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I find myself horribly unattractive
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Date: December 24th, 2009 3:53 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line but I get told I am pretty regularly. I think people lie and I'm not sure why they do it (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639037) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 3:58 PM Author: Hairraiser green school striped hyena oh wow you're pretty!
You really, really are! |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:00 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yeah. it probably seem like that was what I was looking for in this thread. It wasn't. I really am not pretty. I just find it funny how people feel a need to lie to women about this, especially since it is uninvited (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639069) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:04 PM Author: Hairraiser green school striped hyena That's not what I was saying.
I think it's just annoying irl when people give you compliments and it sounds like they're trying to comfort you over an insecurity, when you didn't even say anything to indicate you needed comfort.
It's really condescending. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:11 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line this is true. I mean if I brought it up, then I would understand their comments, obviously. If I said, "God I'm hideous!" I would not bitch when people disagree because they were trying to be polite. But I quietly accept my fate so people should not feel a need to lie to me (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639121) |
Date: December 24th, 2009 3:55 PM Author: floppy beta theatre alpha oh hai me
I often am compared to my brother, looks-wise, who is about an objective 3. Then people always say I'm handsome and stuff. Talk about mixed messages! |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 3:57 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line not sure about you but I think people say it to me because it is what you are supposed to say to a woman (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639052) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:00 PM Author: Beady-eyed Doctorate why don't you and the poster above you post pics and i will OBJECTIVELY rate you (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639066) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:01 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yeah outting myself is not likely (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639072) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 3:58 PM Author: stimulating navy generalized bond business firm pwn3d!! (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639057) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:14 PM Author: chest-beating sexy yarmulke base is this you?
http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/4020/34956844.jpg |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:15 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line you caught me. So, do you think I'm pretty? LOL (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639145) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:17 PM Author: chest-beating sexy yarmulke base I'm sure you'll pass. :) (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639165) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:17 PM Author: Hairraiser green school striped hyena why is this woman being linked to so often?
Who is she? |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:23 PM Author: Titillating gaped area 181 (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640379) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:14 PM Author: Brindle roast beef FML would have been all over this thread asking you to email him pics
XO has lost so much talent in the last week. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:15 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line the Estrada brand is still going strong (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639148) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:16 PM Author: Brindle roast beef True, the competition is fleeing the market (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639150) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:16 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Do fellow women lie to you? As a man, I'm rarely compelled to tell even pretty women that they're attractive. I don't think I've ever commented on an unattractive woman's looks.
The one exception is that a friend of mine complained about turning 30 and remaining single. She said, "And my looks, which were never much to begin with, are fading." I told her: "Nah, I think you're pretty."
Ironically, I do think she's pretty. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:20 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line Mainly I get told I am attractive by fellow women and older men. Men my age, save my boyfriends, never gratuitously tell me I'm pretty. The exception being if I'm at a bar-in which case I get told I'm pretty by all the drunk men who are looking to score (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639191) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:21 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point You sound insecure.
Those men sound stupid.
How old are you? |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:22 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line Not so much insecure. I hate what I look like but I am resigned to it. It's just that I don't understand the need to lie (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639210) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:24 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point What's your figure like? Men forgive faces if they like the body. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639225) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:25 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line I actually have a pretty good body. It's just my face (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639238) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:26 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point What's wrong with your face? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639246) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:30 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line It's really wide and I have dark circles under my eyes (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639264) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:32 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Eye-shadow cures the second problem, despite my comments. I'm not sure why you mean by really wide. Are you fat? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639275) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:35 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line no. just bone structure is not great. not as horrible as some girls but not great. ok cheek bones but the whole face is just too wide (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639287) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:36 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point No guy thinks about this. Just be an easy lay. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639291) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:39 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line they think about this when it comes to findign a girl they want to be serious with (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639308) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:48 PM Author: Balding filthy place of business listen, it's not the bone but the innersoulsubstance that will eventually define your appearance. you're probably better than fine. so, better not to indulge by saying these kind of things. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639354) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:36 PM Author: startling stock car casino "really wide"-- are you asian? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639296) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:38 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line no. But it is kind of wide and flat (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639302) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:20 PM Author: startling stock car casino do you have a boyfriend? do you get asked out? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639190) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:21 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yes. Not as much as I used to when I was younger. Trust me, I am average to slightly above average-on a good day, with lots of make up (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639198) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:22 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Make up is a myth. Men aren't attracted to heavy eye-liner, eye shadow, and rogue. Women just think that. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639207) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:23 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line well, then, I guess I just am what I am (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639214) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:23 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Good. And avoid the heavy make-up. It makes most women look worse. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639222) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:27 PM Author: startling stock car casino what do you do when you like a guy but he doesn't ask you out? are you content with just going out with a bunch of guys who you're not really crazy about? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639251) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:29 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line I avoid a guy like the plague if he doesn't ask me out and if I like a guy he probably would never know. I just assume that he would not like me back and I would hate to send out signals because I would probably just appear pathetic. I don't really hang out with guys at all. I just hang out with girls. The few guys I hang out with are taken and I am friends with their gfs (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639261) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:31 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point This sounds like a winning strategy.
