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Dating apps and a drastically changing relationship landscape
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:12 AM Author: misunderstood nowag https://www.psychologytoday.com/ie/blog/the-state-our-unions/202208/the-rise-lonely-single-men
The Rise of Lonely, Single Men Dating apps and a drastically changing relationship landscape. Posted August 9, 2022 | Reviewed by Hara Estroff Marano
Share on FacebookShare Share on TwitterTweet Share via EmailEmail KEY POINTS Dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as relationship standards rise. Men represent approximately 62% of dating app users, lowering their chances for matches. Men need to address skills deficits to meet healthier relationship expectations. Nathan Cowley/Pexels Source: Nathan Cowley/Pexels Younger and middle-aged men are the loneliest they’ve ever been in generations, and it’s probably going to get worse.
This is not my typical rosy view of relationships but a reality nonetheless. Over the last 30 years, men have become a larger portion of that growing group of long-term single people. And while you don’t actually need to be in a relationship to be happy, men typically are happier and healthier when partnered.
Here are three broad trends in the relationship landscape that suggest heterosexual men are in for a rough road ahead:
Dating Apps. Whether you’re just starting to date or you’re recently divorced and dating again, dating apps are a huge driver of new romantic connections in the United States. The only problem is that upwards of 62% of users are men and many women are overwhelmed with how many options they have. Competition in online dating is fierce, and lucky in-person chance encounters with dreamy partners are rarer than ever.
Relationship Standards. With so many options, it’s not surprising that women are increasingly selective. I do a live TikTok show (@abetterloveproject) and speak with hundreds of audience members every week; I hear recurring dating themes from women between the ages of 25 and 45: They prefer men who are emotionally available, good communicators, and share similar values.
Skills Deficits. For men, this means a relationship skills gap that, if not addressed, will likely lead to fewer dating opportunities, less patience for poor communication skills, and longer periods of being single. The problem for men is that emotional connection is the lifeblood of healthy, long-term love. Emotional connection requires all the skills that families are still not consistently teaching their young boys.
While there’s probably no chance of stemming the rising tide of unintentional single men, there is still good news.
The algorithms are becoming increasingly more complex on dating apps and other online platforms. One benefit is that great matches are on the rise. Hinge, one dating app, found through beta trials that 90% of users rated their first date positively, with 72% indicating wanting a second date.
How can men reap the benefit of the algorithms? Level up your mental health game. That means getting into some individual therapy to address your skills gap. It means valuing your own internal world and respecting your ideas enough to communicate them effectively. It means seeing intimacy, romance, and emotional connection as worthy of your time and effort.
Ultimately, we have an opportunity to revolutionize romantic relationships and establish new healthy norms starting with a first date. It’s likely that some of these romances will be transformative and healing, disrupting generational trauma, and establishing a fresh culture of admiration and validation.
