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i'm becoming really cynical and disillusioned, this sucks
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:14 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i see cute, happy girls and can't help but think that half of them it's an act, and the other half are just idiots; it's just a human body that eats and sweats and shits. for example:
https://www.reddit.com/r/HappyEmbarrassedGirls/top/?sort=top&t=year
same shit happens with music, it's been a very long time since i've heard something that didn't strike me as overproduced and inauthentic.
i can't get excited for holidays anymore. i can barely get myself to buy a christmas tree this year. i will because of my wife and kids, but i don't give a shit.
i used to celebrate the success of others, now i think it's luck and family and connections, and have become equal parts competitive with and dismissive of peers.
i'm not bitter, i'm just finding it increasingly harder to get excited about things. i've always been someone who enjoyed the moment, got excited for everything, was really into holidays, didn't mind waiting in line for something because it was going to be worth it, always found the mystery and wonder and surprise in life. most days now, i don't.
drinking used to stave off these thoughts but now it seems to intensify them. this sucks.
anyone else go through this? |
Date: November 26th, 2017 1:16 AM Author: Wonderful national Welcome to reality, at least it's not forever. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773007) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:25 AM Author: shivering dilemma *realiti (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773034) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:43 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773088) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:16 AM Author: Soul-stirring Spot Sounds like classic depression with anhedonia. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773010) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:20 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw anhedonia is far too extreme. i definitely still feel pleasure. i had a salted pretzel with nacho cheese earlier today combined with an oatmeal raisin walnut cookie and it was sublime. those 10 minutes i spent eating those things away from everything else, i enjoyed them very much.
i also still have moments of ambition, but they're farther and farther apart. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:20 AM Author: Soul-stirring Spot have you tried a hobby. sounds like you like food, what about cooking or going to expensive restaurants (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773020) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:26 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i've done both of those. i like cooking, but it feels played out for me. i'm not great, not even good, but i've cooked a lot and i'm not excited anymore to try new things. expensive restaurants were fun for a few years, but now i see them all as flame. feel like i've explored that and am done now.
maybe i need new hobbies? i don't know. at this point in my life, i've started enough new hobbies that i know what the process is like, and right now, i don't feel like exploring anything new. maybe i need to though. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:44 AM Author: Amber thriller azn Reflecting on the comment below about lacking friends, you should use existing hobbies to find friends or else pick on that will help you get them. Humans crave relationships and I suspect a lot of your misery is from a lack of real human communication that isn't within your family. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773089) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:47 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw maybe. i do interact with a ton of people. i have a lot of professional relationships. on average, 3-4 lunches per week are with people i have professional relationships with. i talk to other people at the office every day. that probably doesn't count though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773097) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:50 AM Author: Amber thriller azn Do you not consider any of these professional relationships to be friendships as well? Have you ever tried doing something with them that isn't work or a lunch? You might have some interests in common with them.
A lot of my D.C. friends are current or former co-workers and I hang out with them all the time. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:12 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw no. always thought the professional risk was too great. my non-work hobbies are either prole or weird. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773182) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:16 AM Author: Amber thriller azn You might be surprised. I've gotten multiple co-workers into my kooky 6-hour board game hobby so I'd say anything is possible. You may be overly self-conscious about your interests.
I don't see any professional risk to making friends with co-workers unless you tend to have friendships end badly somehow. If anything, it's a boon, because friends in your industry can actively watch your back and help you out.
That said, maybe I just lack an understanding of how other industries work. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:28 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i'm a solo lawyer, so no coworkers, only subordinates. all of my professional relationships are schmoozing to get business.
i would love if i could find guys to play Axis and Allies, but everyone i've ever met into games like that is not remotely at a similar professional level. everyone i interact with professionally seems to be into very physical hobbies like cycling, hiking or basketball. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:47 AM Author: Amber thriller azn Ah, this makes more sense then. Professional friend-getting is probably not going to work well.