I know some girls who send deluges of signals, almost to the point of manipulation. Others do nothing. Guess which group is happier.
Also, you do realize that many signals are unconscious? |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:34 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yeah, I realize that many signals are unconcious and it bothers the hell out of me. With the way I look and how pathetic other areas of my life are, guys would just see it as a pathetic puppy dog crush. Why would I want to be pitied? Why would I want people to laugh behind my back? They probably already do since, like you say, signals are unconcious. What I should do is just lower my standards. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639283) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:36 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point I'm starting to think you're flame. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639289) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:36 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yeah. I'm not. I just hate rejection (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639295) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:39 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point As a man, I've always thought that rejection is worse for women, because it comes later in the relationship. I get rejected off-the-bat and know where I stand. A man might lead a woman on for a while before rejecting her. Many date women they don't consider marriage material. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639307) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:42 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line this is what happens to me (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639322) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:43 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Lower your standards? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639326) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:59 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line this is what happens to me. After a year of dating they don't want me anymore. After two years they finally get the nerve to call it quits (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639400) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:59 PM Author: startling stock car casino how does it feel when that happens to you? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639401) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:01 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line it sucks so I have basically stopped dating and settled for a semi-relationship with a guy I am not attracted to. if that makes sense (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639406) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:36 PM Author: startling stock car casino but how are you ever going to get with the guys you actually like then? do you just go on dates with guys you're not that into? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639290) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:38 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line um, I guess I'm not unless they like me too. If you are a really pretty girl you can worm your way in with a guy somewhat. If not, then I think you should let them come to you...so you don't look like the desperate ugly girl (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639301) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:40 PM Author: startling stock car casino you didn't answer the second question. do you just go on dates with guys you're not really into, while you avoid the guys you actually like? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639309) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:42 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line yes. I am not attracted to my current bf at all but I know I can't do better and I am lonely (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639320) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:42 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Okay, flame.
Any male would realize the lack of interest and move on. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:44 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line not true. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639329) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:43 PM Author: Brindle roast beef What if he proposes? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639325) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:43 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line he won't (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639328) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:44 PM Author: Brindle roast beef So why would an aging woman date him? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639332) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:46 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line where am I going to get any better? Where? No decent guys are asking me out (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639336) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:46 PM Author: Brindle roast beef So why not just marry this one then (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639342) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:57 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line I'm actually going to have to dump this one because I cannot even stand to sleep with him anymore (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639391) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:47 PM Author: Red Infuriating Incel Resort is he fat, or just ugly? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639349) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:59 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line both (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639402) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:05 PM Author: Red Infuriating Incel Resort sorry :(
maybe you go for fat good looking guys... (not really fat)
i have this theory that average thin people should meet up with attractive fat people. The beautiful people and fat ugly people can fuck each other. You'd probably have attractive kids |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:44 PM Author: startling stock car casino why aren't you attracted to your BF? are your standards too high for your own attractiveness? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639334) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 4:56 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line its probably a combination of too high standards and low self esteem (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639389) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:02 PM Author: startling stock car casino how are the other facets of your life? academic? career? friendships? etc. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639410) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:05 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line decent law school, not great grades, lots of friends (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639429) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:08 PM Author: startling stock car casino biglaw lined up? if you have so many friends, why are you so unhappy? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13639443) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 5:11 PM Author: Red Infuriating Incel Resort cause she's not getting laid
there was a lot of this at my UG (70% men, 1300 avg SAT score, not conducive to fucking hot girls) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:15 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Most friends aren't important for happiness, IMO. Many are almost worthless fair-weather types. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640322) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:16 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary i do, too some days other days i'm fairly grateful for what i have btw, i have a wide-ish face and deep/dark genetic undereye circles, too |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:22 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Women tend to be too hard on their looks. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640372) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:23 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary it's ingrained in us very early in life also, we ARE chicks who post on discussion boards which berate even perfectly attractive women |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:24 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point What do you mean very early? Did your mother criticize your looks as a little girl?
