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180 introvert lifehack: When delivery guy comes, pretend you have phone call
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:48 PM Author: Violent university *knock knock*
*pick up smart phone, put it to your ear*
(loudly) "Yeah, sorry, I have a delivery... one second..."
*opens door*
"Go ahead and cross-check against the 42-NXD database. I'll deploy a script in the . . ."
*as you drone on with made up bullshit the delivery guy wordlessly hands over bag and, if applicable, credit card slip for signing*
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:49 PM Author: fantasy-prone impertinent step-uncle's house *phone actually goes off* (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742640) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:49 PM Author: Sapphire sound barrier “Hold on, ive got someone on the other line” (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742648) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:55 PM Author: Violent university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742737) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 10:58 PM Author: brindle bawdyhouse boistinker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34745279) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:45 AM Author: exciting poppy liquid oxygen puppy lol at introverts thinking that quickly (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34748051) |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 11:42 AM Author: exhilarant abode (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35526434) |
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Date: August 21st, 2018 10:13 PM Author: Orchid stirring property (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#36659699) |
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Date: February 28th, 2021 11:50 AM Author: exciting poppy liquid oxygen puppy Lol at introverts thinking on their toes like that instead of just panicking and being awkward (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#42022705) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:58 PM Author: Internet-worthy Crotch Garrison (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742762) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:06 PM Author: exhilarant abode (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742834) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:06 PM Author: Violent university A PRO introvert would have his phone off if he didn't feel like talking to anybody anyway. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742835) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:08 PM Author: Internet-worthy Crotch Garrison haha
but what about lack of light appearing on the side of your face? |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:10 PM Author: Violent university What about it? Maybe my phone is setup so the screen turns off if I've been on a call for a bit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742871) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:12 PM Author: Internet-worthy Crotch Garrison lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742885) |
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Date: March 4th, 2018 11:23 PM Author: sickened sinister indirect expression What if the delivery guy acuses you of faking the call and asks to see the phone (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35535977) |
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Date: April 11th, 2018 7:28 PM Author: Violent university "Excuse me, I have to handle this delivery guy for a second... SIR. HOW DARE YOU." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35819424) |
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Date: April 11th, 2018 7:32 PM Author: hairraiser voyeur (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35819446) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:27 PM Author: Mildly Autistic Space (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743044) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:51 PM Author: Lascivious parlour i have a good friend -- whenever i go to his place and we order delivery food, he wants me to make the phone call and answer the door. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742678) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:05 PM Author: Violent university Fuck yeah, doing the call is awful. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742830) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:18 PM Author: Lascivious parlour i guess i win at something in life:
being able to make the phone call to order food from a delivery joint.
i think my friend is actually getting better. i can tell he listens to me and how i interact, and tries to adopt it, and he does it pretty well. |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:48 PM Author: Violent university It's not the ability, more that it's a nuisance.
Like, as an in-house bro, I never have to check to make sure my defined terms are consistent, every defined term is used at least once, etc. I could do that shit if I had to, but one way or another I can push it down and even if I'm the one who fucks it up I'll just get a draft back with the polite "Just corrected a few nits!" You are the guy doing the defined term check for your friend. |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 9:57 AM Author: Mustard Gas Station Genital Piercing (Guy about to get Single White Femaled)
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:18 PM Author: Aqua internal respiration alpha Refuse to order anywhere that doesn't take online orders. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742947) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:40 PM Author: Violent university Fucking CR. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743181) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:26 PM Author: Soggy spectacular spot I have a friend that does the same thing. When I did make him do it once, he got frustrated on the call and really butchered trying to place the order and we ended up with the wrong stuff (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743038) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:46 PM Author: Lascivious parlour lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743228) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 8:51 PM Author: Arousing citrine ticket booth hominid Who the hell calls for delivery anymore? No UberEats, Grubhub, or Caviar near you? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34744329) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:47 AM Author: exciting poppy liquid oxygen puppy stfu gook (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34748070) |
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Date: February 28th, 2021 11:51 AM Author: exciting poppy liquid oxygen puppy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#42022709) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:52 PM Author: aphrodisiac school cafeteria sex offender can't imagine being this weird irl (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742692) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:06 PM Author: Violent university I really like it here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742838) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 5:59 PM Author: Out-of-control coiffed therapy native this isnt an introvert life hack, its a bizarre avoidance device by people that probably have debilitating social anxiety (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742766) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:01 PM Author: Violent university I really like it here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742775) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 11:01 PM Author: rusted yarmulke boltzmann spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34745300) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:00 PM Author: Magenta marketing idea This is perfect, I'm looking to cut out what little human interaction remains in my life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742769) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:07 PM Author: Violent university With patience and diligence, it can be done. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742841) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:01 PM Author: Passionate meetinghouse brethren lol at autism (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742782) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:06 PM Author: Violent university I really like it here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742840) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:06 PM Author: Motley Lilac Casino Your delivery guys speak English? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742839) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:08 PM Author: Violent university Maybe the delivery gods just have a sense of humor, but not only do they speak English, they just always thinks there's so much to talk about. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742852) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:17 PM Author: Motley Lilac Casino That's madness, my dudes usually can't even say how much the total is in English and after trying to pantomime or say it in Spanish just hand me the receipt. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34742939) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 8:49 PM Author: Violent university Where do you order from? I may have to check them out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34744319) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 8:43 PM Author: painfully honest keepsake machete digit ratio (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35524010) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:16 PM Author: gold trust fund people who are hurt "Consistent with natural law, the UCMJ, and non-binding but guiding international treaty precedent, I refuse to follow that order and will not release those codes to you, sir."
