I am not very picky about age. I'd prob date up to 45 at this point. Divorces are ok as long as they don't have kids.

I am not very picky about looks, except as we all know I vastly prefer tall men. But in reality I'd probably date a dude as short as 5'10. I am not picky about body type either. Just don't be fat or a string bean. I'm also not into freakishly muscular, body builder type men.

Be honest: starting today, so you think it's too late to find a man to marry or spend my life with (since I don't want kids, the ring itself isn't as important as having a committed life partner)

I don't care about race, although I tend not to be attracted to Asian or Indian men. I am probably most attracted to black and white men, but open to all groups theoretically.

I want a man with a dominant/aggressive "Chad" personality, but he doesn't have to be a Chad (hot, rich, popular, etc.)he should be good in bed but only needs an average size penis. I'm not a size queens. He should be VERY dominant and enjoy controlling me in bed.

I don't need a rich guy. I just want someone with a college degree. A librarian or teacher making $50k a year for example would be fine.

I like manly men - guys who are good with cars, fixing shit around the house, electronics, that kinda thing. He should like sports - be really into at least one of baseball, basketball, football or hockey.

I'd like a guy who's social. He should have a lot of friends, be willing to befriend my friends and enjoy going out to restaurants, bars, lounges, clubs, shows, sporting events, etc. I love travel and he should be willing to accompany me a couple of times a year.

So what do y'all think? Realistic? Am I asking too much? Please real, thoughtful responses only, not just mean shit saying I'm an ugly shrew who will die alone. Thanks! :)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683869)

Great, why marry if no one wants kids? Sounds lame.

// I am not very picky about age. I'd prob date up to 45 at this point. Divorces are ok as long as they don't have kids.

Sure but might want to bump it up to 60.

// I am not very picky about looks, except as we all know I vastly prefer tall men. But in reality I'd probably date a dude as short as 5'10. I am not picky about body type either. Just don't be fat or a string bean. I'm also not into freakishly muscular, body builder type men.

Lower to 5'8" and over 55 and I think you've got yourself a good market.

// Be honest: starting today, so you think it's too late to find a man to marry or spend my life with (since I don't want kids, the ring itself isn't as important as having a committed life partner)

As long as the person is VERY undesirable, it might work.

// I don't care about race, although I tend not to be attracted to Asian or Indian men. I am probably most attracted to black and white men, but open to all groups theoretically.

Well, bad news. Whites/Blacks are the top market choices here. You'll likely get some sort of mexican.

// I want a man with a dominant/aggressive "Chad" personality, but he doesn't have to be a Chad (hot, rich, popular, etc.)he should be good in bed but only needs an average size penis. I'm not a size queens. He should be VERY dominant and enjoy controlling me in bed.

Exactly, a short mexican with lots of attitude and machismo. PERFECT.

// I don't need a rich guy. I just want someone with a college degree. A librarian or teacher making $50k a year for example would be fine.

NO. You don't get white collar guys. Get a HVAC mexican, they make more anyway.

// I like manly men - guys who are good with cars, fixing shit around the house, electronics, that kinda thing. He should like sports - be really into at least one of baseball, basketball, football or hockey.

See above.

// I'd like a guy who's social. He should have a lot of friends, be willing to befriend my friends and enjoy going out to restaurants, bars, lounges, clubs, shows, sporting events, etc. I love travel and he should be willing to accompany me a couple of times a year.

See above.

// So what do y'all think? Realistic? Am I asking too much? Please real, thoughtful responses only, not just mean shit saying I'm an ugly shrew who will

die alone. Thanks! :)

A 52/55+ Mexican male who is at the end of a good blue collar career is PERFECT. And when he dies young he'll leave you a little nest egg.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684906)

Mexican's are literally KKK level racist. Not sure why Blacks vote Dem to import them into USA en masse.

That said, she can find some other kind of Hispanic that's less racist -- EG an heavily african Dominican.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684967)

33 is cutting it close for a guy.

I'm not reading that longass OP.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34687032)

At that moment, she decided to quit her job, sell her possessions on Craigslist and spend the next year in Europe. Eight days later, she was on an airplane with no clue what to do next.

So, what exactly is a Jesus Year? The term cropped up periodically on early blogs and Myspace pages, but only now appears to be gaining traction among those trying to make the increasingly difficult transition from adolescence to adulthood.

This is the definition found in the Urban Dictionary: "Time to get moving and get things done (maybe)." And one of the first mainstream uses appears in a 1996 Chicago Sun-Times article about Tennessee-born singer-songwriter R.B. Morris, who refers cryptically to having done a "Jesus Year" but offers no details.

Brooklyn-based artist Wayne Adams is more forthcoming. "Thirty-three is largely considered the age Jesus Christ was when His life and ministry were abruptly ended in His crucifixion," he explains on the blog Curator, adding that, as he approached his own Jesus Year, "in the back of my mind, it seemed like there was a sort of historical/biblical precedent for being at the height of one's career, or at least doing something incredibly important at that age."

