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wife wants to send 2 yr old to $26k Montessori school plus nanny
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:48 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry Had a huge fight - wife wants to send 2 yr old to preschool at $26k, but since the preschool is only for 3 hrs a day, we'd have to get a nanny at least part time to pick up the child and spend the afternoon with her - nanny will cost around $20k assuming we can even find one.
I told her that spending $50k a year on just childcare for a 2 yr old is insane.
Am i wrong? |
Date: June 15th, 2018 12:48 PM Author: bearded business firm State your income and net worth.
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:50 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry wife is working part time now, but if she goes back to full time work (which she says she will), joint income will be mid 400k to 500k
net worth is around 1 million, counting 401ks and shit, not counting retirement savings, around 600k |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:52 PM Author: bearded business firm You live in Big-City USA? Big-City Burbs? Mid city USA? Or ARE COUNTRTY? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251438) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:53 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry ny fucking c (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251452) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: bearded business firm Put up posters in brighton beach for Russian Nanny. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251470) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:34 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut So you're paying city tax on top of that and have no room for a live in au pair. You need to stop this nonsense and leave NYC, which you're going to do anyway when the kids are school age. Otherwise, you'll be wasting money on private school. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251743) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:16 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry I would LOVE to move to the burbs, but wife wants to stay in MFH (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252517) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:20 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut LMAO, I'm starting to see a pattern to your misery here, brother. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252537) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:14 PM Author: Fear-inspiring hell main people u need to fucking pump brakes on wife, breh. this has nothing to do with montessori or any of that other shit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252865) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:51 PM Author: Flatulent bright stage Seems like the Montessori school is a complete waste. Also, lol at paying like $30/hour for preschool. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251431) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:53 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry even if i were making $2 mil a year, I think I would still get pissed off at this just on principle.
this montessori has "Spanish immersion" and "Mandarin immersion" courses, for fucking 2 yr olds, but it's actually just an excuse for them to hiring spics and fobs who can't speak much English and pay them crap, while upselling their employment of FOBs to people with way too much money.
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:54 PM Author: bearded business firm By nature a montesorri school should be a cheap option. You must be in SF of MFH (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251460) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry MFH (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251475) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:52 PM Author: motley chocolate bbw forum Is this part of a plan to get the kid into a fancy private elementary school? If not, then there is NO reason to do this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251437) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:00 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry no, there is a church affiliates school that goes up to middle school that I personally love, and we'd probably send the kid there for elementary school. This fucking Montessori is not appropriate for anything above age 4.
but wife thinks that a 2 yr old can't handle 9-6 days at the church school.
the church school is still expensive (around 30k), but at least we wouldn't have to SEPARATELY hire fucking nanny. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:05 PM Author: bearded business firm Episcopalian or Cathloc? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251539) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:10 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry episcopalian (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251577) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:23 PM Author: bearded business firm CR (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251649) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:53 PM Author: Citrine trust fund I went to a Montessori school and got suspended in a week (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251447) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251471) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:57 PM Author: Clear crusty property sneaky criminal Bite the bullet. You’re shortsighted, montessori is feeder to which privates? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251478) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:59 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry i do NOT want my daughter to be raised with NYC brats who get fed to certain "private schools."
i've fucked enough damaged Manhattan rich girls to know better. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:01 PM Author: Clear crusty property sneaky criminal lol ok, you're obviously in denial. Bite the bullet and pray your references don’t learn about your waffling on whether to pay for a good education for your child. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251516) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 12:57 PM Author: Odious House-broken Set Is she a bad mother who can't be bothered to read to your child? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251483) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:00 PM Author: Boyish spot Montessori is such Lmao flame. We want to do whatever your kid wants man, no lesson plan, just immigrants with no education and chill (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251504) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:08 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe Montessori at 2...then a million spent on education 20 years later, she’s graduating from a self study major in basket weaving at Hamilton. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251564) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:22 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry are you going to send your kids to BASIS? That's actually my top choice - it's reasonably priced, and no bullshit liberal indoctrination. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252553) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:43 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe I’ve never heard of basis.
My kids are going to public school to elementary and either catholic middle and high school if we stay in the neighborhood or public school if we move to a better middle/hs district.
