Date: March 21st, 2011 10:42 AM Author: Pungent Nibblets
He just got back from Cabo spring break with his buddies. the following is the e-mail he sent me.
Quick funny rage story that you guys will appreciate...
So one night we're all out at the club 'Squid Roe' in Cabo (shitshow rage bar) and we had been raging for like 12-15 hours (no joke), because some of us started crushing drinks at noon at the pool. Well about 3am rolls around, and a bunch of my friends start peeling off and heading home. I was in the zone at this point, and I say "Not now chief... I'm staying."
So I then find myself a hot lady friend, we start dancing and hanging out and talking, and she and her friend "claimed" to go to Arkansas and were 20 years old (my chick later told me they went to 'Harding,' which was in Arkansas). They then asked me where I went, and I said I went to business school. *pause* ... "Where?".. "Umm... Harvard." They don't believe me at all. I also claim I'm 24 years old.
So I then proceeded to show them the rubber 'live strong' type bracelet that our group had made for our trip, that said "WINNING in Cabo, HBS SB 2K11" and I told them what HBS stood for. They still don't believe me. Then in tribute to one of my buddies who had done this at a bar once in total jest, I pull out my HBS ID, flash it to them, then put it in my mouth while continuing to dance. Boom. Game over. Making out with her on the dancefloor, then at like 430-5am she asks me to leave.
So it turns out that the house she was staying in was in the same hill housing complex that I was staying in, which ended up being pretty convenient. Because at like 7am after hooking up, she says "One thing I forgot to tell you... my friend's dad is staying here with us. You can't be here when he gets up or he'll freak out." I grab my shit and GTF out of there. But luckily for me, I knew where I was and had a short walk home.
She wanted me to meet up with her the following day, but I just partied somewhere else the next day and never saw her again. No numbers exchanged because I didnt have my phone, so I figured that was the end of that. All my friends were convinced she was actually in high school and she was probably 17 years old (lying about the college, friend's dad staying with them, etc.). So we all started referring to her as my hot high school gf.
...
Then today, I get a facebook friend request. I accept it. I first see that she is indeed 20 years old, and does go to Harding. I look at her photos. Check it out:
The last two photos are screenshots from her Facebook account. Check out the captions at the bottom of the photos. The second one is her wearing my bracelet the following day.
Date: March 21st, 2011 10:54 AM Author: bossy mad-dog skullcap business firm
lol. re-read the story. he was already in and avoided the harvard, actually until after talking and dancing. if you think HBS will get panties down on command you're no different than the brothers wearing their law school shit to the gym and thinking they'll get bj's on the treadmill or something.
Date: March 21st, 2011 10:54 AM Author: Talented School Cafeteria Brethren
and this is the sad thing about strivers
they strive and strive, often because they think getting into x business school, or having x car, or having y job, will finally land them hot girls.
the reality is far different. 1) those hot girls will still notice your completely lacking personality and overcompensation tactics and will be turned off, and 2) if you do manage to land that hot girl you've always coveted, she will be a gold digger looking for her next big score.
in other words: you'll continue to be a striver, working 60+ hour weeks, just so you can keep some blonde whore who doesn't love you and is just waiting for the day she can cash in
Date: March 21st, 2011 10:53 AM Author: Aphrodisiac Karate
i liked it, yes run of the mill, but i enjoyed. Indubitably, however, this is subtle "if i get into harvard, i am going to get laid" trolling. Citing a self-serving and reaffirming narrative...awaiting all poasters to ultimately, respond...of course he got laid, he went to HBS!
good luck, tho getting in.most indubitably, good luck
Date: March 21st, 2011 10:53 AM Author: wonderful khaki dysfunction
that's an awful lot of text to convey nothing very exciting. and worse still, it was ridden with internet-speak that would better befit a 12-year-old, as opposed to a person who is presumably in the mid-20's.
