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"teach me to pitch", said the Kodiak bear to Livan Hernandez

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lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
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Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
...
Territorial University
  04/10/16
...
Flatulent pearly principal's office
  04/10/16
six months later: 1,500 pound Kodiak bear takes the mound...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
Teaching bears *anything* is dangerous. They're to be ident...
Flatulent pearly principal's office
  04/10/16
...
cruel-hearted frisky crotch
  04/10/16
...
Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
Pitch 3 is a slow, big curveball. Paul Goldschmitt looks eag...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
xo kodiak bear
Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
he's down to Earth enough that he is willing to pose for pic...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
rate this MLB player who broke the bear bearrier to integrat...
Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
...
galvanic violent indirect expression death wish
  05/19/17
180
Fragrant legal warrant
  05/19/17
...
galvanic violent indirect expression death wish
  12/22/20
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Indigo dilemma french chef
  12/22/20
...
Territorial University
  04/10/16
...
swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap
  04/10/16
...
federal shimmering personal credit line
  04/10/16
...
Pungent medicated area
  01/19/18
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Pungent medicated area
  04/23/18
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Pungent medicated area
  08/29/18
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swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap
  04/10/16
...
Pungent medicated area
  01/19/18
...
Misunderstood Marketing Idea
  04/10/16
*nabs Mike Trout and Tim Salmon in his mouth and viciously t...
federal shimmering personal credit line
  04/10/16
...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
...
Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
...
aphrodisiac kitty public bath
  04/10/16
...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
...
cruel-hearted frisky crotch
  04/10/16
...
Fragrant legal warrant
  05/19/17
...
galvanic violent indirect expression death wish
  05/19/17
lmfao
Aqua naked fortuitous meteor
  01/19/18
...
Indigo dilemma french chef
  12/22/20
...
Charismatic theater black woman
  04/10/16
Asked about his new relief pitcher after the game, Rockies m...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
...
Embarrassed to the bone address puppy
  04/10/16
...
swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap
  04/10/16
...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
Baseball's been bear-y bear-y good to me. - Bear Chico Es...
Splenetic stag film gaming laptop
  04/10/16
...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/10/16
...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/11/16
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lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/24/16
In a late season game, the bear is brought in to face Yasiel...
lime angry garrison pisswyrm
  04/24/16
...
Fragrant legal warrant
  05/19/17
...
hairraiser temple
  05/19/17
...
floppy gay famous landscape painting
  10/07/17
...
big-titted whorehouse
  01/19/18
...
Zippy adulterous mad cow disease
  01/19/18
one of the best threads i've ever seen on xo
Pungent medicated area
  01/22/18
...
balding talented therapy
  01/22/18
...
pale bateful clown
  01/22/18
...
floppy gay famous landscape painting
  04/09/18
...
Pungent medicated area
  08/29/18
...
Dashing Azure Idiot
  12/11/19
...
Indigo dilemma french chef
  08/02/21


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:23 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242089)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:23 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242094)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:23 PM
Author: Territorial University



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242096)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:24 PM
Author: Flatulent pearly principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242098)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:34 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm

six months later:

1,500 pound Kodiak bear takes the mound for the Colorado Rockies against the Diamondbacks. Paul Goldschmitt takes an 88 mph fastball right down the middle for Strike 1. The game pauses briefly as the umpire throws the ball to the Rockies dugout, so it can be given to the bear later as a souvenir, his first MLB pitch.

Paul Goldschmitt steps out of the batter's box, takes a few practice hacks. He steps back in. The bear kicks, deals...Goldschmitt swings and misses big on a 60 mph changeup.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242192)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:38 PM
Author: Flatulent pearly principal's office

Teaching bears *anything* is dangerous. They're to be identified, isolated, and exterminated. *Teaching* them is giving them the tools for our own destruction. Remember how the Battle of the Yukon started.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242218)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 5:50 PM
Author: cruel-hearted frisky crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30243130)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:38 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242223)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:48 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm

Pitch 3 is a slow, big curveball. Paul Goldschmitt looks eager to swing at it, but all he can do is ground it softly to pitcher.

The Kodiak bear picks up the ball with his mouth, then flings it to first with one flick of his massive, muscular head. The first baseman catches a slobbery baseball for the out.