In that case, you'll need to be more active in the pursuit. There are clubs for almost anything which could be at least worth making a pass at. Find people who you get along with and share some kind of interest with, and invite them over for a couple hours or something.
Friends are invaluable, and having a family alone isn't a substitute. Making them is harder as you age, but on the plus side the older they are the less apt they are to move away. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:17 AM Author: Cruel-hearted church How much are you exercising? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773011) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:21 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw not at all, unless you count carrying your kids and all their shit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773022) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:25 AM Author: Cruel-hearted church Start. 95% chance you’ll start feeling better with a regular exercise routine.
And if it doesn’t work, at least you got in slightly better shape?
Everyone struggles with this shit. Jordan Peterson has also helped me https://www.reddit.com/r/JordanPeterson/comments/6hu4z6/a_collection_of_jordan_peterson_quotes_i_put/?st=JAGDRSBY&sh=bacd7e19 |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:40 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw ty, maybe i'll try it. what do you like about Jordan Peterson? i've seen his name a lot, what makes him worth listening to? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773080) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:48 AM Author: Cruel-hearted church This is essentially his message In a nutshell
https://youtu.be/-XvI6Y5Yq8o |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:54 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i don't feel angry or bitter about anything. i'm just having a hard time being excited about or interested in anything. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773121) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:55 AM Author: Cruel-hearted church You need some kind of meaning and to connect the monotonous parts of life to that meaning (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773124) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:13 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i care about my family, greatly, so there's that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773184) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:20 AM Author: Amber thriller azn That's a good building block, but you don't want your family to exist in isolation. Having a robust network of friends and a worldview that your family fits into would probably help.
Are you a godmo at all? If you're open to it a faith community can help a lot with the latter bit, but it will only work if you genuinely care about it. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:29 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw i grew up religious and really miss the community that came from church. i wish i still had it. i don't have any faith though and neither does my wife. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773229) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:42 AM Author: Amber thriller azn If you once had it and wish you still did, why did you ditch it? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773270) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:46 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw no faith. i liked the community part though and do miss it. just can't stand the actual belief part anymore.
it's probably relevant that i was raised in an intense evangelical church and not a more chill catholic or protestant one. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:56 AM Author: Amber thriller azn Yeah, I can see that happening. I can certainly make many criticisms of evangelical Christianity. Mainline prots, Orthodoxy, or Catholicism is substantially better imo.
I'm not a skilled proselytizer and don't want to sidetrack this thread with off-putting preaching, but I do think being in a faith community is very valuable and excellent for fighting the sort of troubles you seem to be having. But, it's only useful if you have faith or are open to it, so I won't harp on the point. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:58 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw it's not something i haven't thought myself. honestly wish i could bring myself, and my wife, to get involved with a church again. haven't been able to do it though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773310) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:08 AM Author: Amber thriller azn If the desire is there, I think it's worth pursuing. Is it just the "no faith" part holding you back, or something more specific, like the thought it would be ridiculous, too much work, etc.? If it's the former, and you're interested, you should begin with some spiritual searching rather than just trying to force-meme it by attending services.
I've never been a serious unbeliever myself, but I know that one poster became one in large part thanks to reading Kierkegaard. On the easier-to-read side of things, I appreciated Orthodoxy by Chesterton. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:41 AM Author: Amber thriller azn Exercise is 180. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773083) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:25 AM Author: Obsidian Stirring Macaca Patrolman stop drinking (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773029) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:27 AM Author: nighttime costumed mental disorder you are not alone brother, many have felt this and will in the future. feeling isolated leads to path of destruction. have you tried vocalizing this to someone irl ? wife ? best friend ? court ordered shrink? jk.
ever get a few days where you are not ON? can your wife give you a weekend? call it a daddy vacation? exercise, clean up, go for walk. take a lil something of whatever you got in medicine cabinet listen to a few albums or watch a few movies. call a few family members. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:39 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw thanks. my wife has chronic depression and anxiety. in our relationship, i've always been the upbeat, energetic person, the one who always sees the solutions and tells her to relax, everything is going to be OK. nothing has changed with her, but i'm having an increasingly harder time with my role.