Men have a key role in this transformation but only if they go all-in. It’s going to take that kind of commitment to themselves, to their own mental health, to the kind of love they want to generate in this world. Will we step up? |
Date: August 12th, 2022 11:13 AM Author: racy mint giraffe den shouldnt there be an equal proportion of single women? unless... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003838) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:14 AM Author: Ruby yapping meetinghouse rigpig lmfao jesus christ i started copying and pasting individual sentences to make fun of, but by the time i got to the end of the article i would have had to copy paste the whole thing
yeah buddy, if only regular men were more "emotionally available" (what?) they would start being more successful on dating apps when compared to chad |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:15 AM Author: racy mint giraffe den Level up your mental health game. That means getting into some individual therapy to address your skills gap. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003849) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:25 PM Author: Alcoholic affirmative action "Becky, he's been getting some individual therapy to address his skills gap. How hot is that?" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004838) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 5:21 PM Author: Overrated Library (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005660) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 3:57 AM Author: passionate chapel the therapist would almost certainly be a Jew or a woman or both, and they would just feed you the same bullshit that hasn’t been working for three decades (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007870) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:15 AM Author: free-loading marketing idea roommate You don't understand- there are skills deficits here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003850) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:16 AM Author: racy mint giraffe den took an Udemy class on how to be more emotionally vulnerable, now my Tinder inbox is always full (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003858) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:24 AM Author: misunderstood nowag she's not into him because he's chad, ok? it's because he's emotionally available and took the time to work on himself. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003910) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:32 AM Author: Concupiscible Chartreuse Alpha Range They suggest THERAPY (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003949) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:33 AM Author: dashing office many girls these day say they want guys in therapy on their app profiles, ljl (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003951) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:27 PM Author: Bearded fear-inspiring trump supporter I was stunned at that one
How can men reap the benefit of the algorithms? Level up your mental health game. That means getting into some individual therapy to address your skills gap. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:15 AM Author: free-loading marketing idea roommate LOL that this article can be written without addressing the obvious question of How are fewer men dating than women (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003846) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:21 PM Author: lemon 180 forum pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004818) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 7:27 PM Author: ruddy stimulating partner garrison (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013876) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:15 AM Author: Excitant Domesticated Plaza sounds like a recipe for a healthy sustainable society (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003847) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:31 AM Author: Floppy whorehouse Whenever I read something unspeakably dumb it always seems to come from Psychology Today. What’s up with that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003946) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:34 AM Author: alcoholic kitchen Psychology Today said that smart people drink more, which made me feel good back when I drank a lot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003960) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:48 AM Author: Floppy whorehouse wtf I love Psychology Today (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004010) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:28 PM Author: Vibrant cream jewess PsyPost is where it's at:
https://www.psypost.org/2017/06/straight-mens-physiological-stress-response-seeing-two-men-kissing-seeing-maggots-49217 |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:35 AM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead lol I'm sure no woman mentioned her preference for height.
There's a numerical mismatch and an overwhelming preference for height. Shortmos are DONE HERE it's time to whoremonger. No amount of "working on yourself" or "skills" will make you taller. You cannot buy a woman's love but you can rent her affection, enjoy. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:49 AM Author: drab blathering macaca (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004015) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:37 AM Author: big claret gas station son of senegal some chick posted this on social media and laughed gleefully at the premise that men are lonely, the underlying message being that she thought they deserve it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003972) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:42 AM Author: racy mint giraffe den sounds like she's happy being Chad's Tuesday nightcap (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003987) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:43 AM Author: big claret gas station son of senegal she's a feminist. she hates men. as are/do many modern women (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45003993) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:55 AM Author: misunderstood nowag perfectly healthy, perfectly normal society (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004038) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:00 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den this should end well for them (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004067) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:26 PM Author: Iridescent roast beef menage Nothing ends well for anyone. That’s the point of all this nihilism. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004175) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 5:23 PM Author: Overrated Library (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005670) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 1:51 AM Author: Misanthropic Appetizing Crackhouse To be fair,
Except for Jews. This never even ends for them -- it just keeps going on, wonderfully, forever.
Or so all of the pumos (none of whom are Jewish and all of whom are way smarter, hotter, taller, funnier, richer, pretty much whatever they want more than me) keep telling me again and again! |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 3:59 AM Author: passionate chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007876) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:04 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead Then she's definitely happy being Chad's Tuesday nightcap.
"I'm just using him for his body, the same way men have used women for centuries," she muses as she rides him reverse cowgirl |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:31 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den *5 years later*
"These fuckbois need to GROW UP and settle down with women their own age!" |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:36 PM Author: dashing office soyboy white knight redditors also gleefully point out that no man is entitled a relationship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004227) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 11:58 AM Author: red electric furnace turdskin lol @ the proposed solution: just get therapy! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004052) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:00 PM Author: Rusted chest-beating principal's office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004066) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:06 PM Author: impressive poppy address yarmulke How dim witted can one be to write something like this and not see the other side of the coin. Life is misery for 50% of the population but bliss for all the women? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004090) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:09 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead This is pretty accurate and if you don't believe it make a fake tinder account as a chick. You'll have 500 guys chasing you before you can finish a profile. They have the incredible privilege of just waiting for men to compete for them, then decide which are worth their time to reciprocate. If they don't like the current crop, then they can put away the phone and come back in two days; 500 more men will be in the candidate pool. The only women on tinder for any length of time are either not looking to settle down at all or those that are insanely picky and have a list of requirements a dozen pages long.