I don’t really care about liberal indoctrination at all. I was super liberal until college. Kids gotta figure these things out themselves and will likely rebel if you push any view too hard. I just stress personal responsibility. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:17 PM Author: Fear-inspiring hell main people cr.
we're in a position that going from K-12 in our district is a top 5 outcome in the whole state thankfully. I'm not worried about shitliberalism, but truth is what you said---push personal responsibility HARD. the rest will figure itself out even if they have an ubershitlib phase. no big deal. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:00 PM Author: vigorous half-breed heaven lol at kid havers (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251508) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:08 PM Author: Exciting cumskin that you currently have this problem implies that you have made a whole series of catastrophically poor life decisions and are highly likely to Bourdain yourself in your late fifties / early sixties (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251567) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:09 PM Author: Drab Dashing Resort Depressive Lol you’ve got quite a catch there. LJL. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251574) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:12 PM Author: Cowardly station deer antler JFC.
let's get to the real point: which of her friends has/had young kids in montessori schools + a nanny? |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:17 PM Author: Razzle-dazzle dingle berry neighbor across the hall.
i called her out on this and she flipped the fuck out. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:21 PM Author: Clear crusty property sneaky criminal Because that’s the norm where you are bro. Do you want your kid raised with heathens and poor people of color? If not, the time was six months ago to find the right feeder and start fluffing up your references. Your wife is right. Not saying it’s a good thing, but she’s right. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251638) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:28 PM Author: Cowardly station deer antler lmao. women are so predictable. everything is shaped by keeping up appearances with other women.
this has nothing to do with your kid; everything to do with your wife maintaining status with her acquaintances.
if it's really about your kid, take that $26k and invest it into a fund for his future use. because which do you think he will get more value from: 3 hrs a day of montessori school at age 2, or a $26k investment he can use later? |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 6:46 PM Author: adventurous fortuitous meteor legend lmao at spending $26K on PRESCHOOL yet living "across the hall" from someone (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253650) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 9:40 PM Author: Apoplectic menage marketing idea shower down the hall? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254319) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:13 PM Author: vermilion cruel-hearted school cafeteria digit ratio montessori is $26k/yr at 3 hours a day?? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251601) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:29 PM Author: impertinent yarmulke Is your wife black? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251703) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:30 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Your HHI is similar to ours (assuming your wife goes back to work) and this sounds totally insane to me. Our plan is a live-in au pair and call it good until they're old enough to go to pre-K. Full stop. The concept of nanny + some nonsense for 3 hours a day at $50k/year seems completely retarded.
As an aside, people giving me shit over my car should note that a few wrong moves on this shit quickly costs far more than my super-luxury car. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:36 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe There is value to socialization and learning to take directions, sharing etc in a group setting before age 5. You could do part time normal preschool for that. Around age 3 is when they start needing more of a group setting to learn that stuff. Given your kid’s parents, you want to stick em out there earlier so they don’t turn out to be complete social weirdos. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251756) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:38 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut This can't happen without spending $26k/year on some BS Montessori?
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:56 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe $26k for part time preschool sounds really expensive.
You can get full time for $20k. An au pair costs about $20k/year and they live with you so I’d prob just do full time preschool around age 3-4. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:58 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut idk man, I suspect we're going to do Au Pair + play dates until 4, then do Pre-K. Full time at 3 seems a little much and might result in them being one of those horrible hyper-social American kids. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251943) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:00 PM Author: Boyish spot So Mandy won't work (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252446) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:06 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Explain. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252469) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:39 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe So your au pair’s going to drive your kids to play dates during the week in your AMG suv? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252629) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:41 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut No, we're keeping the old Jeep Grand Cherokee as a second car. I'm not a retard. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252631) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:46 PM Author: carmine factory reset button what will Mandy drive? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253055) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:50 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut They'll have to trade the Jeep off. I don't think either will need the car every day. Mandy will Uber it some days to work. I WFH most days too. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253076) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:53 PM Author: carmine factory reset button that's cool. I thought you were going to say she still refuses to get a license and I was going to make fun of you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253090) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:56 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut No, she has realized that this is unworkable. She is currently taking an uber every single day to work and sometimes from work (when I can't pick her up). The plan is though that at the end of this year we get my car, she gets her license in the interim and she gets the Jeep. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253112) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:42 PM Author: multi-colored corner just lol at there being normal preschools in west LA. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36251812) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 1:52 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe The preschool we picked is $20k for full time and about as normal as you can get. No educational philosophies and just a big playground.
It’s pricey compared ARE country but that’s due to COL.
About 75% of our friend group does a Montessori or Waldorf school. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:51 PM Author: carmine factory reset button lol you don't live in america (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253083) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 2:59 PM Author: Boyish spot Your live in Au pair isn't going to work 100 hour weeks brother. You either want a slave or a nanny.(or really, no baby is what you actually want). There are other rules on having an au pair that your ratty little house won't satisfy anyway |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:07 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut "There are other rules on having an au pair that your ratty little house won't satisfy anyway"
Such as? |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:50 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe You’re supposed talk to them and include them in meals and shit. I can’t see you and Mandy being welcoming to somebody like that.