The bear stays on the mound and roars. He's gotten his man out.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242298)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:50 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy

xo kodiak bear

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242314)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:52 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm

he's down to Earth enough that he is willing to pose for pictures with fans

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/c0/ca/d4/c0cad4bba21979c604c93784b2127dae.jpg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242350)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:54 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy

rate this MLB player who broke the bear bearrier to integrate baseball. what a hero

http://i.imgur.com/K7hcevV.jpg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242362)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:07 AM
Author: galvanic violent indirect expression death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343419)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:07 AM
Author: Fragrant legal warrant

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343421)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2020 10:38 AM
Author: galvanic violent indirect expression death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#41596295)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2020 10:39 AM
Author: Indigo dilemma french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#41596305)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:53 PM
Author: Territorial University



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242357)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:53 PM
Author: swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242360)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:05 PM
Author: federal shimmering personal credit line



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242472)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 19th, 2018 10:35 AM
Author: Pungent medicated area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35188534)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 23rd, 2018 10:14 AM
Author: Pungent medicated area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35899336)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 29th, 2018 11:06 AM
Author: Pungent medicated area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#36707896)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:53 PM
Author: swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242356)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 19th, 2018 10:34 AM
Author: Pungent medicated area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35188531)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 3:54 PM
Author: Misunderstood Marketing Idea



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242364)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:05 PM
Author: federal shimmering personal credit line

*nabs Mike Trout and Tim Salmon in his mouth and viciously tears them apart as they flap their slimy piscine bodies around the bases*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242465)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:05 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242471)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:06 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242479)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:15 PM
Author: aphrodisiac kitty public bath



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242525)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:23 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242561)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 5:51 PM
Author: cruel-hearted frisky crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30243138)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:08 AM
Author: Fragrant legal warrant



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343422)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:09 AM
Author: galvanic violent indirect expression death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343436)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 19th, 2018 11:00 AM
Author: Aqua naked fortuitous meteor

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35188672)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2020 10:37 AM
Author: Indigo dilemma french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#41596283)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:25 PM
Author: Charismatic theater black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242569)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:43 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm

Asked about his new relief pitcher after the game, Rockies manager Walt Weiss said "What I like best about Bearsie is that he goes right after batters. He doesn't get spooked. Some of these bears, they lose interest in pitching to you if you play dead or spray them with pepper. Not Bearsie - he just keeps throwing strikes."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242658)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 4:43 PM
Author: Embarrassed to the bone address puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30242661)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 5:50 PM
Author: swashbuckling yellow mad-dog skullcap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30243125)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 5:44 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30243089)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 5:52 PM
Author: Splenetic stag film gaming laptop

Baseball's been bear-y bear-y good to me.

- Bear Chico Escuela

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30243148)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 10th, 2016 8:30 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30244482)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2016 11:05 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30253214)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2016 10:16 AM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30336249)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2016 1:31 PM
Author: lime angry garrison pisswyrm

In a late season game, the bear is brought in to face Yasiel Puig at Chavez Ravine.

Pitch one is a lazy, 80-mph fastball right down the middle. Puig was taking all the way - he hears groans from his dugout and from some fans about why he didn't swing at such an easy pitch.

Pitch two is the exact same fastball, except this time Yasiel saw it coming. He swings and hits it a mile down the right field line, just barely foul: he misses a home run by inches.

Having read the scouting report and the Wikipedia article on Livan Hernandez, Yasiel is expecting the bear to throw him the same pitch on 0-2. He swings...and misses on a 60 mph eephus pitch.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#30336961)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:08 AM
Author: Fragrant legal warrant



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343427)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 19th, 2017 11:05 AM
Author: hairraiser temple



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#33343400)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2017 10:24 PM
Author: floppy gay famous landscape painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#34390907)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 19th, 2018 10:31 AM
Author: big-titted whorehouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35188520)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 19th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: Zippy adulterous mad cow disease



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35189035)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 22nd, 2018 11:10 AM
Author: Pungent medicated area

one of the best threads i've ever seen on xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35209019)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 22nd, 2018 11:17 AM
Author: balding talented therapy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35209075)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 22nd, 2018 11:21 AM
Author: pale bateful clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35209091)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 9th, 2018 10:14 PM
Author: floppy gay famous landscape painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#35803240)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 29th, 2018 2:49 PM
Author: Pungent medicated area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#36709791)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 11th, 2019 3:34 PM
Author: Dashing Azure Idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#39249503)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 2nd, 2021 9:21 PM
Author: Indigo dilemma french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3191233&forum_id=2#42886664)