The same technological revolution that made love easy for women has made it extremely challenging for men. Any time you're attracted to a woman, you're joining a candidate pool hundreds deep. Are you going to be better than all of them? Probably not.
Technology, a global imbalance between the number of men and women, and weakened expectations of monogamy have been a gift for women and a curse for men. Any analysis of dating that doesn't recognize that dynamic is woefully incomplete at best. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:39 PM Author: Exhilarant stead mad-dog skullcap A lot of women are just out of the game entirely though. The gender imbalance on the apps points to that. I see it with my wife's friends. These are decent girls who became 40+ shrews because they just couldn't lock down a dude who was ready to marry and start a family. It's really sad for them too. Is it the dating app or is something else driving the results on the dating app? I tend to think it's shrinking opportunities for young men to achieve economic and emotional stability. A lot of girls out there have to make a decision between dating down the socio-economic ladder or just going it alone. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004246) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:45 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead They voted for this in the most literal sense, they could have locked down a dude who was ready to marry and started a family. I guarantee you that ugly men who wanted to be fathers were beating down her door, she spurned them in favor of one night stands with chad. That's her prerogative, but now both she and the man she would have paired off with are going to be childless and probably unmarried forever.
That might indeed mean dating down the socio-economic ladder but bfd, men do this all the time. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:31 PM Author: Concupiscible Chartreuse Alpha Range (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004501) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:43 PM Author: Exhilarant stead mad-dog skullcap "That might indeed mean dating down the socio-economic ladder but bfd, men do this all the time."
It matters a lot because the expectation ingrained in people, especially women, is that they will be able to give their children a life that's equal to or better than what they grew up with. Girls don't want to invest in a long-term relationship that, at best, will send them straight down the socio-economic totem pole. This is true everywhere. You even saw it in Japan well before the advent of dating apps. When opportunities for young men to climb and grow go down, then dating, sex, and birth rates go down.
It's a challenge for mature first-world economies. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:51 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford How many decent guys want to settle down and get married in their 20s? Men are responsible for pumping and dumping too. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004630) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:52 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den lol, like 10% of guys have the opportunity to "pump and dump". all enabled by becky and stacey (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004646) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:54 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce This is not true. I am Short Short Short and I pumped and dumped a lot of women. If I can do it then 10% is way too low. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004655) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:55 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den quotemo anecdote aside, read up on hypergamy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004659) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:59 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce Brother I was reading Roissy back in 2009. I'm as well-versed in hypergamy as any. But xo is a little bit too fatalistic about this. Get in shape and act confident. I've done edibles on first dates to make me more gregarious. It's not like you'll slay all of a sudden, but you'll do better on the margins. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004687) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:00 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den what percent of men do you think are doing the shit you did? if youre doing PUA shit you are absolutely not representative of the pack (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004697) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:06 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce I wasn't really doing "PUA shit" in the literal sense, but I was taking advice to heart in terms of taking girls to multiple venues in one night, escalating with physical contact, going out of my way not to act like my autistic true self, etc. Or maybe I just tended to filter for sluts (okcupid was great for this in its heyday).
