Seinfeld episode about the disappearance of Gabby Petito
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Date: September 21st, 2021 10:04 AM Author: deranged comical mood
JERRY: They lived in a van.
KRAMER: Who?
JERRY: Petito and her boyfriend.
KRAMER: Petito? I thought they found her in the laundry.
JERRY: No, you idiot, his name is Brian Laundrie.
KRAMER: The girl?
JERRY: The boyfriend!
[laughter]
GEORGE: I think van life is underrated. No rent, freedom to move around. I'd probably like it.
NEWMAN: I lived in a van once.
[laughter]
JERRY: You did not live in a van, Newman.
NEWMAN: It was before I became a United States postal worker.
[laughter]
GEORGE: You know, I'd probably kill Susan if we were stuck in a van for weeks on end. Especially in the desert, with all that dry air.
NEWMAN: Yes, yes you would.
[laughter]
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4926480&forum_id=2#43151548) |
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Date: September 21st, 2021 9:53 PM Author: deranged comical mood
ELAINE: You bought a van?
DAVID: It's an all-terrain recreational vehicle.
ELAINE: I'm not riding in that thing to Utah, David!
DAVID: It's Wyoming.
ELAINE: Wyoming?
DAVID: Yeah, that's right.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4926480&forum_id=2#43156073) |
Date: September 22nd, 2021 11:04 AM Author: Laughsome narrow-minded legend
[The gang watching the news on TV]
JERRY: It's not, it can't be!
GEORGE: It is! I'd recognize it anywhere! That's the van fragile Frankie Merman gave you!
JERRY: You're right, I think it is! What are the odds?
GEORGE: Jesus, I hope they got a good deal. That van has seen a lot.
JERRY: Seems like it might have seen a whole lot more lately...
KRAMER: [visibly shaken] That van is cursed! And I used it, and I was almost disappeared by the postmaster general...
JERRY: You what?
[Newman eyes Kramer ominously]
KRAMER: Oh, uh, n-nothing... The United States Postal Service is a fine organization.
[News Anchor begins speaking]
ANCHOR: Gabby Pepito's father, Joe Pepito, said there were signs for discord between the couple before they left Florida.
MR. PEPTIO: Brian was obsessed with that van. He kept saying it belonged to some famous comedian. Gabby had her doubts about it, and it would drive Brian crazy.
ANCHOR: An old title was found in the van, revealing it formerly belonged to a "GERRI SEINFELD", spelled G-E-R-R-I. Police are now speculating that a fight between Gabby and Brian over whether this was a misspelling of obscure mid-tier comedian "JERRY SEINFELD", spelled J-E-R-R-Y, may have been the cause of the fight that led to Gabby's demise.
[Gang looks at Jerry in shock]
JERRY: Obscure!? Mid-tier!?
KRAMER: Hey, this might just be the big break you need buddy!
JERRY: What?! You think owning the van involved in a high profile murder is going to boost my career! I'm going to be typecast forever now! I'm going to be the van guy! I don't want to be the van guy! And in any event, my career is doing fine anyway...
[Gang simultaneously leans back and avoids eye contact with Jerry]
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4926480&forum_id=2#43158355) |
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