Date: March 21st, 2011 10:57 AM Author: Jet-lagged stage
This guy sounds like a gook. Only gooks and indian dudes brag about doing what they should be doing in their mid 20s. This guy had to flash around his ID in order to get some tail? Sounds gookugly.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:02 AM Author: sticky cumskin
Not really man- it's just not really that good of a strory. And I think the length of the email for such standard fare makes it seem like this guy should be a freshman in college, not in his mid 20s
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:03 AM Author: Talented School Cafeteria Brethren
exactly
while most normal college freshmen were out meeting folks and striking up conversations with random girls, sounds like this guy was in his dorm room jerking off so much his dick started to hurt
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:05 AM Author: Talented School Cafeteria Brethren
oh but remember
he goes to HBS
being a HBS pimply faced striver who can't get laid unless he's got a credit card in his hand is better than being an alpha 6'2 sec ex-linebacker who can fuck 9's by simply pointing at his dick (Hippo Beach Master)
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:11 AM Author: Talented School Cafeteria Brethren
the difference, a very crucial one you seem to miss, is that no matter how successful you are, no matter how much $$ you make, no matter what car you drive, you will always be intimidated when you talk to a hot girl. always. that sec linebacker won't be. that's what makes him alpha, and you beta. remember that.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:16 AM Author: Pungent Nibblets
keep telling yourself that buddy. enjoy being a washed out football player who is borderline retarded and has less wealth and prestige than a successful HBS alum.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:29 AM Author: arousing demanding affirmative action
She's a 20-year-old sorority girl. She probably is more impressed with a guy who is president of the top fraternity at her school than with some random, even if that random happens to go to HBS.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:30 AM Author: Pungent Nibblets
she probably knows tons of frat guys. but i'm pretty sure this is the first time she met a HBS dude. again, i think people on XO underestimate pedigree and prestige.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:41 AM Author: Pungent Nibblets
i'm just saying that it's naive to think that girls aren't impressed by a HBS guy, especially if he's decent looking and has a decent personality. frat boys are dime a dozen. who gives a fuck about them?
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:44 AM Author: arousing demanding affirmative action
Um, girls who have no concept of what Harvard is and whose concept of ultimate prestige is being QB of the football team or president of SAE at the flagship state school and having a daddy who's some regional bigshot? Girls like this probably think Deerfield is a place where you hunt, for shit's sake.
Date: March 21st, 2011 11:51 AM Author: arousing demanding affirmative action
"why do you think people are so obsessed with going there?"
Not everyone is. The kind of girl who attends college at some no-name place in Arkansas is not going to be obsessed with getting into Harvard, nor will she share the same concept of prestige of her Northeastern prep school counterparts.
Everyone acknowledges that smart people and some rich people go to Harvard. A girl from a no-name Arkansas college may think that's impressive on its face but the H-bomb won't get her panties as wet as hooking up with the big man on campus.
Date: March 21st, 2011 2:02 PM Author: supple shrine
psa, other things that help you close the deal on making out with a drunk college chick in cabo during spring break include: not looking like an ogre, having lips, breathing
Yeah, this didn't seem remotely worth the effort it took to write an email about it. Plus if this guy partied as hard as he claimed to, his details of the night shouldn't have been as clear.
If you think that you have to drop the HBS bomb to be able to hook up with some skank at Squid fucking Roe during spring break, you've got problems.
Date: March 22nd, 2011 6:43 AM Author: Fantasy-prone National Wrinkle
with the context of his past threads, it kind of perfectly encapsulates the type of dude who strives for HBS and holds the same attitude about it as the OP. nice enough, well informed, reasonably smart, but completely inept about normal social shit and a hardcore striver.
Date: March 21st, 2011 6:19 PM Author: Laughsome locale
this is supposed to be an extremely unusual occurrence? for a 24-year-old? omg he hooked up with a drunk girl FOUR years younger than him at spring break!!!!!
Date: March 21st, 2011 6:52 PM Author: Fantasy-prone National Wrinkle
his email sounds like me after the first time i went to mexico for spring break. only difference is i was 17, i got laid without ever saying where i went to school, and i didn't think any of this was actually all that impressive.
Date: March 21st, 2011 8:26 PM Author: glittery office
i am a sub-100 iq, barely employable, t6 can't get biglaw failure and I have never needed to resort to this level of psuedo-bro bullshit to hook up with a drunk sorority girl on spring break. If one of my friends sent out an email like that we'd make fun of him for years. I'm amazed
Date: March 22nd, 2011 6:48 AM Author: Fantasy-prone National Wrinkle
1. what kind of socially fagtarded tools make fake livestrong bracelets for any occasion, let alone something as mundane as a bro trip to mexico?
2. who writes email as "e-mail?" how is this dude an HBS candidate and yet somehow doesn't live in the same world as the rest of us where email is spelled as 'email.'
Date: March 22nd, 2011 10:36 AM Author: supple shrine
LISTEN UP!, there is zero jelly itt, even the most pathetic of basement virgins who have never done it realize just how low is the threshold for fucking a drunk chick on spring break, your friend is a sad douche and you are even sadder for envying him
Date: March 22nd, 2011 1:07 PM Author: talking station
have you ever gone to cabo for spring break? i don't think i've ever gone to squid roe and NOT ended up in some drunken hook up w/ a dude.
it's like shooting fish in the barrel. if he needed HBS to close the deal (on a college girl no less, not a hot newport beach 16 year old), that doesn't make for an impressive story.
also, i'm a bit surprised that they went to cabo for spring break. all the HBS/GSB people i know go to places like monaco and dubai and shit.
Squid Roe is for 16 - 21 year olds. I don't know anyone in business school who went to Cabo for spring break, let alone made queer little Livestrong bracelets to commemorate the occasion.