In any case, I'll concede it's probably harder than it used to be for the average faggot sperg now that instagram and other social media dominates dating (and I am decidedly and intentionally not on instagram) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:09 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den anyone reading blogs with "kino escalate" in their vocab is doing PUA shit imo
seems like you missed the point tbh. im not talking about whether its hard or not. its just a fact that the vast majority of guys are not "pumping and dumping" these girls. this is not even arguable |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:11 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce The vast majority aren't, but that doesn't mean a lot of them can't. Or at least that used to be the case; who knows these days. I'm not single and haven't chased tail all that much recently. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004759) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:13 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den this subthread is about whether or not "men" as a group are culpable for pump and dumping these girls. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004763) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:14 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce as originally constructed, sure, you win that point. I was specifically responding to your contention in the sub-subthread as to re: whether more than 10% are capable of doing so. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004779) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:17 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den yeah most dudes can get laid if they looksmax and drastically change their personality. thats not what i meant. probably my fault for not making that clear (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004794) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 3:16 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford As long as you are over 5'8" not too fat or too skinny and not from the Asian continent, you can pump and dump chicks if you lower your standards. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005146) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:05 PM Author: Marvelous french chef chad And that's what truly breaks an app chick down . . . getting lumped and dumped not by chad, but by some second tier "nice guy" who she definitely was not sportfucking and had slotted into the beta provider ltr category. A few of those and she's absolutely ruined. Either she clams up and becomes combative about sex and pushes away legitimate suitors, or she devalues the act so much (to rationalize the piece of herself that she lost) that the floodgates open and she just starts fucking anyone and everyone with reckless abandon. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005351) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 2:11 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45009236) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:18 PM Author: Big-titted market OKCupid was AMAZING for this, you could literally filter for women who said YES to questions like sex on date one, and other random sexual things (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005396) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:27 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005431) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:47 PM Author: onyx piazza lettuce yeah man
shrews decided we couldn't have this anymore |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:08 AM Author: Magenta infuriating field or anything else for that matter, eg other autist niche interests, preferences or views. it was amazing (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008487) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:56 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford I am not Chad. I just pumped and dumped ugly chicks. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004667) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:59 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den Chads are fucking the ugly chicks too. look at any dating app survey (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004683) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:00 PM Author: impressive poppy address yarmulke Oh I don’t doubt they get tons of free dinners and can ride Chad cock multiple nights a week if they want in their 20s. But they don’t have wedding or travel dates and when it comes time to marry they don’t. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004696) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:29 PM Author: Marvelous french chef chad By "extremely challenging for men" you mean extremely challenging for average and below men. The top 1/5 are benefiting immensely from dating apps and have it easier than ever before. I have been both above and below the cutoff point (with different pictures) so I have seen the feast and famine firsthand. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004498) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 5:31 PM Author: Overrated Library I know a 25 year old, slightly chubby latina gal, who's about 4'11", maybe a 4.5 when drunk and she has dates lined up every single night with seemingly (at least financially) successful dudes. She just gets free meals and ghosts the beta ones and gets PnD'd by the slumming Chads.
You can see why feminists/libs want to ban firearms. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:24 PM Author: comical university Lot of emotionally unavailable men ITT (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004160) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:01 PM Author: Ruby yapping meetinghouse rigpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004700) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 4:02 AM Author: passionate chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007885) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:28 PM Author: Iridescent roast beef menage XO proves the writer’s point. So much bitterness and mental illness here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004185) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:35 PM Author: arousing henna juggernaut resort This article is dumb, but I think xoxo overstates the importance of height, physical appearance, being a "Chad", etc. Yes, it can be much more difficult to get an initial swipe if you are short and/or ugly. Having said that, my limited experience suggests that after matching, you get a lot of mileage from being able to write in complete sentences and not demanding sex/naked pics in your first message and just generally not acting like an aspie freak. I never considered myself to be a "Chad," but I have landed dates with girls that I thought were out of my league simply by not being an aspie freak. Although I guess that is probably going to be too difficult for most poasters. