I thought I met my soulmate, but then I learned about her Eat-Pray-Love past.
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: May 29th, 2017 12:10 AM Author: Bright hairraiser location police squad
I used to have (non-paid) casual sex frequently. I had a near death experience, became religious, and changed my views on most major topics. I was convinced recently that I had met my soulmate. Talking to her was like looking in to the mirror. I never felt the way I did when I first met her or anytime talking to her. I was immediately convinced she was the one, and I told my family and friends as much.
A tall, blonde, skinny WASP from New England and New York City, she was deeply intelligent, mannered and nuanced. She graduated from a T-30 with a philosophy major a couple years back. She did not have much of a career, but that was to my liking. Her father had attended a rival college to my own, both being Ivy League. I imagine our parents would have been mutually proud. As an adolescent, I had imagined her exact form and nature countless times with each throw of a coin in to wishing wells. They were always the same three yearnings: college, job and wife. I now have the first two, and I thought I just might have found the third. As an adolescent, I witnessed her closest analogue, my high school crush, teenage Paris Hilton. Nevertheless, I was certain, that the real deal would substitute Hollywood with character.
She had a classic, dignified non-chalance that had me hooked. Her personality seemed admirable, but I knew I needed to learn more. For two years she had entirely refrained from alcohol, and she had never had any narcotic forays (allegedly) save a short coke stint her Senior year of college, which precipitated the reason behind my primary cause for concern: she is intimately involved with a local AA chapter. I have witnessed the types that frequent those meetings and I have gotten a sense of the general atmosphere itself, finding it both unbecoming and troubling. Maybe it is a good thing she got the help she needed, but I am playing the odds here. I wondered if she was sexually involved with any of the members, perhaps one of the older ones who I know often develop relationships through the various AA power structures. Her having issues with her father played no small part in that worry.
She discussed with me her wilder college years. She was apparently a staple at the more exclusive nightclubs in the city for practically all four years of study. I was not entirely shocked to hear this and can surmise the colossal amount of attention she must have commanded as a young, statuesque blond. She possessed dangerously piercing eyes of green, blue and gray shades that caused light hitting them to shimmer and dance. She is the type that seldom fails to paralyze her prey with little more than a gaze. She explained her heavy alcohol usage during this time, and it made me painfully ponder again how many strange cocks had slithered around defiling her.
Once while conversing in bedroom talk, the specifics alluding me, she appeared to remark in an off-handed tone, "The darker, the better!" Taken aback, I wondered if she had suffered a Freudian slip. I would be lying if I told you that I was not haunted from time to time after that point by an image of an oversized and menacing dark purple and black negroid appendage that would produce immediate nausea and anxiety. You can imagine how I had become doubly concerned following suspicions that her prior lover was a tall and handsome Arab employed in the arts. I was envious of his stature, if nothing else, as she was very tall, and I was only her height or so, and visually I felt lacking in the physically imposing department relative to her (thought being women desire more strongly men that can physically subdue them with ease). I should work out. It felt a little cheapened that my years of schooling, high performance, sacrifice of social life, and significant achievements had more or less concluded with my car being parked in the same garage as an Arab schmuck. I am a Banker, I told myself.
I soon thereafter asked her if we were going to get married, and she told me that she thought so. She purchased a classic book for me on the individual's psychic journey through life, telling me it reminded her of me. I noticed in the book two primary characters, star crossed lovers of sorts, that seemed to closely resemble the ebbs and flows of my life with her. This was a fairytale, I thought. I paraded her around the neighborhood that morning and we went for a walk in the Park. I took her to one of the nicest bars in the City, and we sat in the same seat Paul McCartney was sitting in with his fiance the weekend prior. I had finally arrived. I refrain from sex before marriage now, but I saw a legitimate marriage opportunity here. Intercourse with her was more pleasurable than any other woman I have ever experienced by far. Her shape and texture was divine. She was extremely orgasmic. And then, basically, my worst fears came true.
We got upon the topic of high school, and she described her general experiences. Against her parents' wishes, especially her father's, she volunteered to visit South America for relief work, teaching or something or other. I am nearly always wary of women that travel to far off and brutish locales under the guise of charity. I asked where she stayed, and she told me it was with a local family. She was 16 years old at the time. She admitted to making the "mistake" of deciding to visit a local bar one night with a male neighbhor who was more than double her age. She told me she became extremely intoxicated over the course of the night. She told me that he took her home that night and raped her. She told me he took her virginity. That is how she lost her virginity. She said she did not tell anyone, but visited a doctor for STD testing upon arrival home. I do not remember much after that point because my memory sort of just blacked out afterwards. It did not register at first, but then it sunk in, and in an instant I knew it was all over, forever. I could not help but imagine some dark, dirty, old, indigenous farm hand ruffian with a belly and disgusting uncut large member violating the girl I have been dreaming about since I was a little boy throwing coins in to the wishing wells. I kept visualizing how that scene might have appeared if I were a fly on the wall. Did she want that to happen all along? Was she scoping him out from the very beginning? Was she in to it? How proud was that savage that he got to do that with a girl like her? I bet she orgasmed. I'm not even sure about how I feel regarding my emotions on this issue. I was and am still livid, and disgusted. I feel it is unfair for him to have had her so young given the amount I am willing to dedicate for her now (my life). She proudly went on other "study abroads" subsequently.
My heart was eviscerated.
I don't care what you think about casual sex. We could have kept it like the old days and maintained real whores for that. Now we are making whoredom the default for all women. The hymen exists for a reason. Chastity is extremely important for pair bonding, love and therefore all things good in the world. The current dating market can not support women and certainly not men that are reaching for higher ideals. It will eat you up and spit you out if you do. The "free market" in dating elicits the tragedy of the commons and completely destroys incentive structures. We are incentivized to make decisions that lead to the destruction of happy, healthy, empathetic, benevolent societies. Being a player and practicing hypergamy are prerequisites now. When I need sex ASAP, I will hire (and there are better options than escorts). For my wife, I'm going the religion route.
Obviously, Chad and hot girls have it the best. But ultimately we need everyone to play by the rules.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3629348&forum_id=2#33418386) |
Date: May 29th, 2017 12:36 AM Author: Titillating senate indirect expression
OP if you want XO to succeed you need to stop writing things that make poasters want to kill themselves
I know a girl like this, but instead of wanting to marry me she is marrying some nigger she met on one of her trips to the third world, why go on knowing you've been bested by some smelly savage chimp...
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3629348&forum_id=2#33418509)
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Date: May 29th, 2017 1:46 AM Author: Bright hairraiser location police squad
Oh, I am very well aware of these comics and thought of them frequently during the roughly 12 hours that I spent intermittently writing and editing my poast in between doing other work.
She is two years out of college, so about 24. I approximate that as being the upper limit for guys 30 and below. Going closer to 22 and expecting marriage track women in MFH is not easy. Every single girl wants to experience her inner whore.
They come to this city and they just can NOT WAIT one bit to start spreading those legs all day long.
The absolutely NEED this CUM FIESTA asap upon arrival.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3629348&forum_id=2#33418845) |
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