his wife wasn't satisfying him
you're making yourself hornier posting about this. repress it, pretend it doesn't happen. you need to have tunnel vision at the office. maybe you should try being cold to her |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:43 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol But she's so nice and that fucking smile - I can't be mean to her. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943303) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:41 PM Author: Fluffy galvanic indian lodge dog poop ha! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943284) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 7:13 AM Author: heady home giraffe Ljl at this Ljl at being on partner track at a biglaw firm Ljl at being worried about associate-paralegal relationships at a biglaw firm
You're married so you should know better but none of the reasons above should prevent this "relationship"
these things are no biggie. Except when it reaches married partner-summer associate level proportions - but then the summer is guaranteed steady employment for the SOL and the partner just has to go to "sensitivity" training. Lol. |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:41 PM Author: slap-happy drab box office gaping in on couchsurfer thread 2.0 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943286) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 6:21 AM Author: cerebral bright mediation jew (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28944488) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:49 PM Author: passionate milk So do you enjoy T&E/Private Client work? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943337) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 10:50 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol ...do I know you? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943348) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:12 PM Author: Avocado Flickering Hairy Legs Does she bring your coffee?
https://i.imgur.com/7GGX4u2.jpg
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:30 PM Author: mind-boggling faggotry Jfc (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943610) |
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Date: October 23rd, 2015 12:59 AM Author: apoplectic sound barrier fma (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29026510) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:13 PM Author: Avocado Flickering Hairy Legs I'll show the file I was talking about.
https://i.imgur.com/UtRRiup.jpg
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:29 PM Author: mind-boggling faggotry Ty (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943607) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 12:10 AM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol She actually did this to me. Dead fucking serious. After a few seconds I leapt out of my seat and just insisted she sit down. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943826) |
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Date: October 10th, 2015 11:19 PM Author: Avocado Flickering Hairy Legs https://i.imgur.com/dnaLwfu.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943549) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 12:17 AM Author: mint contagious location inappropriate office attire imo. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28943857) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 2:02 AM Author: Useless buff corner literal fgt (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28944097) |
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Date: October 24th, 2015 12:43 PM Author: Diverse Ape lol, it's LITERALLY one, maybe two, buttons away from being entirely appropriate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29034432) |
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Date: October 17th, 2015 12:12 PM Author: gaped deranged abode water buffalo JFc (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28985758) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:41 PM Author: poppy soul-stirring theatre messiness "needs implants" ironside (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023754) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 1:39 AM Author: razzle trust fund mexican The mass killer Breivik said that males are defective because of their biological needs. He probably copied that from somewhere else. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28944052) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 6:22 AM Author: cerebral bright mediation jew What was his moniker? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28944489) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 2:20 PM Author: turquoise university jerk off before work. no need to go in there with a loaded gun (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28946005) |
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Date: October 11th, 2015 9:56 PM Author: Cocky stead TTIWWOP. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28948750) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:40 PM Author: bipolar beady-eyed telephone filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983086) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 3:50 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I gave her the cold shoulder for most of the week and it was working, but then we had a call this afternoon and she caught me when I was with another attorney and said "Hey, I'll come to your office at [time] for [X] call." If I had responded with NO TAKE THE CALL FROM YOUR OFFICE I would have looked insane so I just nodded.
She came into my office and closed the door and immediately the room was filled with her sweet aroma. I was only marginally conscious for the call. Someone asked something about...I don't know...and then she was leaning over my desk completely and pointing at something on my screen and I could see directly down her blouse for what seemed like an eternity and then snapped my gaze up and then met her beautiful eyes OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD and I turned to the screen and just locked my eyes on it but her hair was gently wafting as she pointed from item to item on the screen...I have no idea what she was pointing at and then the call ended.
She sat back down and asked me what I was doing for the evening. I mumbled something semi coherent. She smiled warmly and said she had to do laundry, but the unit in her building was broken so she was going to have to do it at the laundromat. I suggested she might meet an interesting guy there, and she said she doubted it because only boring people like her do laundry on a Friday night. I told her I used to do laundry on Friday nights - she laughed, and then jokingly frowned and said, "Too bad you're taken."
My office smells so nice now. This is hell. |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:06 PM Author: cerebral bright mediation jew She knows EXACTLY what she is doing (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981270) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:12 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol but WHY?!
WHY is she doing it?!
There have got to be tons of successful good looking guys her age (or my age!) that are single that would go for her at the drop of a hat.