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004215) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:36 PM Author: Provocative ticket booth https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/001/321/410/7d9.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004225) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:38 PM Author: Ruby yapping meetinghouse rigpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004237) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:41 PM Author: Concupiscible Chartreuse Alpha Range (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004253) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:44 PM Author: comical university Among my friends, the ones who blame Chad privilege the most for their dating problems are also the ones who are least willing to grow or work on their issues. One friend in particular has always had an easy time getting dates with attractive women and has probably slept with well over 100 women but could never settle down on one. Now that he's in his late 30s and having a hard time matching with girls in their 20s, he won't shut up about how hypergamous women and Chad. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004263) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:55 PM Author: Ruby yapping meetinghouse rigpig dude, we're not complaining about and making fun of this stuff because it's hard for us to personally fuck women in this current arrangement
we're making fun of this shit because it's absolutely fucking retarded and destructive for society as a whole, and it's utterly ridiculous to watch women babbling about how they want "emotionally available" men who "go to therapy" when in reality they want the complete opposite |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:59 PM Author: Provocative ticket booth cr
remember you are talking to a simp he will not be able to internalize any of this and will probably lash out |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:28 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004495) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:09 PM Author: Concupiscible Chartreuse Alpha Range cr, marriedmos don’t understand how hard it is out here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004402) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:58 PM Author: misunderstood nowag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004362) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 4:03 AM Author: passionate chapel (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007892) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:42 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead "Having said that, my limited experience suggests that after matching, "
lmao let you stop you right there. If there's an "after matching" for you, then you're taller and more handsome than the leftover men being discussed ITT. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:02 PM Author: arousing henna juggernaut resort I won't lie; I'm 6'1" and have a full head of hair. I'm also a professor in a college town, and a surprising number of girls have fantasies about that. Also, it's a LAC-type college with an absurdly skewed gender ratio, which I'm sure also helps.
But I still feel like I'm not wealthy or good-looking enough to match with hot college girls when I'm in my mid-to-late 30's. And I have had a lot of girls tell me, "I agreed to meet you because you were the first one who used correct grammar and didn't send dick pics immediately after matching." So if you're a bald 5'1" Asian, you're probably fucked regardless. But I also think that many of the autists on this bort are incapable of acting like anything other than an aspie freak around women and then blame their lack of dating success on Chad. |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 4:03 AM Author: Startled wine national security agency Whoa--hey look, guys! This is the guy knows women. He gets it. And he knows they're not like that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007887) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:30 AM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008587) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:33 AM Author: Provocative ticket booth (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008604) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 5:57 PM Author: Misanthropic Appetizing Crackhouse (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013638) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 12:47 PM Author: Unhinged Hairraiser Public Bath This assumes that 100% straight, non gay men cannot nonetheless be men who have sex with men. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004281) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:07 PM Author: Thriller degenerate this is not flame, I know a 5'3" Indian guy who gets a ton of matches now that he became emotionally available (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004395) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:11 PM Author: pungent razzle cuck We hate shrews they are our natural mates. They rejected us for Chad buffet and are now forever alone. But so are we, except it wasn't our choice. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004417) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:23 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold single men would rather blame "shrews", "chad", "height" or "canthal tilt" than admit that they really don't offer much.
a lot of men don't want a relationship at all; they just want to sexually conquer as many women as possible. that's all fine, but it's totally bitchmade to whine about sexual conquest being difficult.
among men who think they want a relationship, many are approaching it from a perspective of overwhelming entitlement. they want a beautiful, submissive woman to take care of the household, but they never once ask themselves what would motivate such a woman to do that. they simply don't care what women think about anything or want, which is also fine, but it shouldn't be surprising that such a perspective is unappealing to many women |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:26 PM Author: Floppy whorehouse Yeah and when your selling pitch is “in the past you would have HAD to marry me!” I don’t think it’s gonna work out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004488) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:28 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004496) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:33 PM Author: Ruby yapping meetinghouse rigpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004511) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:43 PM Author: pungent razzle cuck Women are very short term in their thinking. They don't realize how quickly they depreciate.
This leads to very poor decisions, as those who were not good enough for them very soon end up out of their reach. This is the key in the mismatch.
Men are much more balanced in their self assessment.
Ultimately unmarried men imply the same number of unmarried women. That is not good for women, but are the choosers and they miscalculate.