But the impulse is more spiritual than overtly Christian. To paraphrase comedian Bill Hicks, who died two months short of the start of his own Jesus Year, we live in a culture that commemorates the death and resurrection of its messiah by telling children a giant bunny rabbit leaves chocolate eggs while they sleep. This is a generation of people obsessed with vampires and zombies who grew up in a world that prints more copies of the Ikea catalogue than the Bible. Is it any surprise that their search for meaning is being played out on social media?

A recent study by British social-networking site Friends United asserts that the year is the happiest time of our lives. "By this age, innocence has been lost, but our sense of reality is mixed with a strong sense of hope, a 'can do' spirit, and a healthy belief in our own talents and abilities," says psychologist Donna Dawson, best known as Company magazine's first Agony Aunt.

This interpretation doesn't, however, take into account the frustrations faced by today's thirtysomethings. "The basic milestones that young people of previous generations could expect to complete by the age of 30 – graduating school, leaving home, becoming financial independent and forming their own families – aren't necessarily occurring in that standard fashion," says Barbara Mitchell, who teaches sociology at Simon Fraser University in Vancouver.

"It's unprecedented from a historical perspective. On the one hand, they have all these opportunities and options. On the other hand, I can imagine they'd start to feel somewhat anxious about trying to transition into complete adulthood in an economy that doesn't allow them to do that."

According to Prof. Mitchell, the Jesus Year phenomenon demonstrates how so-called emerging adults are trying to connect their own experience to something transcendental and more profound than mundane daily life. "They are trying to anchor themselves in something bigger than themselves."

So, the Jesus Year has become a meme for dealing with, not a mid-life crisis but rather a stalled-life crisis.

"That's what really stood out to me – that there is a name for this early 30s malaise thing that I see in all of my friends," Ms. Sundel says. "By 35, especially for women, you have to be married with babies; otherwise you kind of missed your time."

She interpreted the Jesus Year as an opportunity for reinvention, a kind of bonus year off from the pressures of adulthood, and embarked upon a year of self-improvement and magical thinking. She travelled. She gathered her rosebuds. She took lots of photos and posted them on social media. For her, the Jesus Year is a bricolage of all the popular "years of" quests that came before – eating in Italy, praying in India, cooking all of Julia Childs's recipes, reading every volume of the Oxford English Dictionary.

Mr. Adams, on the other hand, became a vegetarian. "If Jesus was at the core, it seemed to make killing and eating His creation a bit more significant.

"I don't know if all of this made me any more like Jesus, but I do think it has helped make me a little more conscientious in general."

The feeling didn't last. He began his 34th year by eating meat for the first time in 365 days, a lamb chop. "And," he concludes with more than a touch of irony, "it was good."

A search for meaning

Ignoring the robust scholarly debate over how old Jesus was when he was crucified – or the fact that 33 was hardly young in 33 AD – the most profound reality of this age today is that it's the last gasp before you leave the valuable under-35 demographic. You are becoming less valuable to the marketing machine that had praised you since your teens. All the things you bought don't love you back. The rub, of course, is where do you turn instead?

"I just spent so many years talking to other people about their lives, I was kind of ignoring my life," Ms. Sundel says. "I had absolutely no more heart left in what I was doing. I was really having a crisis of creativity, which sounds very pretentious. I used to be a creative person. I used to be a complete person. How did I get on this hamster wheel of work? How did all of my identity go into that?"

The quest for deeper meaning comes as no surprise to Mardi Tindal, the 40th moderator of the United Church of Canada. She suspects the Jesus Year speaks to a longing everyone has to be more than themselves.

"Those in their 30s now, as Douglas Coupland said, are the first generation to be raised without religion," she explains. "If they turn to Jesus, it wouldn't surprise me. He was a model for living a life of transcendence."

Happiness is very much on Ms. Tindal's mind at the moment. She recently returned from New York, having been invited by the prime minister of Bhutan to participate in a high-level United Nations conference. The goal? To find a place for a "gross national happiness" metric in a global economic system hell bent on gross domestic product.

"We're not talking about a superficial kind of happiness," she says. "We're talking about a deep sense of well-being."

That Ms. Sundel happens to be Jewish is a sign of the Jesus Year's widespread appeal. "Want to know what's weird?" she confides. "I was brought up more religious than your average Jew. Like my parents are the kind of people that will tell me that they're going to disown me if I don't marry a Jew. But they immediately got it – as did all their friends. In a weird way, their Jewish friends in their 60s in Florida are some of my biggest supporters. They saw it for the quest aspects and the discoveries."

