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Alt war of 1812 where Napoleon heads to America instead of 100 Days

A chill wind was blowing off the Atlantic and into Napoleon'...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
Almost delightfully cheesy, but the foreshadowing at the end...
Bronze fanboi
  10/07/22
Maybe it's Talleyrand.
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
While wiki-diving I found this map of the percentage of prie...
Bronze fanboi
  10/07/22
Funny how enduring these things can be.
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
Nous sommes gars de Bretagne, Fidèles au Roi, (Au Ro...
Bronze fanboi
  10/07/22
...
Titillating Haunting Toaster
  10/08/22
Chapter II. Napoleon didn't waste any time in making his...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
...
Bronze fanboi
  10/07/22
"You see Governor, General Jackson has discovered the k...
Comical milky mental disorder genital piercing
  10/14/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/14/22
...
Swollen boistinker coffee pot
  12/20/22
"Yes, I can take you there," he said, beady eyes n...
sexy feces
  10/07/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
...
Tantric bull headed temple
  10/07/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
...
Pale cowardly incel
  10/14/22
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Curious Frisky Field Halford
  10/14/22
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Salmon Dopamine
  10/14/22
"Napoleon felt energized as he walked down Broadway in ...
Outnumbered Nofapping Location
  10/07/22
He was one of history's most euthymic people and he just esc...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
this is actually an interesting question - when did cities/s...
Outnumbered Nofapping Location
  10/07/22
Good question. Worth checking Balzac. I don't think it's tha...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
not nyc in 1812, to a guy who had seen and experienced the c...
Diverse Amethyst Legal Warrant
  10/27/22
Napoleon almost always felt energized, though!
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/27/22
I must say, this subthread reminds me of a Word comment edit...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/27/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/07/22
...
Titillating Haunting Toaster
  10/08/22
Fuck yes the Andrew Jackson(best POTUS)/Napoleon dark allian...
Brilliant tanning salon dingle berry
  10/08/22
180. Incredibly CR response. The concept I have here is t...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/08/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/12/22
Good to see you poasting with us, Harry Turtledove.
Iridescent Gas Station
  10/12/22
He really went/was revealed as shitlib with his "Confed...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/12/22
...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/14/22
Michel Ney did
unhinged crackhouse
  10/14/22
Obviously there will need to be a plot point when Napoleon i...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/14/22
...
Titillating Haunting Toaster
  10/14/22
...
Comical milky mental disorder genital piercing
  10/17/22
Just want to wake up and find I've written this whole thing ...
Buff mewling candlestick maker
  12/20/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/18/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/19/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/19/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/27/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  11/01/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  11/23/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  12/20/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  12/29/22
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  09/21/23
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Buff mewling candlestick maker
  10/12/23


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 8:43 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

A chill wind was blowing off the Atlantic and into Napoleon's face. He had never liked cold weather, even when he was a boy back in Ajaccio on the Mediterranean island of Corsica. It was one of the things he missed about his exile on Elba: the warm sunlight and blue waters. But at least on Elba he had been emperor, if only in name. Here, in America, he was just another man with a dream.

Braced by the cold, Napoleon felt energized as he walked down Broadway in Manhattan. This new world--with its opportunity for anyone to make something of themselves regardless of birth or station--was everything that France wasn't. And it suited him well; after all, hadn't he risen from humble beginnings himself? He could see why Thomas Jefferson spoke so highly of this place; it really was a paradise for those who valued liberty, merit, and opportunity. And, above all else, revenge.

Chapter I

The Indian mildew had ruined the tobacco crop for the third year in a row, and John Barbour was desperate. He had tried switching to indigo, but that market had collapsed, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep his head above water. So when Napoleon Bonaparte showed up on his doorstep one cold winter morning, looking for a guide to take him into the French territory of Louisiana, John saw an opportunity.

"Yes, I can take you there," he said. "It'll cost you, though."

"I am aware," Napoleon replied. He had no illusions about his current financial situation; after all, he was essentially penniless. But if this journey could help him achieve his goals, then it would be worth every cent.