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:51 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004637) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:13 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold counterpoint: it is good for women, because the unmarried men are trash. where there are a bunch of trash guys, a bunch of women are going to lose out and either end up single or married to a trash guy. this is a mathematical inevitably. of these two options, being single is better (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005380) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:32 PM Author: Exhilarant stead mad-dog skullcap Yeah, I think in the end that's about right. In the olden days, guys had a clear path to financial stability and maturity and women didn't have as much means to achieve independence. The balance has shifted. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005463) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 3:25 AM Author: pungent razzle cuck Being sub 5'10 doesn't mean a man wouldn't be a good father or husband (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007817) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 7:39 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold there are tons of married men who are shorter than 5'10". xo overestimates the importance of height to an absurd degree (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013906) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:47 PM Author: comical university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004972) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:27 PM Author: Concupiscible Chartreuse Alpha Range (Shrew) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004490) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:31 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead Guy: "I make more than enough money to raise a family, the scenario I'm envisioning is that I'd handle the money, your every need is taken care of and eventually we have children, for whom you'd be the primary caregiver."
Shrew: "Yeah but what's in it for me. Reminder I have a master's degree in social work." |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:33 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold so what? if you think you're offering a good deal and the other person doesn't want it, it isn't a good deal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004510) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:34 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den or the other person has poor judgement (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004519) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:36 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold would you take that deal? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004529) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:37 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den I'm not interested in marriage/kids at all. but that's something women usually want (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004542) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:44 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold well apparently a lot of women don't want to be married to a man who doesn't care what they think and expects them to just be a submissive caretaker
men who do want to be married can either take that into account or die mad |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:48 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den ok. but no more sobbing TikTok videos from hysterical 30+ yo women starting to realize that they've "lost their chance". demanding 30+ yo men "date their own age" etc. deal? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004611) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:42 PM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead So women want a guy taller and richer than them because they don't date down, but also they don't want to raise children because they have a master's degree (but doesn't make enough money to live the lifestyle she'd prefer to live). So her ask is a guy who is willing to fund her lifestyle, pay for the family, and also pay for the nanny because she ain't watching the kids.
Yeah, of course, women can spurn suitors for any or no reason, but their demands here are insane. Of course the dating market has hundreds of men chasing available women, if women had reasonable demands they wouldn't be single for long. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:45 PM Author: fuchsia sweet tailpipe cuckold yeah made up women from incel message boards sure are awful (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004600) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:02 AM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead The specifics of a woman's insane demands vary but this is accurate. They have hundreds of men hitting on them every week, thousands a year. If they had reasonable demands, then they wouldn't be single. Every single man is wrong? Okay, what were you hoping candidate 9,972 had that the previous 9,971 guys didn't? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008458) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:10 AM Author: useless motley police squad halford Once a woman hits a certain age, 25 or so, all the decent guys in her age band are taken. The real problem women should avoid is waiting too long. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008504) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 9:28 AM Author: racy mint giraffe den (Captain Obvious) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011731) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:33 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den I mean, if women want to settle down with a man who "cares what they think" theyre going to either settle for an "emotionally available" beta or ride the cock carousel until they hit the Wall (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004508) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:46 PM Author: comical university (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004967) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 1:57 PM Author: magical cerebral set XO is stupid about apps. Apps ruin dating for both men and women, just for different reasons, but XO refuses to admit that women get utterly fucked too.
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:01 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford The apps are the problem.
You can't change human nature, so get rid of the apps. Get rid of birth control. |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 7:31 PM Author: ruddy stimulating partner garrison Women don’t get fucked until they hit like 35. Until then they are getting P&D’d and living the dream (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013879) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:21 PM Author: lemon 180 forum pozpig love how they blame men and discuss what they need to do when the problem is females (hypergamy, obesity, etc) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004816) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 2:25 PM Author: lemon 180 forum pozpig if you read the thing it actually has zero empirical data or backing for any of these conclusions (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45004841) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 4:32 PM Author: Crimson irradiated stock car ceo tldr. youre supposed to meet your spouse in college. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005465) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 5:23 PM Author: Startled wine national security agency Younger and middle-aged men are the loneliest they’ve ever been in generations, and it’s probably going to get worse tp (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45005671) |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 8:46 PM Author: titillating patrolman Part of the reason that only 38% of women are on the apps is because they don't really work for women either.
