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How do you deal with deep regrets, personally?
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Date: May 28th, 2022 3:56 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base Job sucks, relationships suck, poetry and other hobbies suck, not sure what I've done right. Yet it's self-worsening, I should be striving to get better but don't want to get out of bed regularly. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588481) |
Date: May 28th, 2022 3:57 AM Author: Nudist Galvanic Organic Girlfriend alcohol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588482) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 3:58 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base Got that covered (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588487) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 9:51 PM Author: seedy flatulent casino scourge upon the earth We should meet up in the city sometime. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44591707) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 3:57 AM Author: Contagious Theater Stage Acceptance or change; that is, movement within or without. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588486) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 3:58 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base How does motivation within tend to start? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588489) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:01 AM Author: Contagious Theater Stage Movements of the heart are hard to describe from within a given frame, since they involve a phase transition from one stable state to another -- you are becoming the Other, something to you now incomprehensible. How can you describe being grown to a child?
If suffering is borne of the nagging voice you should be striving, then just stop striving. But if the pricks persist, stop kicking against the pricks.
There will always be signs small and, if those are ignored, increasingly large of what path you should be following.
If routines are stale, shake things up, increase activity level.
If there is some persistent pattern that's broken in your life script, elucidate the elements and then create a process-based, realistic, adaptive plan to change it.
Through it all, be as kind to yourself as you are to others. |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:10 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base Interesting, ty for the lengthy reply. Penultimate paragraph seems cr, although it's going to take some thought what those patterns are. I don't particularly want to strive, never minded being poor (and have never not been xo poor as an adult), but maybe feel more of a crisis of meaning? Idk. Were you a psych major or does it come up a lot in your work? You seem pretty knowledgable. |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 3:59 AM Author: Contagious Theater Stage Let me ask: what is your deep regret? It sounds like you're just describing the base reality that existence is unsatisfactory -- suffering. "What then, Plato's ghost," etc. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588490) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:03 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base Perhaps failure to launch? When I was younger and more vital, I had a lot of ideas of what I wanted to do, creative projects etc. I'm not truly old but at that point where you feel the lack of energy, and I never really made anything materialize. I hoped I'd have the important things (job, spouse, location, etc.) figured out by 30, but I must've fucked up somewhere, because none of it is. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588500) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:05 AM Author: Contagious Theater Stage Ah, I see. What are you looking for in a spouse? What are you doing to find one?
You're at a good age to snap up a lady -- pick of the leftovers. Could have family sorted in a year or two with application.
As to career, you're more likely to get that sorted if you first figure out your future family situation. Else, what motivation? |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:18 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base I'm in a pretty dead-end career, why do you think family life is the better preliminary? (Serious q.) I have romantic designs that seem realistic, but they're on a stupidly lomg timeline. I don't feel very motivated in the academy and got somewhat ruined by people I thought were insincere getting ahead when I couldn't get anywhere (ITE didn't help). Started getting into more abstract things like poetry and hobbyist coding (I can't do real production-level work currently, I learned the hard way.) I'd just like to start getting some blocks settled to figure out what I'm doing, but I'm not even sure to start. Doesn't help that my dearest irl friends moved away and I'm not close to any family. |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:23 AM Author: up-to-no-good mind-boggling public bath patrolman Try regular exercise, meditation, reading good practical western philosophy (eg stoicism), journaling, honest introspection (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588533) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:35 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base I have read my fair share of Seneca and Epictetus, used to work out a lot and should get back to it, ty. Journaling is interesting, what does that tend to do for you? I've never done it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588543) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:51 AM Author: up-to-no-good mind-boggling public bath patrolman Try some modern stoic stuff too (William Irvine is decent)
Re: journaling, putting your thoughts down in some sort of objective form is really important. Dealing with life's problems requires the organization of writing and requires creating some sort of material you can refer to later. Also doing some specifically private writing is important because you'll be more honest with yourself in certain ways than you will be with any sort of audience, even if pumo
People will use a spreadsheet for basic household budgeting but then try to figure out their life problems in their head without regularly writing about it. A bit silly |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:09 AM Author: Mentally Impaired Weed Whacker We're similar in a lot of ways. I've also been down this path; when I was younger, I had tons of ideas and many differing interests, but they all led me to shitlaw. I lucked out and, at 35, met someone who was truly the most incredible person I have ever met. We will be engaged at the end of this summer. There's always time to maek it man. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588578) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:03 AM Author: adventurous pale wrinkle hominid philosophy, weed, and tethering yourself to the most valuable wealth- family. Regrets are undiscovered lessons. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588501) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:06 AM Author: Vigorous apoplectic resort just realize life is pointless, billions of humans have come before us they all died and no one remembers their deep thoughts and sadness, its all a pile of shit, actually not even shit cause shit has some tangible presence, our thoughts have no presence at all once we are gone, the second we die they are all gone, just wait for death its the only salvation from this gay rapist world (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588505) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:12 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base While i agree with the four noble truths, this seems like awful advice, man. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588515) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:20 AM Author: Vigorous apoplectic resort stfu birdshit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588530) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:24 AM Author: up-to-no-good mind-boggling public bath patrolman There's no inherent purpose in life but that doesn't mean that there isn't a purpose. It means that you have to define your own, which is actually an enormous responsibility most people fail at badly (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588534) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:10 AM Author: deep titillating whorehouse (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588512) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:12 AM Author: Adulterous Queen Of The Night (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588514) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:14 AM Author: Razzle-dazzle Multi-billionaire comparing myself to less fortunate people (lawyers and heterosexuals) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588519) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:21 AM Author: Painfully honest fear-inspiring meetinghouse goal in life Poorly. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588531) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:44 AM Author: Adulterous Queen Of The Night Don't be too hard on yourself or too easy on yourself, but rather find the balance between the two, like a sympathetic friend would. (Good will towards God, our neighbor, and ourself.) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588550) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:51 AM Author: Submissive White Background Story You can't say the poetry sucks without having someone take a look at it (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588559) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 4:57 AM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base Only poem I actually like is being reviewed so I don't want to get outted, most are not great. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588567) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:16 AM Author: Submissive White Background Story (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588581) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:03 AM Author: Adulterous Queen Of The Night Also, learning to laugh at myself and my folly over the years has really helped.
It's very liberating to learn - not just as abstract knowledge, but to live it through firsthand experience - that so much of the "weight of the world" we might feel from time to time: it's mostly self-imposed.
(The weight of the world being on God's shoulders is one of those statements that's easy to gloss over, but it's actually very heartwarming when considered seriously.) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 8:59 PM Author: Rough-skinned Fluffy Half-breed 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44591482) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:12 AM Author: maroon national security agency Going to be hard in your situation. I have played the long game in life and while it has been stressful it has been incredibly rewarding.
The easiest route post college would have been law school but I knew I would have hated it. I was mocked on here mercilessly for being poor while I figured my life out in my 20s and now I am richer than anyone on here and in a profession I can gladly work in easily through my 70s, whereas 99% of the lawyers on here are totally burnt out by their 30s-40s and now just treading water at best. |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 9:18 PM Author: nubile becky cruise ship No doobs but what’s this magical profession? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44591575) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:54 AM Author: Bipolar orchid mad cow disease Action is the only thing that will solve anything. You will never mentally fix anything. As soon as you realize that life is meant to be lived and all this endless mental masturbation is total flame your life will improve dramatically. Do things in the real world. Have a full day. Do something active. Work. Get your personal shit done. Go to the bar and get drunk and talk to someone new. That’s a nice day (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588594) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 5:55 AM Author: maroon national security agency (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588595) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 6:35 AM Author: at-the-ready travel guidebook brunch you dont. time heals some wounds and others will always be there. you just keep going anyway. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44588612) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 6:44 PM Author: tripping hospital deer antler Dont see what your deep regrets are. What do you wish you had done differently given what you know now? Just seems like things havent worked out (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44590918) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 6:57 PM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base One concrete example is that when I was young I consciously chose not to care about wealth (and I wonder whether disgust at xo's patrick bateman mentality was a slight motivation), but it mattered more for stability than I thought. I'd chopse differently on that ground alone if I could go back somehow. You are right that a lot of it is taking a chance and things not working out, but there are other regrets. Can immediately think of three women I probably could've married before 25, and I burned all those bridges honestly because I didn't value them enough as people. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44590962) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 8:40 PM Author: tripping hospital deer antler What career path would you have chosen?
You thought youd eventually meet someone better than those 3 chicks? |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 8:46 PM Author: blathering metal skinny woman base I had a decent freshman (so to speak) tech resume for the time and thought about law, either would've probably been better. It wasn't really that I thought I'd meet better, it was more that I wasn't even thinking about long-term. One had her... issues (suicidal Chinese national), but even she was loyal and really loved me. Other two were great. The problem was entirely me not thinking about what kind of life I would actually want when I aged out of going out culture and would just want a comfy and quiet life. |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 9:36 PM Author: tripping hospital deer antler whyd you pass up tech and law for academics? you were that interested in scholarship?
if you knew you werent gonna meet someone better, you'd have locked up one of those chicks while still living this academic life? |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 6:48 PM Author: Rough-skinned Fluffy Half-breed Its god calling you towards him. the very fact that you have regrets is a good sign for your salvation. its also penitence for the sins of our fathers. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44590930) |
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Date: May 28th, 2022 8:57 PM Author: maroon national security agency (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5118725&forum_id=2#44591476) |