i don't really have any friends. moved around too much. wife and kids are it. i have one good friend, but he lives across the country.
i've gone on business trips, and those are kind of refreshing, but mostly i just drink myself into oblivion.
i don't think it's burnout. i'm just slowly losing my ability to get excited about things. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:51 AM Author: nighttime costumed mental disorder the strains on you must be enormous than.
try not to let it effect the way you view your family, and if you find that it is, conscientiously fight it. it seems like it will inevitably begin to invade others spheres of life. you may have to white knuckle it until the kids are old enough that you can have some more free time to clear out the cobwebs. a regimented life, where you are damn near always giving more than receiving, is by definition taxing. maybe try and brainstorm some ways to introduce small moments of happiness into life....set up playlists w/ rejuvenating music and have hook up ready for car, get keruig to make morning ritual smoother, carry gum with you everywhere, get a nice time of jam to put on toast in the morning...im trying to brainstorm but these are all gay ill try again later lol....but since we cannot escape the regimented stress, we may find minor ways to make it more tolerable...depression may sap the will to make even small efforts that may go a long way |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:56 AM Author: honey-headed black woman ceo The world is a like those orc nests inLOTR. You think that thinking will be beneficial?
You awoke too early. Intelligence isn't destined To be more powerful for 1000 years. Go back to sleep. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 1:58 AM Author: 180 opaque heaven same (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773131) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:37 AM Author: out-of-control doctorate -no faith
-no friends
-wife is chronically depressed and anxious
-some job for means of making money, not a passion
-xo
big surprise. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:38 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773259) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:42 AM Author: nighttime costumed mental disorder fuck our assess
FOA |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:46 AM Author: Cobalt ungodly knife watch this with an open mind: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7d16CpWp-ok
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:53 AM Author: Cobalt ungodly knife after that, check out Isaiah 42 in the bible. This summarizes it nicely:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-WI8cPkyEg
The craziest thing about Isaiah 42 is that it mentions Sela (a mountain in Medina) as the location of the one who "will bring justice to the nations."
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:01 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw wait mustafa = chosen one in arabic? not lion king's dad?
all of this is total bullshit. equal "literal" proof exists for all variants of christianity. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:05 AM Author: Cobalt ungodly knife you're mistaking mufasa for Mustafa... but anyway, are you an atheist? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773327) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:53 AM Author: honey-headed black woman ceo Hoe to sign up (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773302) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 2:59 AM Author: out-of-control doctorate i got norm mcdonald interrupting conan guests as recommended in the side bar, so im watching that instead now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTPxJH7UNWw |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:01 AM Author: Mustard mind-boggling meetinghouse bbw (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773315) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:08 AM Author: out-of-control doctorate https://youtu.be/YTPxJH7UNWw?t=8m59s
best part. |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:18 AM Author: Cobalt ungodly knife https://youtu.be/YTPxJH7UNWw?t=589
b-o-r-e-d = win |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:20 AM Author: out-of-control doctorate conan almost lost his shit for a second there. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773342) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:29 AM Author: Cobalt ungodly knife Norm was right too about box office poison:
https://www.google.com/search?q=carrot+top+chairman+of+the+board&ie=&oe=
13% on RT
"It was poorly received by both critics and audiences and is regarded as one of the worst films ever made."
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:03 AM Author: razzle-dazzle hot filthpig It's called adulthood (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773319) |
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Date: November 26th, 2017 3:09 AM Author: Idiotic Principal's Office whoa, that link makes me want to kill myself. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34773333) |
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Date: December 16th, 2017 6:16 AM Author: Cyan location digit ratio (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3809137&forum_id=2#34933453) |
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Date: December 16th, 2017 6:17 AM Author: sooty private investor boistinker UNTIL YOU HAVE POSSESSED DYING AND REBIRTH YOU ARE BUT A GLOOMY GUEST ON THIS DREARY EARTH |