They get TOO MANY messages from too many guys. If you get 100 messages a week from different guys "interested" in you, you quickly realize none of those guys are actually interested in you. |
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Date: August 12th, 2022 9:12 PM Author: arousing henna juggernaut resort Anecdotal evidence from my female friends suggests that while it is true that women get lots of attention on these apps, 95% of the messages are dick pics, "when do u wanna fuck"-type messages, or from 50-year-old bald dudes who weigh 300 pounds. Filtering through all that to find guys that she might actually want to date (or even hook up with) is so much work that many don't want to bother and just delete the app. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45006766) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 3:21 AM Author: Marvelous french chef chad And yet these women literally voted for this with their feet by abandoning dating sites like okcupid for apps. There was a time when any woman could get numerous messages from guys genuinely "interested" in her just by signing up and writing a decent profile. Tons of messages from guys with similar interests, statistically measured for compatibility, genuinely interested in relationships.
But the brutal truth is that even when okcupid was in vogue, most women were too lazy to even write a profile that would allow anyone to actually be "interested" in them on anything other than a physical level. And when something came along that took even less effort than writing a bad okcupid profile, they quickly moved. And then even the women who had actually put in a reasonable amount of effort moved, because rather than finding someone compatible, they picked the lowest effort path to connect with Chad based on looks alone.
They're getting exactly what they voted for. |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 3:51 AM Author: Navy Insane Space (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007864) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 4:04 AM Author: Startled wine national security agency (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45007895) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:24 AM Author: Iridescent roast beef menage What are you talking about? Only the old chicks on these dating apps were also around for OKC. People under 30 never even heard of it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011557) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:01 AM Author: gaped abnormal stag film circlehead This is just a restatement of this being trivially easy for women and impossible for men.
The man you want is in there somewhere-- if you're getting 100 messages a week that is five thousand in a year (let's assume you take a couple weeks off to get a round number). Is every single one of them, 100% unsuitable? Of course not, unless your standards are insane (must be a tall astronaut). Literally all you have to do is read and decide which man you want and you can be done if you care to but, gosh darn it, selecting from all the men competing for your attention is too much work so fuck it. And that's not even considering what women can do if they actually take initiative, which most do not.
Meanwhile it doesn't matter what a man does-- women are so flooded with messages it won't be read anyway, so even the tall astronaut is screaming into the void. He won't get 5,000 matches in a lifetime, let alone the 5,000 a woman can get in a year merely by virtue of being a woman.
It's your prerogative to not even bother reading the messages of the suitors competing for your attention but then you've waived any right to complain about being single ever. The match for you is in there somewhere, you just don't have the time for him. |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:45 AM Author: magical cerebral set If men had unlimited access to Becky's pussy they would pursue Becky too. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45008635) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 2:12 PM Author: racy mint giraffe den (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45009241) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:24 PM Author: useless motley police squad halford The men aren't there. The bottom 50 percent of men are undesirable to the entire female race. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45010878) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:16 AM Author: misunderstood nowag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011554) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:51 AM Author: Lascivious doobsian trailer park Its been posted above but I just want to reiterate for the thoughtful and balanced moderates like LTM who continue to insist that the major contributor here is male financial/emotional instability:
The first iteration of dating sites were OKC, Match, etc. Whichever platform women go on, men follow. Why did those early platforms, with much more detailed profiles, life questions, get replaced with Tinder? Why did women mass migrate to a platform that is almost exclusively picture driven?