re: second point, yes, but surely you understand the difference between XOXO and real life. Men berate even the most attractive women on here, but it's a b.s. defense mechanism. They would love to date these women in real life. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:27 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary 1) Yes
2)No. Guys don't really approach me. Some stare/check me out, but they don't approach me. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:28 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point As a guy, you'll have to send out signals, otherwise you won't get anywhere. I'll check out girls, but if they don't look back even briefly, why should I approach? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640429) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:29 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary yeah, perhaps i seem too guarded i'm not a beauty, but i'm at least a 6 |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:30 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Even if you're not a beauty, I think people overemphasize the importance of looks. Interesting goes a long way. Too many attractive women have nothing going for them but their looks. They can talk about self-absorbed crap, but that's it. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640443) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:31 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary i agree. i'm intelligent, well-read, cultured. date mostly older men for these reasons. i should emphasize i'm not really ugly, tho. probably not even "average". |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:32 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Where do you find these older men? (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640461) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:35 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary work, social functions, literary/arts events, etc. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640482) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:37 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Literary and art events. Wow. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640493) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:38 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary Sorry that sounded pompous. I mean things like poetry readings, panel discussions, art openings, etc. Pretty standard big city 'cultural" events. I'm not into bars very much. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:40 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Where do you find these poetry readings? Or panel discussions?
My main hobby is poetry, and I would love to meet women at these events. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:42 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary In chicago, i love going to the uptown poetry slam at the green mill every sunday night. the university of chicago alsi hosts great events
the chicago council on foreign relations, the economics club, and the pritzker military library regulalry host great speakers, too
i'm usually the only young woman at thes events, but don't mind the company |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:43 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Interesting, I'm also in Chicago. I'll have to check these out.
What does UChicago do again? I'm surprised I've never heard of this. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:30 PM Author: Brindle roast beef You should strike a blow for equality of the sexes and approach guys who you like. Don't let anthropocentric norms stop you from getting what you want. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640445) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:31 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point I had to google this word: anthropocentric.
Congratulations, that Harvard education paid off well.
eta: I think you misused it, provided it means "the belief that humans must be considered at the center of, and above any other aspect of, reality." |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:35 PM Author: Brindle roast beef I'm pretty sure feminists use "anthropocentric" to mean "biased in favor of males".
"Anthropos" is Greek for "man" |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:37 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point How is a norm that men approach women biased in favor of men? I can see the sort of intuitive pro-male logic of it, but there are definitely many men who would prefer it the other way.
eta: including yourself, scrolling down a few posts. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:44 PM Author: Brindle roast beef I mean, I'm speaking in bad faith when I invoke feminist arguments in favor of that position. I'm pretty shy when it comes to women and I would strongly prefer that they come to me. It saves me from the whole "oh my god, does she like me or does she not?" crap.
But, the feminist argument would go "this rule tells women how to act, and therefore is part of keeping them down as a gender", etc. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:46 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Learning to discern interest is vital. You're still a little green if you have to do the "like me or not" stuff.
The feminist argument seems a little glib. Even if it tells women how to act, it also tells men how to act. It seems like a wash. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:51 PM Author: Brindle roast beef My aspie superpowers give me the ability to score well on standardized tests, but they do not extend to the ability to read women (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640580) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:53 PM Author: painfully honest twisted toaster point Just study body language, eye contact, verbal cues. This isn't harder than reading anything else -- just know what you're looking for and trust your gut instinct. (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640590) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:32 PM Author: irradiated ebony sanctuary i actually do this. this is how i met my current bf, who claims was too shy to approach me. |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 8:34 PM Author: Brindle roast beef cool, tell more of your female friends to be like this (https://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1173214&forum_id=2#13640479) |
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Date: December 24th, 2009 10:15 PM Author: saffron cocky brunch personal credit line I love this song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_Kx62PhHlA
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