Leave me alone! |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:13 PM Author: Chest-beating Pale Crotch Wrinkle She's bored (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981313) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:22 PM Author: cowardly adventurous juggernaut den propinquity effect (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981368) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:23 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National The whore will try to ruin your life and blame you for it. Fuck some hot hookers before going to work and at lunch. That should help. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981374) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:37 PM Author: Pearly pocket flask going to need a not flame here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983063) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:40 PM Author: mint contagious location (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983084) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:46 PM Author: Fluffy galvanic indian lodge dog poop LOL she is so playing with you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983115) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:58 PM Author: Jet Talking Gunner Parlour lol so bro, flames over, this is written like an aspie nerds idea of what interactions are like (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983172) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:24 PM Author: Frozen antidepressant drug address This is going to end with you fucking her (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981377) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:25 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National and sued for sexual harassment, possibly rape (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981393) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:29 PM Author: Frozen antidepressant drug address I hooked up with a married woman at work once (pre lolskool) and when I broke it off she took a whole bottle of sleeping pills at her desk. Happy trails! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981418) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:32 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National except this one doing it for the money. plan A - marry future partner, plan B - sue the firm (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981435) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 5:30 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National Install cameras before your life is ruined. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28981428) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:29 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983004) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:55 PM Author: clear corn cake coldplay fan to begin with flame
but as an aside, this is a real problem in are country, I was lucky to get my hot secretary as a summer, but omfg bro, the secretary part probably gave her a small bump but I've literally only seen a handful of hotter girls irl, legit fucking 9 with just smoking fucking everything
I think she went back to the Bronx every night, she's an idiot if she isn't fucking/married to some dood in mfh by now |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:58 PM Author: Jet Talking Gunner Parlour (guy who never had a chance) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983184) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 10:00 PM Author: clear corn cake coldplay fan when the fuck did I say I did? As I said, I was a summer so I didn't even think about having a chance, so it wasn't torture. I should have fucked at least one other summer though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983201) |
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Date: October 16th, 2015 9:58 PM Author: Spectacular mad-dog skullcap so when are you going to post some kinda fucking pic (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28983178) |
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Date: October 17th, 2015 12:30 PM Author: arousing blathering office generalized bond (1) If this was a para in another department, and you only saw her in the lunch room and shit, I'd say bang her with reckless abandon. But never, ever, ever, bang someone who actually reports to you. That is just asking to get sexual harassment pwned.
(2) for some chicks, particularly some hot chicks, flirting is just how they interact with guys and doesn't necessarily mean anything. Don't mis-read her intentions. |
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Date: October 18th, 2015 1:36 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Yeah, you're absolutely right on both points.
On (2), it's further complicated by the fact that the only other male associate on our team is some nebbish junior associate that is 130lb and maybe 5'10 that startles at the sound of his own name, so I don't really have any frame through which to see how she interacts with other males. |
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Date: October 18th, 2015 1:41 PM Author: Mahogany associate i thought hiring partners filter out the nebs during recruiting (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#28992924) |
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Date: October 18th, 2015 2:19 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol My group's chair for our office is female and most of the partners/senior associates that still get involved in recruiting are also female. He's a sweet guy and did very well at a top school. Those are the main reasons he was hired.
He does great research and works quite hard, you just can't let him talk to clients because he starts stuttering and panicking. |
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Date: October 23rd, 2015 1:02 AM Author: apoplectic sound barrier what's his moniker? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29026527) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2015 12:50 AM Author: vivacious legal warrant law firms filter *out* nebbishes? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228676) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2015 1:12 AM Author: razzle trust fund mexican Likely depends on the firm, and maybe the region of the country. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228752) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 5:58 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol This afternoon she came by my office to apologize for not having finished an assignment she said she would get done by this morning.
She said she would get it done tonight while having a glass of wine.
I told her that was unnecessary, and that it could wait until tomorrow.
She responded with, "Oh, no. I really want to mark you off my to do list - and even better if I can do it on my couch after some wine."