{turning head from phone} "Did they include anchovies? Last time they forgot the anchovies." |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:38 PM Author: Violent university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743164) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:24 PM Author: Diverse Round Eye Theater what if ur wondering where they are so you peek outside and see them coming 30 feet away and you are about to dart back inside but they have already seen you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743005) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:38 PM Author: Violent university Jfc don't even joke about this. MODS.
Obviously, the correct answer is to never get into that situation. The food will come when it comes. Looking out the door either achieves nothing or puts you in the nightmare scenario. Resist the temptation to check, because the payoff matrix is all zero or negative. |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:28 PM Author: Vibrant set god, i am so glad i am not this introverted and autistic (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743050) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:29 PM Author: Internet-worthy Crotch Garrison "hi delivery guy-delivery person <3" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743062) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:30 PM Author: Vibrant set hiiiiiii! how are you tonight? thank you so much for bringing me dinner! * gives $5 tip on $14 bill and draws a smiley face on the receipt* have a good night! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743071) |
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Date: August 21st, 2018 10:15 PM Author: Sapphire sound barrier (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#36659707) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 6:40 PM Author: Violent university I really like it here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34743177) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 9:38 PM Author: irradiated stead mexican The government needs to sterilize you people (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34744608) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2017 8:55 AM Author: Violent university I assure you, Tinder already did it for you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34747005) |
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Date: November 21st, 2017 9:41 PM Author: bisexual base volcanic crater So weird. Why do you need to talk to the delivery guy? Are you from a small town or something? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#34744624) |
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Date: November 22nd, 2017 12:46 PM Author: Violent university I don't, he wants to talk to me. I fucking hate the small talk.
From a small town, but don't currently live in one. |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 5:06 PM Author: Violent university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35522503) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 5:14 PM Author: Pearly nursing home just have a barking dog (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35522545) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 8:38 PM Author: Violent university This implies being a place-goer and thing-doer that walks his dog. LJL not falling for that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35523990) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 8:41 PM Author: Buff French International Law Enforcement Agency Cruise Ship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35524002) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 8:46 PM Author: outnumbered sanctuary police squad I was out on my balcony in shorts and T-shirt in 25 degree weather using hand signals to guide my delivery guy to my place today (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35524019) |
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Date: March 2nd, 2018 10:17 PM Author: Violent university lol what the fuck. how does he not have a smartphone with GPS? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35524554) |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 3:04 AM Author: outnumbered sanctuary police squad I live in a huge soviet building that has like 3 addresses and. 8 entrances (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35525629) |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 9:45 AM Author: Violent university wtf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35526092) |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 10:57 AM Author: outnumbered sanctuary police squad velcum to yukraine (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35526305) |
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Date: March 3rd, 2018 11:01 AM Author: Walnut Slap-happy Gaping Church this is why i don’t use uber or lyft, those fuckers always wanting to make small talk. i rent a car with executive aisle privileges where i can just scan the barcode and leave sight unseen.
even when i have to travel for work from my home, i rent a car at the airport the preceding evening and drive it to the airport so i don’t have to take ancab or uber. |
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Date: March 4th, 2018 11:20 PM Author: Violent university On the app you can just leave it as a note to the driver that you're deaf. Really cuts down on smalltalk. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#35535969) |
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Date: August 21st, 2018 10:10 PM Author: Violent university Did this again today, avoided a very unnecessary conversation with somebody who definitely looked like a talker. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#36659682) |
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Date: August 21st, 2018 10:14 PM Author: Orchid stirring property I always pack 3 bluetooth headsets and a pair of gaming headphones for this eventuality when travelinf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#36659701) |
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Date: March 7th, 2019 5:54 PM Author: Violent university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#37894562) |
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Date: August 21st, 2018 10:20 PM Author: azure bull headed house jap (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#36659734) |
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Date: December 24th, 2019 6:50 PM Author: Violent university Just did this with my headset on so I didn't have to chat with the guy who delivered Christmas Eve dinner (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#39320395) |
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Date: December 24th, 2019 6:51 PM Author: adventurous copper juggernaut psychic (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3805079&forum_id=2#39320400) |
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Date: February 28th, 2021 11:48 AM Author: Violent university OP here and was just going through my "BY YOU."
This lifehack is now obsolete with distance delivery, thanks fraudvirus. |