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Disney Is Abandoning DEI - Here Are 10 Based Changes They're Maeking!
| Startled Sandwich Turdskin | 02/19/25 |
| Self-absorbed crusty gas station philosopher-king | 02/19/25 |
| Startled Sandwich Turdskin | 02/19/25 |
| fuchsia market pocket flask | 02/19/25 |
| Disgusting School Cafeteria | 02/19/25 |
| cracking rusted cruise ship | 02/19/25 |
| Marvelous french chef main people | 02/19/25 |
| Startled Sandwich Turdskin | 02/26/25 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: February 19th, 2025 6:58 AM Author: Startled Sandwich Turdskin https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-is-abandoning-dei---here-are-10-based-changes-theyre-making
Disney announced last week they would be discontinuing their Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion hiring practices, a giant move away from the direction the company has been heading for quite some time now.
In the wake of this announcement, here are 10 totally based changes coming to Disney this year:
Mickey and Minnie will be forced to finally marry and stop living in sin. They've been dating over 100 years. It's about time.
Racism will be added back into the Splash Mountain ride: Nature is healing.
Donald Duck will be required to wear pants. His days of corrupting the youth are over.
The new Snow White movie will replace Rachel Zegler with conservative superstar James Woods. An actor of his range and caliber could totally pull it off.
Pocahontas will get a job as a greeter at the casino. And on the weekends she sings "Just Around The River Bend" in the casino lounge.
Old classic cartoon "Mickey Joins The Luftwaffe" will return to Disney+: A long-forgotten masterpiece, now available on streaming.
All the animatronic presidents at Disneyland will now be programmed to do the Trump Dance. This is both a fun and terrifying change and we're here for it.
The entire Peter Pan movie will now just be them singing "What Makes The Red Man Red": That will be both fun and entertaining to watch.
Pride Rock will get bulldozed for a big, beautiful oil well. Drill, baby, drill.
The movies will be good again: Haha, just kidding. Probably not.
What's your favorite change? Let us know in the comments! |
Date: February 19th, 2025 7:00 AM Author: Self-absorbed crusty gas station philosopher-king 180 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673694) |
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Date: February 19th, 2025 7:04 AM Author: Startled Sandwich Turdskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48673700) |
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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:43 AM Author: fuchsia market pocket flask (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48674451) |
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Date: February 19th, 2025 7:40 AM Author: Disgusting School Cafeteria Is Elon Musk The Father Of Your Child? Signs To Look For
https://babylonbee.com/news/is-elon-musk-actually-the-father-of-your-child-10-signs-to-look-for
His first words were "heliocentric orbit": Adorable!
He waves "bye-bye" with his arm rigidly extended at an upward 45-degree angle: At least he claims he's just saying "bye-bye."
Loves boobies: And not just when he's hungry.
He beat Diablo IV at the age of 3: It seemed like it was so easy for him.
He fired half the staff at his daycare: The bloated daycare is now running with unprecedented efficiency.
He somehow managed to launch his Cozy Coupe into orbit: NASA has now subcontracted its missions to him.
He troubleshooted your wifi router problem before his first birthday: And this was after he founded multiple companies.
Posts on X when he should be napping: You may need to take his Fisher-Price Chatter Phone away.
Complains about the "woke mind viwus" in Baby Einstein: Waaaaah!!!
Your child is a human born in the last 30 years or so: Sorry - odds are, it's Elon's.
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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:40 AM Author: cracking rusted cruise ship JFC this is unfunny.
I guess the backup “comedy” writers got called since Ashley St. Clair had her legs full. |
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Date: February 19th, 2025 11:41 AM Author: Marvelous french chef main people most partisan political humor is stupid as shit and unfunny because it's written by some MAF polisci nerd. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48674438) |
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Date: February 26th, 2025 8:32 PM Author: Startled Sandwich Turdskin (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5682792&forum_id=2#48697248) |