She pauses. She has the over-conscious sensibility of one who has become a believer – in something – despite her natural instincts. "I thought maybe I would be taking more heat from religious Christians, but in fact they're like, 'I never thought about 33 as being such a special year.'"

Reinvention, it seems, is an incredibly powerful image. Even the strangers who showed up to buy her stuff off Craigslist expressed a surprisingly deep admiration for what she was doing.

When her grandfather died midway through her Jesus Year, she was alone in Paris, devastated. A guy from Canada she knew only as Joe contacted her, one searcher to another. "He said he wanted to be a kind of like an angel to me, to tell me that what I was doing was meaningful and that it had effected him," she recalls. "Honestly, that moment alone was worth the whole year for me."

A visit to Joe's blog, NoFixedAddress, reveals the epiphanies of a young backpacker out on a gap year. "I've learned that the world is full of people quick to tell you the things you can't do, the things you shouldn't do and the things that won't work," he writes. "The instant you ignore them, you will meet the people who will tell you all the things you can do, all the things that are possible, and how to fix the things that aren't working."

What would Jobs do?

It's not insignificant that on the last day of her Jesus Year, Ms. Sundel ended her blog post by quoting Silicon Valley icon Steve Jobs, who consistently interrupted his business ventures to embark upon spiritual quests: "You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever."

Ms. Sundel's epiphanies, sprinkled throughout the 33 – yes, 33 – pages on her Tumblr blog, are not unlike what you'd hear on a Sunday morning in any reasonable place of worship. "The ideas, I think, are in line with Jesus's teaching: to help each other, and try to see the good in other people. To have meaningful connections to other people, and not just superficial ones."

The now 34-year-old is back in the United States and is pitching her Jesus Year project as a book, a sign that today's path to enlightenment has not only been paved by Jesus, but also by Eat, Pray, Love's Elizabeth Gilbert.

"I'm not surprised," Prof. Mitchell remarks. "It's a trademark of today's technologically savvy, social networking young adult. They have to be creative and innovative in terms of thinking about the possibilities of earning a living."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683879)

in MFH uhh I don't understand the question. millions of balding single dorks like your ex

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683881)

probably worry about the drug addiction first though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683898)

LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683950)

this is shtick right

actually it's even funnier if you're serious

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683889)

I made 70k straight out of college

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683919)

It's like calling a Physicians Assistant a Physician.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684869)

In America: no.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683911)

Anyway, am I being TOO PICKY?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683992)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684510)

At this point, the average IQ of people without college degrees is almost the same as people with college degrees because do many dumbs go to college.

TONS of 120+ IQ non-college White bros out there making good money.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684889)

Requiring a college degree eliminates over half of men without providing any real benefit. At this point a college degree guarantees nothing except that you graduated from college. Better imo to think of specific traits youre looking for (intelligence, reliability, career dedication/work ethic) and to select based on that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684974)

In my breakup thread you guys ROASTED me because I said I would be happier with a person that was more of a reader and intellectually engaged. Now you're telling Blue Smoke she's being dense by wanting a guy with a college education?

I understand that edgy+cool XO wants to devalue education as much as possible since it has turned into a fraudlie$ industry but this shit is ridiculous. She's smart and she went to Yale. She's not untethered from reality because she wants to be with a guy that went to college.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34685878)

It's particularly absurd because you want a man who is good at, you know, manly man stuff (cars & fixing stuff around the house). But if he's so good at it that he makes a comfortable living as a mechanic or HVAC bro and never went to college because you don't need college for those jobs, it's an autoding? You can be as picky as you like, but you're counting out a large section of the population.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684662)

is 5'10 tall?

How often do Asians and Indians date black women anyway

I didn't say he had to be great in bed just dominant. Aren't most men dominant?

What's wrong with being bl ack?

I haven't done heroin in ages

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684368)

White and black guys each average about 5'10". BUT, the tallmos get married off earlier and/or are already in relationships.

Average height of SINGLE guys over 30, is probably 5'8".

So if you need 5'10" + you are eliminating about 65% of guys.

So just with the college and the height requirement, you're left with about 10% of single guys meeting your criteria. (0.35 * 0.3)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684899)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683935)

Men start with insane expectations and no sexual market value and are forced to confront some hard facts early, while their junior high classmates are fucking high school kids and then their high school classmates are fucking students from the local college and then their college classmates are fucking guys in their thirties. Men learn to keep an open mind early, then things get progressively easier as their sexual market value climbs and they become the one with the status&money chasing the younger girls.

Women, on the other hand, start with insane sexual market value and quickly calibrate their expansions to sky-high levels. Then they crater at 30 and whittle down their "list" to "just ten demands!" and feel like they're being so open-minded. Meanwhile the guys their age are fucking women in their mid-20's. LJL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684027)

Not all men survive their involuntary celibate age though.. they become defeatists and stopped trying to improve themselves and settle into a low paying jobs and become alcoholics.