They set out the next day, crossing the Hudson River into New Jersey before making their way westward across the state. The going was tough--the roads were little more than rutted paths through the woods, and more than once they had to double back when they lost their way--but finally they reached Pennsylvania. From there it was an easy journey down the Ohio River into Kentucky and then westward again into Tennessee and Arkansas Territory before arriving in Louisiana.

The trip took nearly two months, during which time Napoleon learned a great deal about America from his genial guide. He was fascinated by the country's history--especially its struggle for independence from Britain--and impressed by its natural beauty. He also came to appreciate the Americans' love of liberty and opportunity; it reminded him of his own youthful dreams for France.

Finally, on Christmas Eve 1815, they arrived in New Orleans.

"Merry Christmas, Mr. Barbour," Napoleon said as he clasped the American's hand in farewell. "Thank you for everything."

"Don't mention it," John replied. "Just be careful out there; Louisiana is a dangerous place."

Napoleon nodded and set off down the street, his mind already filled with plans for the future. He'd already spotted the shadowy figure of a man following him, but he wasn't worried. After all, he had faced far worse dangers in his life.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294383)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 8:47 AM
Author: Bronze fanboi

Almost delightfully cheesy, but the foreshadowing at the end nudges it back into the realm of bad taste. It's like sitting on Chekhov's bayonet.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294389)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 8:50 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Maybe it's Talleyrand.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294400)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 8:55 AM
Author: Bronze fanboi

While wiki-diving I found this map of the percentage of priests that swore to the Constitution. It also doubles as a map of how cucked each department is, down to the present day.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a4/Carte_des_pr%C3%AAtres_asserment%C3%A9s_en_France_en_1791.svg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294414)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 8:56 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Funny how enduring these things can be.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294418)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:00 AM
Author: Bronze fanboi

Nous sommes gars de Bretagne,

Fidèles au Roi, (Au Roi!)

Nos aïeux ont fait campagne,

Pour venger le Roi. (Le Roi!)

Et la lande armoricaine

En est rouge encor; dondaine.

Ah, ah, ah! Debout les gars, vive le Roi!

(Ah, ah, ah! Debout les gars, vive le Roi!)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294428)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2022 1:51 AM
Author: Titillating Haunting Toaster



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45298919)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:05 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Chapter II.

Napoleon didn't waste any time in making his presence known in New Orleans. He went straight to the governor's palace and requested an audience with Governor Claiborne. The request was granted, and Napoleon got right down to business.

"Governor Claiborne," he began, "I have come to Louisiana with a proposition for you."

Claiborne leaned back in his chair and regarded the small man before him carefully. He had heard rumours of this so-called "emperor" who had been exiled to Elba, but he hadn't given them much credence. Now, it seemed, the rumours were true.

"And what would that be?" he asked warily.

"I would like your introduction to General Andrew Jackson," Napoleon replied. "I believe that we could be of assistance to each other."

Claiborne considered this for a moment. He didn't like the idea of getting involved in whatever scheme this man was cooking up, but he knew that it would be unwise to refuse outright. After all, Napoleon Bonaparte was still a force to be reckoned with, even in exile.

"Very well," he said finally. "I will see what I can do."

"I'm sure you understand that time is of the essence," Napoleon said. "The British are already planning their next move, and we must be ready for them."

Claiborne nodded. He didn't like it, but he would play along for now. There was no telling what this man was capable of, and he didn't want to find out the hard way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294437)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:07 AM
Author: Bronze fanboi



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294441)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 10:47 AM
Author: Comical milky mental disorder genital piercing

"You see Governor, General Jackson has discovered the key to limitless coin. I wish to ally with him.

His covered wagon lots have become the talk of both sides of the Atlantic. Apparently, by simply selling the act of sexual congress to the wagon drivers, he is now the richest man in this territory."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45330205)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 10:49 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45330221)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2022 9:26 AM
Author: Swollen boistinker coffee pot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45661024)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:15 AM
Author: sexy feces

"Yes, I can take you there," he said, beady eyes narrowing. "It'll cost you, though."



