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Disney Is Abandoning DEI - Here Are 10 Based Changes They're Maeking!

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-is-abandoning-dei---here-...
Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask
  02/19/25
180
ultramarine fantasy-prone stead rigpig
  02/19/25
...
Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask
  02/19/25
...
Buck-toothed Locus
  02/19/25
Is Elon Musk The Father Of Your Child? Signs To Look For ...
infuriating step-uncle's house
  02/19/25
JFC this is unfunny. I guess the backup “comedy&rd...
Maize locale
  02/19/25
most partisan political humor is stupid as shit and unfunny ...
Mauve internet-worthy den dragon
  02/19/25
...
Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask
  02/26/25


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Date: February 19th, 2025 6:58 AM
Author: Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-is-abandoning-dei---here-are-10-based-changes-theyre-making

Disney announced last week they would be discontinuing their Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion hiring practices, a giant move away from the direction the company has been heading for quite some time now.

In the wake of this announcement, here are 10 totally based changes coming to Disney this year:

Mickey and Minnie will be forced to finally marry and stop living in sin. They've been dating over 100 years. It's about time.

Racism will be added back into the Splash Mountain ride: Nature is healing.

Donald Duck will be required to wear pants. His days of corrupting the youth are over.

The new Snow White movie will replace Rachel Zegler with conservative superstar James Woods. An actor of his range and caliber could totally pull it off.

Pocahontas will get a job as a greeter at the casino. And on the weekends she sings "Just Around The River Bend" in the casino lounge.

Old classic cartoon "Mickey Joins The Luftwaffe" will return to Disney+: A long-forgotten masterpiece, now available on streaming.

All the animatronic presidents at Disneyland will now be programmed to do the Trump Dance. This is both a fun and terrifying change and we're here for it.

The entire Peter Pan movie will now just be them singing "What Makes The Red Man Red": That will be both fun and entertaining to watch.

Pride Rock will get bulldozed for a big, beautiful oil well. Drill, baby, drill.

The movies will be good again: Haha, just kidding. Probably not.

What's your favorite change? Let us know in the comments!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673691)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 7:00 AM
Author: ultramarine fantasy-prone stead rigpig

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673694)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 7:04 AM
Author: Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673700)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:43 AM
Author: Buck-toothed Locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48674451)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 7:40 AM
Author: infuriating step-uncle's house

Is Elon Musk The Father Of Your Child? Signs To Look For

https://babylonbee.com/news/is-elon-musk-actually-the-father-of-your-child-10-signs-to-look-for

His first words were "heliocentric orbit": Adorable!

He waves "bye-bye" with his arm rigidly extended at an upward 45-degree angle: At least he claims he's just saying "bye-bye."

Loves boobies: And not just when he's hungry.

He beat Diablo IV at the age of 3: It seemed like it was so easy for him.

He fired half the staff at his daycare: The bloated daycare is now running with unprecedented efficiency.

He somehow managed to launch his Cozy Coupe into orbit: NASA has now subcontracted its missions to him.

He troubleshooted your wifi router problem before his first birthday: And this was after he founded multiple companies.

Posts on X when he should be napping: You may need to take his Fisher-Price Chatter Phone away.

Complains about the "woke mind viwus" in Baby Einstein: Waaaaah!!!

Your child is a human born in the last 30 years or so: Sorry - odds are, it's Elon's.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673751)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:40 AM
Author: Maize locale

JFC this is unfunny.

I guess the backup “comedy” writers got called since Ashley St. Clair had her legs full.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48674423)



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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:41 AM
Author: Mauve internet-worthy den dragon

most partisan political humor is stupid as shit and unfunny because it's written by some MAF polisci nerd.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48674438)



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Date: February 26th, 2025 8:32 PM
Author: Concupiscible Hall Pocket Flask



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48697248)