Are you fucking serious? |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:01 PM Author: coiffed chartreuse theater unnngghhhhh (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023537) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:05 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol I'm pretty sure she's just trolling the shit out of me now. There is no context a response like that is acceptable. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I can't even engage in that kind of banter. I just have to immediately escape the situation before I get the firm sued and get divorce pwned. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023543) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:06 PM Author: Bateful lodge Pics or it didn't happen. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023549) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:05 PM Author: Mahogany associate you're taking big risks with your flame. tone it down a tad. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023545) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:09 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Yeah - I was tempted to not even post this incident because it's so fucking blatant and absurd. But whatever, it just fucking happened. I hope she's on the train home reading this thread on her phone right now giggling about what an idiot I am. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023555) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:18 PM Author: Frozen antidepressant drug address If not flame, and you are, you should just nail her. Fuck it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023588) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 6:29 PM Author: Cobalt Therapy National sue your firm for sexual harassment (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29023673) |
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Date: October 22nd, 2015 11:33 PM Author: Excitant dilemma dopamine You needed to bend her over your desk yesterday. YOLO. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29025943) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:17 PM Author: bipolar beady-eyed telephone filthpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228139) |
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Date: October 23rd, 2015 12:51 AM Author: Fragrant thirsty personal credit line degenerate 1. Women who interact with all men by flirting aren't nice, they're manipulative
2. She is only working as a paralegal to see if she wants to go to law school but is 26 years old? She's just a paralegal. |
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Date: October 24th, 2015 3:59 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol She's taking the LSAT in December. I hope she doesn't go to law school. That will be so sad. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29035428) |
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Date: October 24th, 2015 12:38 PM Author: Avocado Flickering Hairy Legs https://i.imgur.com/h5Cn3L8.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29034401) |
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Date: October 24th, 2015 5:24 PM Author: glittery stage JFC (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29035778) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 9:37 PM Author: brilliant floppy house goddamn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29227943) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:17 PM Author: bipolar beady-eyed telephone filthpig oh my (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228133) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 9:34 PM Author: startling autistic trump supporter pistol Things had been going alright the last few weeks. I'd started giving assignments to a group paralegal in another office.
But last night we had a group happy hour to celebrate an associate making partner. Late in the afternoon She stopped by my office and asked if I was going to go. Of course I was going, but I shrugged nonchalantly and motioned to my screens and said I had a lot to finish up, but maybe. She smiled warmly and said, if I did go, to swing by before I left so we could walk over together.
One of the senior associates stopped by my office and was rounding up people to leave. As we were waiting at the elevators someone asked, "Is [paralegal] coming? Should we wait for her?" A round of shrugs, and then the elevator arrived and we all piled in.
We had a couple large tables reserved for us at the bar, and not everyone had left with us, so one seat next to my right was open. She arrived about 15 minutes after us.
I felt like an asshole having not grabbed Her when we were leaving, but it had to be that way. I'm not sure what I expected...I think if someone had done that to me I would probably be hurt or angry?
She smiled at me, Her eyes sparkling, and without hesitation took the seat next to me. She squeezed my arm with Her soft petite hand - the skin on skin contact perfectly jolting - and said, teasingly, "You forgot to come get me! I guess that's what I get for bothering you while you're deep in thought!" I nodded, bemused, and apologized. She released Her grip from my arm, Her fingers tracing my forearm as She pulled away, and looked sternly at me. "I guess you'll just have to buy me a drink to make up for it!"
[I will finish later. I've got to go now - taking wife out to dinner apologize for getting home so late last night.]
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Date: November 21st, 2015 9:43 PM Author: Blue Hairraiser Whorehouse Do it bro, you cant pass up on this. Yolo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29227979) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 9:57 PM Author: territorial violet jap son of senegal she has to know most breakups occur over the holidays. she's giving you a lot to think about at the exact right time. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228026) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:02 PM Author: Wild aphrodisiac macaca Wow this reads just like a flame I mean a novel I mean a totally true story. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228050) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:08 PM Author: Ebony sickened haunted graveyard doctorate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228090) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:47 PM Author: razzle trust fund mexican Yeah if you're going to make up a story at least make it sound believable so we can enjoy it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228241) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:50 PM Author: razzle trust fund mexican It's like those "consumer reviews" online that are clearly promotional and written by some hack with a vested interest. They have no idea how to sound like a normal person. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228248) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 10:48 PM Author: nubile supple philosopher-king interesting that u capitalize "Her" and "She" but leave "wife" lowercase . . . (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228243) |
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Date: November 21st, 2015 11:48 PM Author: spruce bawdyhouse Cogent analysis. . . (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#29228484) |
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Date: July 24th, 2018 1:04 PM Author: Obsidian marvelous factory reset button (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#36487411) |
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Date: July 24th, 2018 1:06 PM Author: buck-toothed fat ankles alpha This is why men and women should not be together in the workplace. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3013923&forum_id=2#36487418) |