Men like me had limited but encouraging success with women early on, became obsessed with chasing pussy, worked everyday to improve myself, become well established in their 30s, will get all the loot.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684083)

Absolutely disgusting! Can you please share some real life examples of this so I know how to identify this behavior in the future?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34683988)

Seriously most retarded thing ever.

Lay off the DOPE, ya dope.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684025)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684028)

About 1/3 of the country 25+ has a bachelor's degree.

Stats on how many men want kids vary, but safe to say that a majority (75%+?) are strongly committed to the idea and, what's more, they want the mother of their children to be younger than you are now, let alone how old you would be by the time you formed relationship, got married, etc. (And, by the way, for the men who DON'T want kids, they are frequently dating younger women who are not yet seriously thinking about a family.)

Obviously there's overlap between these groups, but an above average height, college educated man who doesn't want kids being interested in a women your age is a fucking unicorn and that's before getting into your other hard to quantify shit. You might not be too old to find a husband, but you are too old to find the husband you describe. Perhaps you should have married your organic relationship ten years ago.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684087)

jfc women.

i'm a somehow still moderately attractive late 30s man with a full head of non-gray hair, big shoulders, but a bad alcoholic, and i'm reasonable about my limits. the fairy tale should probably end at 30. or at least at heroin.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684089)

I would imagine drug addicts are not a popular option in the marriage market.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684104)

If you say Yalies come from good successful families, well I can figure out whether a girl comes from a good, successful family without relying on a Yale degree,

If you say Yalies are smart, well I can tell whether a girl is smart or not just by interacting with her. The fact that she went to Yale vs Wisconsin on a full ride makes little difference to me and most men.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684144)

(Unless you will have kids who can use the legacy boost, but here that's not the case)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684937)

>> He should...be willing to befriend my friends and enjoy going out to restaurants, bars, lounges, clubs, shows, sporting events, etc. I love travel and he should be willing to accompany me a couple of times a year. <<

These two seem in conflict to me. That or you're naive about what shit costs.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684111)

but i'm honestly being too harsh. i have problems as does she. so i do have a lot of sympathy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684127)

it's clear she expects the dude she settles with to have some cool job where he makes decent money. lol at $50K. okie dokie BS, you're totally going to settle down with some guy who works the graveyard shift putting out road cones making a modest union wage.

this is like her demanding that XO tell her she can have a smoking hot 9+ body if she just gets into shape. "oh hey guis, anyone want to assure me that a tall, fit, smart, social, cool alpha guy who can rail me like a pro and will fund my late-in-life travel shrew fantasies is well within my reach?"

are people always this pie in the sky the second week they're off heroin for the first time in 8 years?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34685594)

might be wrong.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684179)

That being said, I think its important that you think about what youre looking for and keep an open mind. Listing "college degree" as a requirement may seem reasonable, but in reality if you refuse to date anyone without one that eliminates half of men right there. Requiring a college degree specifically is just you internalizing societal/GC flame that you need a college degree to be successful or "educated". Plenty of blue collar guys are reasonably intelligent and theyre more likely to have the manly traits youre looking for. Just a thought.

This is jcm btw

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684188)

it's never too late for love.

look it up.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684192)

I know the way you feel

I've felt your pain

And I know your sorrow

You could try to let the past slip away

Live for today

Don't stop believing in tomorrow

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684212)

it's too late to find real "love"

you'll just find a beta provider you can use. your description of what you want indicates this. "doesn't need to be rich ... but needs to provide me with three international vacations a year, plus constant disposable spending"

also in on 200+ thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684199)

2. Keep a clean home

3. Be open to having kids if conditions are right

4. Demonstrate that you are fun / friendly with family. That you can hold ppl down in a pinch.

5. Fuck em good

6. Dont nag the guy to do bunch of instagram shit. Let him do him and you do you.

7. Be cute. When he is talking about stuff open your eyes wide and give him laser attention like hes sooo smart and wow interesting. You have to respond with things that show that you are listening.

If you do these things you will likely find a man and have him so dependent on you he wont even know what to do. If you are a psycho you can prolly start abusing him at this point as he is your mind slave. If you are nice you will see him for the puppy dawg that he is and help each other grow and share and love dovey.

Addiction will basically gurantee that the person you attract will have problems. Also you have to show that you are a fighter. Nice in day to day interactions but not afraid to lay down the law. If you seem timid then you will attract whacko abusive men.

My 2 cents gl girl

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34684333)

First thing first is for her to GTFO of NYC though.

Go up to Albany or Rochester or Buffallo and will be in much better shape.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34685054)

lol at your reflex to always subtly shit on other people

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34685606)

http://autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3700811&mc=212&forum_id=2#33994025

BS can do better esp since she doesn’t look 33.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3796937&forum_id=2#34687534)