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294459)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:19 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294474)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 2:20 PM
Author: Tantric bull headed temple



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45295831)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 2:20 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45295836)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 9:34 AM
Author: Pale cowardly incel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45329823)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 10:50 AM
Author: Curious Frisky Field Halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45330227)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 2:07 PM
Author: Salmon Dopamine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45331319)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:15 AM
Author: Outnumbered Nofapping Location

"Napoleon felt energized as he walked down Broadway in Manhattan"

maybe in 2022 but in 1812 broadway was a wide dirt road with a couple of two story buildings - I doubt anyone would feel energized walking amongst the horse shit and mud.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294462)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:19 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

He was one of history's most euthymic people and he just escaped Elba. But maybe Wall St or something? Idk.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294473)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:23 AM
Author: Outnumbered Nofapping Location

this is actually an interesting question - when did cities/streets develop the power to energize people? its an old standard in stories now to have the fresh faced hero arrive on the bustling scene of [insert large/exotic city] but when did that start. maybe this is how dickens described london in GE?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294487)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 9:30 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Good question. Worth checking Balzac. I don't think it's that new. Cities are energizing even if crapulent.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45294498)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2022 8:24 AM
Author: Diverse Amethyst Legal Warrant

not nyc in 1812, to a guy who had seen and experienced the creme de la creme of paris and berlin and so on's fashionable quarters

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45395668)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2022 8:33 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Napoleon almost always felt energized, though!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45395680)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2022 1:35 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

I must say, this subthread reminds me of a Word comment edit war in an overworked brief. Well done.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45396905)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2022 2:19 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45295830)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2022 1:51 AM
Author: Titillating Haunting Toaster



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45298920)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2022 6:00 AM
Author: Brilliant tanning salon dingle berry

Fuck yes the Andrew Jackson(best POTUS)/Napoleon dark alliance is my favorite historical what if

I believe Jackson was a Bonaparte admirer even though he was generally not a fan of what he considered to be a despotic old world regime. He pathologically hated the British though which seems to have been THE underlying motivation behind nearly all his major policy decisions (kill the bank, Seize the land, Destroy the nullifiers)

War of 1812 is such an underrated conflict because it really was America’s piece of the Napoleonic wars. The timing on Battle of New Orleans and the 100 days is quite interesting, the Brit’s had seasoned Peninsular War vets in North America (including I believe some of the 95th rifles) and the outcome resulted in the transfer of at least some of these guys back to Europe to participate in Waterloo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45299202)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2022 9:22 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

180. Incredibly CR response.

The concept I have here is that the U.S. splits along proto-Civil War lines in the middle of the War of 1812, but the Confederacy ends up being run by Napoleon and the Union by Andrew Jackson, and they both form an alliance against Britain & the Fifth Coalition forces.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45299482)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 12th, 2022 6:07 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45318703)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 12th, 2022 6:16 AM
Author: Iridescent Gas Station

Good to see you poasting with us, Harry Turtledove.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45318710)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 12th, 2022 6:18 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

He really went/was revealed as shitlib with his "Confederate of Trumpmos" turn. Very sad. But ty

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45318712)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 9:27 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45329775)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 10:14 AM
Author: unhinged crackhouse

Michel Ney did

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45330011)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 10:15 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Obviously there will need to be a plot point when Napoleon is in deep shit during a Southern campaign, only to be saved by a shining paladin at the head of a professionally-drilled militia, "Peter Ney".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45330015)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2022 2:02 PM
Author: Titillating Haunting Toaster



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45331289)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2022 5:59 PM
Author: Comical milky mental disorder genital piercing



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45346508)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2022 9:21 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker

Just want to wake up and find I've written this whole thing and forgotten about it. Ditto with the battle manga series about the Successor Wars (after Alexander dies).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45660992)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 18th, 2022 8:34 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45349002)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 19th, 2022 2:42 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45355068)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 19th, 2022 1:06 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45356691)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2022 8:01 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45395652)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 1st, 2022 4:35 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45420312)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 23rd, 2022 9:32 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45534347)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2022 8:57 AM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45660863)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2022 7:12 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#45713726)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 21st, 2023 12:18 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#46825658)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 12th, 2023 5:39 PM
Author: Buff mewling candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5207565&forum_id=2#46926696)