The dumbass middle-ground types can't really explain that dynamic without implicitly agreeing that:
1. Women are the sexual selectors 2. Women have explicitly selected to exclusively have short-term flings with the top 10% of chad and ignore the other 90% 3. This happened outside of any context of a lack of male financial success (case-in-point: This trend was just as prevalent and growing in 2008 as it was in 2018, even though the economic situations were vastly different).
The thoughtful moderate take will still be to partially, or mostly, blame male attitudes and financial failures, but its a chicken/egg situation. Female mating decisions has driven men to bifurcate into either PnDers or incel losers. You can't then turn around and blame both those groups for the lack of good men to marry. Women were the ones who sowed the seeds. |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 5:42 PM Author: arousing henna juggernaut resort Yes, I am sure the problem is 100% women. The fact that you spend your spare time poasting misogynistic material on a racist chat bort has nothing to do with your inability to get laid. It couldn't possibly be that you are just a loser with nothing to offer women. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45009928) |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 11:30 PM Author: Lascivious doobsian trailer park Lol I'm married my guy
There are plenty of things in the world that men are responsible for. Dating dynamics is just not one of them. Women drive the show, they are largely responsible for the outcome.
If most women decided to only look for men at McDonald's restaurants, you'd see the entire male population start eating Big Mac's daily |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 7:00 PM Author: big claret gas station son of senegal you are correct (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013805) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:17 AM Author: misunderstood nowag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011555) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:54 AM Author: swollen pit shitlib "The first iteration of dating sites were OKC, Match, etc. Whichever platform women go on, men follow. Why did those early platforms, with much more detailed profiles, life questions, get replaced with Tinder? Why did women mass migrate to a platform that is almost exclusively picture driven?"
I think you are ignoring some relevant facts here.
First, the switch from OkCupid-style dating sites to Tinder-style dating apps was probably more to do with the rise of smartphones than anything else. Remember that hilarious-but-kind-of-true thread about how women basically didn't go online before the iPhone: https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=4396695&mc=126&forum_id=2
The Tinder swiping format is better suited for a smartphone screen than the OkCupid-style long profiles and questions are. I don't have the data to back it up or anything, but my sense is that apps like Tinder are way more popular than their OkCupid/Match predecessors ever were. Online dating used to be for weirdos, no?
Second, you seem to have a romanticized view of the earlier dating sites as being more "personality-oriented" based on the fact that they allowed longer profiles and lifestyle questions and so forth. But the truth is, those sites were just as shallow and looks-based as Tinder. This graph says it all:
https://psmag.com/.image/t_share/MTI3NTgyNDgxNjExMzAzNTU1/5.png
More discussion of OkCupid being thoroughly looks-based, including the experiment where they hid everyone's photos for a day and conversations stopped cold when the photos came back, data showing that profiles are rated the same with or without profile text, etc.:
https://web.archive.org/web/20160205013352/http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/we-experiment-on-human-beings/ |
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Date: August 13th, 2022 4:10 PM Author: Magenta infuriating field a bunch of my lib relatives posted this to fb and are gleefully cackling at the downfall of male jerks. i really want to drop this wisdom on them, but it just makes me depressed honestly (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45009615) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:29 AM Author: Iridescent roast beef menage So many depressed angry losers ITT. No wonder women ignore you on apps (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011559) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:59 AM Author: swollen pit shitlib You sound like the journalist in that Michael Crichton quote about Gell-Mann amnesia. "Wet streets cause rain!" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45011569) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 6:58 PM Author: big claret gas station son of senegal good quote (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013799) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 9:24 PM Author: Iridescent roast beef menage One girl rejects you and you turn into a mass shooter. Fucking losers (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45014317) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 8:07 PM Author: Thriller degenerate plenty become depressed losers because they can't get a woman
a vicious cycle |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 7:26 PM Author: Diverse Masturbator Dumb article. This is obviously an age issue, where men are happy to date fertile women for 60-70 years, but women age out of that by their late 30s. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45013872) |
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Date: August 14th, 2022 8:17 PM Author: Crimson irradiated stock car ceo *mid 20s* (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5172124&forum_id=2#45014017) |