It’s primarily a language and cultural program, not a program for you to take advantage of cheap childcare. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:58 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Wtf, we fully intend to do that. They're going to be someone from Ukraine or Russia and since we speak the language this should work out really well. New place is also in a great location for someone (easy access to NYC) and they'll have a really nice living space.
Also, because we're all from the same background, we get a bunch of ethnic food anyway so we would be happy to make sure they can have whatever food they want.
I don't know why you think I'm going to be an asshole to them. Also, while we'll ask them to look after the kids more than some, we'll also give them a bunch of nice stuff as extras (macbook pro, nice phone, etc.).
I'll tell you a story that might make you understand a bit better. There's a program where people from all over the world get summer jobs in hospitality. Some poor Russian girl got screwed over on accommodation, barely spoke English. My parents took her in on the spot and she is living with them now for free as they get it sorted out. We're not Are Reptile. |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:04 PM Author: stimulating bisexual hall The only thing I would be wary about is leaving a three month old with someone has little experience with a kid that age (especially if it’s a colicky kid). I imagine you can try to screen for people who have experience with newborns. Looks like you are also limited to 10 hours/day, 45 hours a week, so you’ll want backup options too. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252788) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:13 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Yeah, we can work things out with her in a mutually beneficial manner. It might involve extra money/stuff or more vacation time or whatever. I'm sure we'll find a backup babysitter too plus there may be times when family actually helps (and we can give her that time as paid vacation to compensate for when she works more). Look man, if there's anything I appreciate about Ukrainians and Russians, it is that we're a pragmatic people and anything can be negotiated/arranged. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252853) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:24 PM Author: iridescent concupiscible giraffe Lol can’t wait for you guys to have kids.
Two anti social russians think they’re going to be engaging hosts making fresh pierogies for a Ukrainian peasant who dutifully shuttles around the kids to play dates.
Fast forward 3 years and fish and Mandy are barely talking to each other, eating dominos take out with 2 screaming rugrats and Natalia has just crashed the Jeep because she was taking selfies while driving.
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:29 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut I'm sure both visions will be realities at various points. That's just life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252960) |
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Date: June 16th, 2018 1:01 AM Author: Boyish spot Lmao. Anyway fish they work Max 45 hours a week. If you're talking full time care one won't cut it.
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:04 PM Author: turquoise misunderstood idiot round eye LOL
You weird manhattan dandies are endless entertainment |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:39 PM Author: Disrespectful floppy patrolman You're not wrong. 3hrs of daycare at 20+K/yr is fucking stupid. ATD
Tell your wife once she goes back to working you'll revisit the issue. But holy shit at day care + nanny at 50K/yr while youre wife IS AT HOME
Get your kid a 2K/mo nanny who only speaks Mandarin or Arabic and when your wife complains tell her they're learning more marketable skills than in fucking duplo block faux montessori |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:44 PM Author: Comical Rebellious Mediation Garrison we did this for our son (also Montessori, also 9-12, also $26k) when he was 3/4
he’s off to public K in the fall. probably should have put him in public pre-K this year but whatever |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 3:59 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut So you did Montessori instead of public pre-K? Why? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252740) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:13 PM Author: Comical Rebellious Mediation Garrison kid was happy and was always a chance we wouldn’t have gotten into local pre-k as spaces are v limited (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252857) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:14 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Don't you try to get a spot and just stick with the Montessori if it doesn't work out? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252863) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:14 PM Author: Comical Rebellious Mediation Garrison what’s it to you? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252868) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:16 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut As a guy in planning mode for kids, this shit is interesting to me. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252880) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:18 PM Author: stimulating bisexual hall Kids struggle with change. People on the spectrum struggle with change. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252895) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 4:20 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut True, true. Ergo, why I'm overplanning massively. Normal people just have kids and then figure things out as they go along. Instead, we're getting everything just right, planning for as many variations as possible and going from there. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36252908) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 7:00 PM Author: Splenetic obsidian pit puppy is mandy even pregnant, or are these all just paper daydreams? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36253714) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 9:37 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut We have frozen embryos and are hiring a surrogate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254312) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 9:45 PM Author: tan friendly grandma a pitbull? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254335) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 11:24 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Close, an E Euro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254681) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 9:46 PM Author: Self-absorbed up-to-no-good affirmative action circlehead BEEP BEEP BEEP (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254338) |
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Date: June 15th, 2018 11:23 PM Author: histrionic juggernaut Duh (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4002794&forum_id=2#36254678) |